Last time on the Celebrity Apprentice, the gang had to make a video about mops. No, I’m not going to call it viral, because it wasn’t, unless we’re talking viral like strep. Clay boiled over and lashed out at Penn, for reasons we’re not really sure of, and the ladies bitched at each other behind their backs, causing them to loose. In the end, Tia went home. I know you’re thrilled. Spoilers after the jump! Continue reading
recaps
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The queens enter the workroom singing “Jesus is a Biscuit” and are generally in high spirits. “To my bitches, love y’all to death,” Jiggly has scrawled in lipstick on the mirror. Willam says: “At least the lipstick’s on the mirror and not on her teeth for once.” Rimshot! Willam isn’t really feeling humbled by having to lip-synch, probably because she was up against Certified Hot Mess, Jiggly. Sharon admits she might have to try a look without her contacts, which I respect. As much as it’s her signature thing, she really does listen to the judges.
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It’s probably fair to say that this second season was really a tale of two disparate seasons. We began in a place that so far stretched the limits of modern television drama that it was enough to make even the most staunch soap opera fan weep. It was filled with long expositions about the meaning of life, life without hope, what it means to be truly dead, and if there is ever a hope of seeing the Walkers as anything but ambulating meat sacks during near constant contemplation of right and wrong. Continue reading
Previously on The Celebrity Apprentice. George Takei was confused and didn’t know how to properly utilize the Hulk’s amazing ability to feel his feelings! There were shoes, and drama, and late people and Day and Night with Invanka. In the end, George got beamed back to the Enterprise, and gave us all his happy dance, which is more entertaining than this steaming pile of dreck. On to the recap! Continue reading
“Colored girl, why yo base look like chalk?” Well played, Milan. A funny spin on Ru’s lyrics is a light and memorable way to exit the show. You’re the first one to do this right. Chad said she loved Milan, that she was class act. For the most part, yes. I’m still disappointed that Milan didn’t compete as strongly as it seemed she would. Willam asks Jiggly if she thinks she’ll win the show. Crickets. Oookay then. Hit the jump, and let’s dish. Continue reading
The remaining queens enter the workroom and circle Kenya’s clothes hangers like vultures circling a carcass in the desert. Kenya has scribbled on the mirror in lipstick: “Phi Phi, I love you. Sisters forever.” Gross, Kenya. I think even less of you now. Phi Phi has a sad because her best friend is gone. Awww, Phi Phi has feefees. Isn’t that sweet? No. No, it is not. Phi Phi mentions that Milan has sent both Puerto Rican queens home. “You’re never going to be in West Side Story again. Not even a touring production, bitch,” Willam says. Welcome back, you funny bitch. I have missed this side of Willam. Milan says she’s not going to compromise. Hm. This feels familiar. Hit the jump, and let’s dish on last night’s episode. Continue reading
In the midst of a zombie apocalypse what is the worst thing you’ll face? The zombies themselves? Finding and maintaining food and shelter? Keeping your sanity? Or is it wondering if every “live person” you meet (if you meet any at all) will somehow threaten your already precarious existence? Continue reading
Crasstalkers, feel the heat that’s burning you up, ready or not. As always, there’s spoilers, so click on through with fierce abandon. Continue reading
When the queens enter the workroom, Willam immediately claims Madame’s hangers. Madame La Queer has scrawled on the mirror in lipstick: “Chad, Sharon, Milan, Dita = True Friends.” Awww that’s sweet, Madame. It’s a shame you spelled your friend DiDa’s name wrong. Willam says she doesn’t care. Willam, NO1CURR. “It’s a new day,” says Milan. Latrice is feeling good about her win: “America’s next drag superstar will be a big bitch!” As long as she’s you, Latrice, I am all for this. Okay, let’s see what else went down during last night’s episode! Continue reading
Thump, thump, tha-thump. Thump, thump, tha-thump. Yes, this is the way this episode opens, with the tenor of a heartbeat. We see both Rick and Shane scrambling to get away from another horde of zombies, but this time that Randall kid is with them. They’re where? At another school? Another deserted waylaid outpost? The zombies are catching up to Shane and he takes shelter in an abandoned school bus. Continue reading