The Adventures of Tintin, directed by Steven Spielberg, is essentially an Indiana Jones cartoon without Indiana Jones. Imagine that in the last Indiana Jones movie, greaser Shia LeBoeuf is replaced with a pleasant, studious red-haired kid who’s being chased by Russians. Then, in a sequel, which involves pirates and treasure instead of goddamned crystal skulls, Indiana Jones just never shows up. It’s ok, though, because you don’t really miss him. There’s a chase through a market that looks a lot like the one in “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” so maybe you miss him a little bit there, but otherwise, no. Continue reading