On Thursday, July 18, Governor Perry signed into law HB2, the bill that would ban abortion in Texas after 20 weeks. The bill would also require all clinics that provide abortion to be upgraded to surgical centers, and would require doctors who perform the service to have admitting privileges to hospitals within 30 miles. The bill was specifically designed to set standards that were impossible to meet in the designated timeframe (September 2014) which means that all but 5 clinics that provide abortions—one of their many services in regards to women’s healthcare—will have to shut their doors. Continue reading
rick perry
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To think, ’tis only May 1, and America’s favorite space-grifter and her most beloved hater of colleges have packed up and left the deranged playground that was the 2012 GOP presidential primary. Now that the least heinous most likable 1%er of the crop has been chosen, the side show collection of contenders will slowly slide back into the murky depths of K-street lobbying firms and Heritage Foundation-like ‘think-tanks’. Continue reading
Stupid person, and presidential candidate, Rick Perry, believes Kim Jong the Second died yesterday. Can we say that it’s possible “two” is the highest he can count, so this is why he remains stuck there forever? Continue reading
All is quiet. Every eye in the house is on you. You’re on the spot. You start talking, and talking, and then….it all stops. You’ve totally lost your train of thought. You can’t for the life of you remember what the hell it was you were going to say. You grasp onto any slight vestige of that thing you were supposed to remember. Just got to remember! What is it? Holy Inert Brain Function…JUST WHAT THE HELL IS IT?! It’s over. You never remembered. Instead you just stammered and stumbled like an idiot, as if your brain just leapt out of your head, hit the wall, sunk to the floor and then drooled on itself while screaming MARIGOLDS AND MUSTACHES! BOY THESE TWINKIES TASTE LIKE PAELLA!
This is what happened to Rick Perry.
Yeehaw!! Gather round youngins, it’s time for another Open Caption – Texas style! You know the rules: There aren’t any – just be funny!
Rick Perry mugged for the crowd while giving out canned answers to questions in New Hampshire today. One little boy [through his mother] asked about Evolution and the age of the Earth. Rick Perry seemed quite ready to speak to this question, answering it before the boy could follow the prompting of his mother.
“That’s a theory that is out there — and it’s got some gaps in it. In Texas we teach both Creationism and Evolution. Because I figure you’re smart enough to figure out which one is right.” [ USA Today ]
This is precisely why we have so many 10 year-old teachers down here in Texas. They’re just great at figuring things out. Here’s something Rick Perry should be trying to figure out: How’s he going to get elected with less than 40% of the Latino vote?