Because I live in a small town that lacks a wide variety of restaurants that will bring food directly to my home so I decided to try Blue Apron, some assembly required, meal delivery service. It’s not that I’m one of those people who stares blankly in the produce section, at a loss over what tastes go with what tastes. I have game in the kitchen. But I prefer simple food (and delivery) because I’m lazy and it takes zero effort to turn damn near anything into a taco. Continue reading
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In this edition of “I saw it so you don’t have to” I saw The Other Woman this weekend. This movie was touted as the best female comedy since Bridesmaids. I haven’t been to many movies recently, but when a trainer at my gym asked people if anyone was interested in seeing this this weekend, I said sure, why not? I need more social outings with more than just my regular group of friends and I like Cameron Diaz and Leslie Mann. I started to read the Grantland review on Friday, but had to stop because things didn’t look good. Continue reading
I usually ignore fast food advertising, but I recently got a flier in the mail that grabbed my attention. A new place has opened nearby called Kono Pizza that serves pizza in a cone. Pizza. In a cone.
New Jersey has some of the country’s best Italian fast food. There’s a mom-and-pop pizzeria in just about every strip mall. You can buy a $2.50 slice or a $14 pie as big as a manhole cover: delicious with a fragrant, firm, yeasty crust that stands up to generous amounts of delicately seasoned marinara and gobs of salty mozzarella, plus whatever toppings you please (unless you’re into freaky things like sweet corn and shrimp. If that’s the case, you can just get on the Turnpike, get off at Newark Airport and fly back to wherever they think that kind of thing is okay). But fast food chains are also ubiquitous, and we have Domino’s and Little Caesars, which has never made any sense to me. So it’s Kono Pizza’s turn to pitch up and give it a try. Okay, why not? Continue reading
Thanks to some ill-advised attempts to obtain a pair of shoes, I’ve been summonsed here among you, to dole out compliments and wisecracks about the comments you post here, in such a self-aggrandizing way.
I have put on my court-mandated orange vest and will now begin my community service sentence, which requires me to read everything you’re posting for the past week. You’d best entertain me or I will look into my crystal ball and see who’s going to turn into a flying monkey in the near future! Continue reading
If you’re looking for a natural-looking lip product that also adds protection to your lips and has a lovely scent, Vaseline Lip Therapy in Rosy Lips is an excellent drug store product to consider. It adds a subtle pink tint to your lips and smells absolutely divine, with a light rose and herbal scent. This is a new (to the US) scent to the current line-up of Vaseline Lip Therapy products you can find at most drugstores. (The UK has had this product for a while, but it is packaged in a small tin instead of a tiny plastic tub.) Continue reading
So by now, you all know that I love booze. I’ll really drink most liquor. I’ll draw the line at the flavored shit though.
My first love is bourbon. It was introduced to me during my days of bartending at of all places TGIFridays. So yeah, I went there. I got fired from my quirky, small town bar because the owner was a freaking coke-head maniac (he ended up firing me 5 times) and I needed work. Part of my flaired fueled conditional employment was having a liquor salesmen come in before our shifts and educate us on types of liquor so we could better sell their brands. So okay, I’ll sport Flair for a 10 am Bourbon tasting. Continue reading
It was good, clever, and probably better than you would expect. Continue reading
I love movies. More importantly, I love seeing movies before almost everyone else. Certain movies will get me to the theater at midnight, so I figured I’d see them first and write a review the next day so you can get a real review from someone that isn’t a Hollywood hack.
In this installment… The Avengers. There will be spoilers. Continue reading
In 2007, BioWare released Mass Effect, the first game in a new epic trilogy of action/RPG games. In 2010, they released Mass Effect 2, the second much-anticipated installment, to rave reviews. A week ago, they released Mass Effect 3, the epic conclusion to the trilogy.
Unfortunately, as many gamers have discovered, the galaxy does not end with a bang, but rather, with a very disappointing whimper.
NOTE: THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS OF MASS EFFECT 3, SPECIFICALLY THE ENDING. DO NOT READ IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE SPOILED. CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED.
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The Adventures of Tintin, directed by Steven Spielberg, is essentially an Indiana Jones cartoon without Indiana Jones. Imagine that in the last Indiana Jones movie, greaser Shia LeBoeuf is replaced with a pleasant, studious red-haired kid who’s being chased by Russians. Then, in a sequel, which involves pirates and treasure instead of goddamned crystal skulls, Indiana Jones just never shows up. It’s ok, though, because you don’t really miss him. There’s a chase through a market that looks a lot like the one in “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” so maybe you miss him a little bit there, but otherwise, no. Continue reading