Daily Archives: March 29, 2011

15 posts

My Explicit Life – SFW

Sex is my hobby.

Not so much the having of it (lingering Catholic damage and a significant aversion to germs and off-spring killed any chance for promiscuity for me at an early age). But I am fascinated by the vast variety of ways humans have divined to get off. My “research” has taken me to some really interesting places and some really dark places, but all of it has been. . . rewarding.

My special interest is in pornography.

I’ve seen at least a few films from all genres that are not on-their-face disturbing (you know it when you hear about it) or illegal. To list just the kink genres alone would be a post in itself, so I will refrain. Remember Rule 34.

Let’s just say that I’ve done the leg work.

My pornographic life has seen its fair share of internal and external conflict. A common critique  I receive (usually screamed at me after too many beers), particularly from my female friends, is that all porn exploits and degrades women; that there is no way the porn industry isn’t damaging the women participating and all women in general. I respect this opinion. I was once even persuaded by that opinion but as I have experienced more and branched out (way out) from the Vivid/Hustler/Playboy worlds of porn and seen some truly amazing (and H-O-T) work being done by smart women who are deeply committed to forwarding a feminist viewpoint in their work, I changed my mind. So, while I still agree that a significant portion of the business remains deeply misogynistic, I think it is an unfair and inaccurate picture of the entire industry.

I started this post thinking that I would make some recommendations about some excellent and incredibly hot work going on that you may not have heard of if your own pornographic life is restricted to X-Tube, pay-per-view, or trolling for whatever free genitals are bumping and grinding their way around the interwebz. But Lux Alptraum and the staff at Fleshbot (link is NSFW) have that covered and I cannot improve upon their work.

So instead I’d like to impart the some of the lessons I’ve learned about real-life sex after 10+ years (the beginning of my pornographic life was, technically speaking, illegal) of watching people have sex on camera.

Even if you are extremely porn-adverse, I think these lessons will translate. They are from the perspective of a straight woman (not on behalf all straight women). While I’d like to think they translate across orientations and genders, I don’t want to make any assumptions.

  • Nobody looks “cute” with their ankles next to their ears. Even the hottest of porn stars (Bobbi Starr and Junior Stellano – links NSFW) look silly. Sex, even on-camera sex, is not about looking pretty. It’s about having a good time. The best porn, while still porn (meaning that the positions are inventive, acrobatic, and cheated to the camera), is about two people enjoying the shit out of each other. It is not about posing or faking it for the viewing audience. Your sex shouldn’t be either. Regardless of who you are fucking and how “hot” that person is, if they are blowing the top of your head off, they will not care what your thighs, stomach, or sweaty, red face looks like in that particular position (unless they are a total piece of shit). Getting someone off is way more of a turn-on than a perfectly posed and composed body (as if there is such a thing).
  • Have a loose plan before you dive in. Believe it or not, porn, like any other film, has a script. That script mostly consists of a position-by-position breakdown. There are innumerable benefits to coming up with your own “script” for how exactly you are going to go about turning your partner into boneless puddle of goo. Not only does the anticipation kick the experience up about 100 notches, both of you will also feel more secure and prepared for what is about to come (pun intended). Surprises and spontaneity can be fun but they can also be disconcerting and doing it that way all the time can breed repetition and boredom. It also tends to remove an element of participation from the less spontaneous partner. Planning also helps remove any uncertainty about consent and help insure that no one feels overwhelmed, taken advantage of or for granted.
  • Talk! Talk about your sex before you have it (the “script”)! Talk about your sex after you have it (see if the “script” was successful)! If it’s your thing, talk about the sex while you are having it! Good porn is extremely communicative. Maybe the actors aren’t exactly using SAT words but questions are asked and answered and the status updates are constant. As a female viewer, that is perhaps the hottest part of the entire viewing experience.
  • Lastly, an orifice, is an orifice, is an orifice, is an orifice. From magazines, advertisements for bizarre products and services, and my own friends I get the sense that a LOT of people worry about about the appearance of their anuses and vaginas. While I won’t go so far as to say all that shit looks exactly the same (honestly, to me it does. I couldn’t pick my own vagina out of a line-up.) but essentially we are all working with the same stuff. The surprises are few. Also, not to be harsh about porn actors, but they are not the best actor-actors. I’m pretty good at catching nuances in facial expression and in all the porn I’ve watched, from all walks of porn life, I have never seen an actor show even the slightest sign of freaking out at the sight of a particular orifice. All I’ve seen, in all the time I’ve spent in the trenches, is a person who is just happy to be allowed to visit with a particular orifice for a while. So calm down and don’t feel like you HAVE to “bleach” or “rejuvenate” anything in order to join the party.

I hope this was illuminating for a lot of you and not too pedantic for the rest of you perverts (“pervert” is a term of endearment in sexxxy circles. I use it here with the utmost respect and affection.).

If you would like some porn recommendations and do not want to go to Fleshbot, ask away in the comments!

Fake Girlfriends for Social Networks Are Now a Reality

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Do you wish you had a girlfriend to impress all your “friends” on those social networking sites, but all those online dating horror stories have driven you from finding a real girlfriend?  Well, now you can have the online girlfriend experience without all the trouble of dating and interacting with humans.  CloudGirlfriend.com will pretend to be your significant other on social networking sites for a small, but as yet undetermined fee.

The people behind the site claim your fake girlfriend will not be an automated love-bot but will be a real person.  Who knows, it might even be a girl.  She will write on your Facebook wall, tweet you sweet nothings and proclaim her love for you from the highest Tumblr.

I know what you’re thinking, wouldn’t your friends in real life wonder who this mystery woman is?  Yes, and you’ll have to lie to them.  But girls you barely know in your online social circle will think you have a girlfriend and then they’ll want to be your girlfriend too.  The science behind this is solid and you shouldn’t question it.

Source and image CNet.

Movie Review: Sucker Punch

Sucker Punch

Starring: Emily Browning, Abbey Cornish, Jena Malone, Vanessa Hudgens, Jamie Chung, Carla Gugino & Oscar Isaac
Directed by: Zach Snyder
Written by: Zach Snyder & Steve Shibuya based on a story by Zach Snyder

Zach Snyder is a director that is probably best known for his visual flair. His groundbreaking work in 300, his beautifully realized (whether you liked the actual film or not) version of Watchmen, these are what people have come to expect from Snyder. Even his earliest feature, the 2004 remake of Dawn of the Dead showed that he was a director with a vision.

However his greatest strength is also his biggest weakness. Snyder is so focused on the visual spectacle that the story gets muddled and lost on the way to its ultimate realization. In the past when he was doing a remake or working with someone else’s material this wasn’t as noticeable.  And ultimately he still pulled it off. However Sucker Punch is an entirely original film written by Snyder. And in this case that lack of focus or attention to story, plot & characterization is glaring.

It’s really no mystery at this point what Sucker Punch is about. The studio promoted the hell out of this thing. With a price tag of around $82 million not including marketing costs they had to. So I don’t think I give anything away here by recapping briefly (though there may be some mild spoilers, you are forewarned). “Baby Doll”(Browning) is sent to a mental institution. In there she meets fellow in mates “Sweat Pea”(Cornish), “Rocket”(Malone), “Blondie”(Hudgens) & “Amber”(Chung). The hospital is run through a combination of Dr. Vera Gorski(Gugina) and head lackey/orderly Blue Jones(Isaac).

Baby Doll, who’s got a limited amount of time sort of conjures up in her mind a dreamworld where she gets a quest to free herself from the asylum. Like in the trailer we’re told she needs a map, fire, a knife, a key and some other mystery object.

The majority of the rest of the film as shown in the previews is about Baby Doll and gang trying to procure those items through her warped vision of reality. What’s actually going on back in the asylum is anyone’s guess because we don’t even see it again till the film is almost over. This is part of the problem.

I understand that films want to have “layers” of dreams or subconscious. I mean hell it worked for Inception(at least I thought it did) so why not here. We spend much more time in that “second layer” the first layer being reality. In the second layer none of them are in an insane asylum, but rather in some strange burlesque/prostitution club. It’s through this layer that we  get to the third layer which in this case is all the stuff you saw in the preview with dragons and weird steampunk zombie Nazis(which is kind of funny only because I had watched Dead Snow the night before for the first time) etc.

It all looks quite frankly for the most part pretty awesome. The action sequences are fast paced adrenaline pumping scenes. You see some really cool stuff that is very visually impressive. And you only stop and scratch your head a little bit wondering why exactly these 5 women are fighting all these things scantily clad in school girl outfits and other garb better suited for a fetish video than the alleged ass kicking they are handing out.

And then it really hits you. Because while you’re distracted by all the visual fireworks you’re not really thinking. Then wham you get sucker punched. The movie doesn’t really make any fucking sense whatsoever.

I’m sure Snyder had the best of intentions going into this. He just didn’t think things through. The idea is that Baby Doll is supposed to be getting “empowered” when she sets herself free in her mind and through that she can somehow free herself from the physical prison she’s in. What? How the hell is hallucinating your way through a smorgasbord of fanboy wet dreams equal freeing yourself? Are we to believe that Baby Doll is empowering and freeing herself by imagining herself slicing things with a katana in a school girl outfit? The very idea of it is preposterous. .

Like all good morality tales(and this kind sorta tries to be one) there is a lesson to be learned here. That lesson is apparently that Zach Snyder needs to stick to directing other people’s material. Because when it’s his own material we get flat emotionless acting, horrible dialogue and of course to hammer the same nail again an essentially incomprehensible plot. Of course wrapped up really really nice. Oh and sorry folks Jon Hamm is in the film all of five minutes; if you were going to see him, don’t.

Sucker Punch is a beautiful mess. I can’t say I’m anything less than impressed with the visuals, they are stunning and if that’s enough for you than go see it. If you’re looking for anything more save your money and see something else. I give it two beers.

Let’s Celebrate the Anniversary of the 21st Amendment

Unless you have put up ad blocker or some such thing while perusing Crasstalk, you have obviously seen the following ad:

feedthebadger

I had to postpone the tasting due to a funeral, but we now have a date: Thursday, April 7th at 8pm sharp — East Coast time natch. It is a fitting day because on April 7, 1933: Prohibition ended as Utah becomes 38th state to ratify the 21st  Amendment. Come celebrate this glorious event with a toast. You will need to purchase the wine today or tomorrow in order to participate.

Click here to read which wines were are tasting and the specifics of the program. Two key things to remember:

– Order from WineDreamer.com

– Use coupon code FEEDTHEBADGER to get 10% discount and 10% to support this website

– No code=no discount and no money for Crasstalk

Just to keep it fun, I’m also going to ask those that participate to buy the best bottle of White Zinfandel they can get their paws on as a ‘control wine’ by which we will judge all other wines we taste.   I’m personally going to go for the box of Franzia.

box wine

Arken, are you in?

Five Lessons I Learned from OKCupid

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It’s that time again.  Another day, another fizzled out semi-relationship with a guy who smelled delightfully of cigars and sweetly came up with clever nicknames for me.  And so I reactivated my OKCupid profile last week.  This got me to thinking about my previous forays into online dating, and I have provided a few select ones here so that you might laugh at me from the comfort of your strong, enduring marriages and partnerships or your basement apartments filled with cats.

I have been on many terrible dates.  Punishing dates.  But every bad one is an opportunity to learn and do better next time, no?  For the Marrieds and Coupled Ups here and various others who have managed to avoid the Seventh Circle of Hell known as match.com, I have provided a list of things that should make you feel infinitely better about yourselves.  And for the rest of you who suffer through endless OKCupid emails about your Quiver Matches (isn’t that some kind of Christian superbaby cult?) and messages from people who were never taught about the sanctity of the shift key, I want to give you some pointers and let you to know that you are not alone.  Except–wait, you are!  Otherwise you would not be online dating.

In any case, here is what I learned from a year of perpetual bad dates:

1.  A sex shop is not an acceptable venue for a first date.  This gentleman seemed quite promising!  He charmed me with his jokes and his South Side Irish strawberry-blond hair.  We could have ginger babies! This is my mother’s fondest wish—that I someday produce spawn that will be inevitably haunted by comments from evil 7th grade girls about how oh my God I can’t believe you don’t tan! and drunken twentysomething dudes desperate to know if the curtains match the drapes.

We got along swimmingly.  In any case, the subject turned to online dating.  If there is one thing I have learned from online dating, it is that men love to talk about the other men that women meet through online dating.  I cannot explain this, but virtually every man I have been on a date with has desperately wanted to know what other men who do online dating are like.  In any case, I mentioned that one of the first messages I received when I signed up was from a guy who described his love for his Fleshlight in his profile.  And this South Side Irish man claimed to have no knowledge of what this “Fleshlight” thing could be, so, being the teacher that I am, I kindly explained it to him.  Somehow this explanation led to the mention of a nearby sex toy emporium, which led to joking about visiting this sinful haven of carnal pleasure, which, two very large beers later, turned into an actual trip.  Shockingly, this relationship did not work out.  If there is one thing that Cosmo didn’t warn me about, it’s that dates that begin in a sex shop rarely end in a meaningful, satisfying relationship.

2.  Do not date men who think it is sexy to tell you that they would like to tie you up and rape you in front of your family.  It took me far longer than it should have to figure out that this fellow was an unmedicated psychopath.  Luckily, after the family-rape comment, I told him that he should perhaps never speak to me again or ever try to contact me or I would report his freaky ass to the police, and he listened.  This is also true: he had a tally next to his bed.  You know, a tally. On the wall.  In Sharpie.  He also drank all of the alcohol I had in my apartment–including the mysterious bottle that a friend brought back from China that no one else would touch.  Looking back, there were a lot of red flags with this one.

3.  Do not judge unless this person totally merits judgment.  Get out your gavels, because you are all going to judge me for this.  (I am also listening to Coldplay right now.  Judge away!)  This fellow and I did not speak on the phone before our date, but we exchanged many flirtatious emails.  He seemed so nice!  Worked in education!  We met for a drink, which became two drinks when I realized that he was unable to finish a sentence because of his severe stutter.  It seemed terribly unfair to judge someone because of a speech impediment, so I tried my best to ignore it and just focus on what he was saying.  This is where this story could take a heartwarming turn, where I learned that it was what was on the inside that counted, not the speech impediment!  But this was no after school special.  I soon realized that he worked in a part-time job, lived with his parents, and spoke with an inexplicable Jersey accent.  And not in a funny/ironic way.  In a bad way.  A very bad way.

4.  Do not be fooled by sexy accents.  This sexy British guy had such a sexy British accent!  He insisted on adding me as a Facebook friend after a couple of dates, which seemed weird at the time but, hello!  Sexy accents cover a multitude of sins!  And we discovered that we had the same birthday.  It was fate!  Except that he was screwing some other girl the whole time he was seeing me.  I discovered this when he posted photos from a trip they took together on Facebook.  Some people think that a British accent makes you sound smarter.  But do not be mistaken: a British accent does not actually make you any smarter. Especially when it comes to things like hiding your ladyfriends from one another on Facebook.  In a moment of near-instant karma, a couple of days later, his other girlfriend went snooping through his phone, found text messages from me and dumped his cheating ass.

5.  Last but not least, do not meet a man at his apartment on the second date.  This guy did improv and (because I was trying very hard not to judge– not all improv actors are self-important and insufferable!) seemed nice at first.  We had ice cream.  It was okay!  He was not too creepy, though his bug eyes did sort of weird me out.  I agreed to a second date, and I met him at his place.  He answered the door in nothing but a towel.  I could not get out of there fast enough.

I have learned a lot of lessons through online dating.  Don’t be blinded by accents or the promise of ginger babies!  Avoid improv actors at all costs!  Don’t go to sex shops on the first date!  Wait until at least the third date for that.

I’m sure I missed a few things here.  What lessons have you learned from online dating?

Rebelling Against the Fingernail Dress Code

Sinful Colors Green Ocean over OPI Jade is the New Black

If you work in an office job, you probably have to adhere to an office-dress code. Depending on your office, that might mean you can’t rock shimmery blue-green flaky glitter on your nails and you have to wear pumps. However, you can still have interesting nail polish without resorting to one of Essie’s ten thousand sheer baby pinks.

 

 

 

Vampies

Sally Hansen Complete Salon Manicure Midnight in NY

Black, or so dark it’s nearly black, nail polish is not just for goth teens anymore. Depending on your office, you can definitely rock a vampie. This look is best when you have very short nails.

China Glaze Lubu Heels

Some classic shades include:

  • Chanel Vamp
  • OPI Lincoln Park After Dark
  • Revlon Vixen
  • Wet N Wild Nocturnal (this is from the Craze line and is actually being discontinued, so it may be difficult to find but it’s a lovely dark blue with a jelly finish.)

Gray, Greige, Gravender

 

Revlon Perplex

If black is a little harsh for you, you might enjoy the relaxing world of grey, greige and gravender. These are purple-gray colors and they are very elegant looking. These are actually some of my favorite work-appropriate polishes.

China Glaze’s recent Anchor’s Away collection has a lovely polish called Below Deck which is intended to be a dupe of China Glaze’s own old-formula polish, Channelesque.

China Glaze Channelesque

If you check your local drug store, you might also find Revlon Perplex, which is a nearly exact dupe of Chanel Paradoxal.

You can also check out Sephora by OPI’s Metro Chic or Rimmel London Steel Gray. If you prefer a strict gray, try American Apparel Factory Grey or Echo Park As much as I hate American Apparel, I have nothing but love for the incredible formula on their classic cream polishes.

American Apparel Factory Grey
American Apparel Echo Park

If you have any questions about nail care or polish, please feel free to type them below and I’ll try my best to answer them in another post or in a reply.

Happy painting!

Unsung Country Funk Soul Genius: The Back Story On Singer Songwriter Jim Ford

As a singer songwriter (more on that at a later date) I have frequently been fascinated by the personal back-stories of songwriters whose work I really respect.  I really enjoy reading books like Brian Wilson’s autobiography, mostly because I like finding out the stories behind his writing of songs like “Caroline, No” and “Warmth of the Sun”.

Country-Funk Musical genius Jim Ford

It’s particularly interesting for me when I discover an artist from the past whose work I was not aware of previously.  Such is the case with Jim Ford who I just “discovered” this past weekend.

Friday night I was home doing work, and had the R&B classics channel on Fios on in the background for music.  I heard this song,  “Harry Hippie” that I had never heard before, and was instantly into it.  It is wonderfully sung by the great Bobby Womack.  But a quick Google search revealed that the writer was one Jim Ford.

Born in Kentucky in 1941, he spent time in New Orleans before making his way to L.A. and success in the music industry.  Incredibly prolific, he was at the forefront of the musical “mixed marriage” that was country-soul-rock-funk; so popular in the early 1970s.  Musical luminaries such as Nick Lowe (one of my personal all time favorites) called Jim Ford a big musical influence and a friend.  Ford’s good friend Sly Stone called him “the funkiest white man I know”.

Ford released just one solo album in his life, the somewhat unsung “Harlan County” released in 1969 on White Whale Records.  Listen to the title track, if nothing else, to see how Ford blended the various styles of American popular music with incredible finesse and excitement.  His arrangement is complex and highly satisfying; if those horn sections alone don’t get you moving, you’re just too tired to move.

Apparently he recorded a second album, set to be released in 1970 on Capitol Records.  However after some sort of dust up between Jim and some Capitol execs, they pulled the plug on the album.  He was sent on his way with $20, 000 AND his master tapes, and specific instructions never to show up in the Capitol Records building ever again.

Although his career as a solo artist was indefinitely stalled, he maintained his rock star lifestyle by writing hits that were covered by many major artists like Womack and Aretha Franklin, who shined with a bangin’ version of Ford’s  “Niki Hoeky”.  He even wrote an entire album for the Temptations, “Wings of Love” released in 1976.

If you listen to Ford’s own solo tracks, you easily understand how both his songwriting and vocal style  might have been influences to so many new artists of the time. Nick Lowe and the rest of the London pub rock scene guys were just getting started when Ford went over to London to lay some of his soul on the people. And of course Ford’s influence could be seen in all kinds of American southern rock artists.

Jim Ford claimed for years that he actually wrote or co-wrote the famous “Ode to Billy Joe”, which was singer Bobbie Gentry’s entrée to musical fame.  Gentry has always denied that Ford was involved with writing the song. The two were a couple and living together when the song was written, and sometimes songwriters living or working in close proximity can develop nebulous and conflicting perceptions of their “boundaries.” Gentry later showed that the “Billy Joe” story was something she had written up as a short story before putting it in song form, and showed early drafts of the lyrics that had many more verses than ones she finally recorded.  Places mentioned in the song like Choctaw Ridge and the Tallahatchie Bridge were real locations from her particular southern upbringing, not his.  And Gentry did go on to have artistic success and hits on her own after her breakup with Ford, shortly after the song hit. But you can see some of Ford’s style in the song too.  I believe it’s at least conceivable that while Gentry was in the process of turning her short story into the song, that Ford suggested some part of the melody line or chord structure. Was Jim hurt because she didn’t acknowledge his contribution to a huge hit, or just hurt because she left him? Only the two of them will ever know for sure.

According to this article about Jim on Aquariumdrunkard.com, after those initial years of living in the fast lane,  came a story we’ve all heard before, namely: charismatic musical genius gets lost in the world and makes friends with drugs and drinking.

He cleaned up in the early 2000’s and found himself living in a trailer, in Mendocino County, California, strewn with myriad master tapes of tons of amazing Jim Ford songs that had been recorded and never released.

This is how and where he was somehow found, lounging in obscurity, by a Swedish music magazine publisher in 2006.  Thus started the last, brief phase of his life, garnering one more bit of the spotlight for the road.

In 2007, a German indie label named Bear Family Records put out “Sounds of Our Times”, a compilation consisting of the entire “Harlan County Album” plus 15 of these unreleased tracks.

There were plans made for a subsequent album of even more of Ford’s demos (which was released in 2008 as “Point of No Return”) and old friend Nick Lowe was planning a big reunion concert for Jim in London.

But before the hoopla could ensue, it was over.  Ford was found dead in his trailer on November 18th, 2007, at the age of 66.  His neighbors were worried something was up when they noticed that he had left his Peugeot with the hood up parked in front, in the rain.  I haven’t found anything about the cause of his death online.

RIP, Jim Ford. You’ve certainly made this girl love you, and darned if you didn’t make it “out of Harlan County.”

15 Unusual Phobias

We all have bizarre idiosyncrasies, strange things we’re afraid of, paranoias that just seems irrational.  Have you ever wondered what it’s called?  Well, here is a completely random list of phobias that may or may not relate to you.

Phobophobia – fear of having a phobia.

So you’re afraid of being afraid, so you become even more afraid, causing you to become even more afraid of being afraid than you were in the first place, and so on.  It’s like a dream within a dream within another dream, within a movie screen.  Only not really.

Agyrophobia – fear of crossing roads..

What about jokes about crossing roads?  Why did the chicken cross the “AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!”  No?  OK.

Anthophobia – fear of flowers.

I don’t understand – this seems perfectly natural.

I wasn't afraid of flowers until just now.

Ablutophobia– fear of bathing, washing, or cleaning..

I believe this is the patron phobia among hermits.  I love taking showers and being clean, but I hate picking up after myself.  Can I be considered partially ablutophobic?   Would it be called hemi-ablutophobic?

Chorophobia – fear of dancing.

Well, some people just shouldn’t dance anyway.

Um…

Now I’m afraid of dancing.

Somniphobia – fear of sleep.

I just can’t even conceive of that.  Sleep is what I do when shit has hit the fan and I’ve been exhausted by stress.  Sleep is a sweet, sweet escape from the world.  I am most definitely pro-sleep.

Ergasiophobia, Ergophobia – fear of work or functioning, or a surgeon’s fear of operating.

Seriously?  “Sorry  boss, can’t come in today, I have Ergophobia.  Yeah, it’s a thing.”

Of course surgeons could be imagining this.

Well if it isn't my old friend Mr McCreg. With a leg for an arm, and an arm for a leg!

Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia – fear of the number 666.

I’m afraid of words of that length.  What’s that called?

Kinemortophobia – fear of the undead, specifically zombies.

Who wouldn’t be afraid of zombies?  Are there some sort of warm fuzzy zombies that bake pies and give back massages I haven’t heard about that most people wouldn’t be afraid of?

OK, this one is kind of adorable.

Koumpounophobia – fear of sewing buttons.

What about sewing on snaps?  Hemming something?  Having buttons thrown at you?  I need more information!

Nomatophobia – fear of names.

But…. Why does it have a name?

Oikophobia – fear of home surroundings and household appliances.

“Home surroundings”?  As in walls?  Or just your toaster?  In which case, I understand.

Not technically a toaster...

Paraskavedekatriaphobia, Paraskevidekatriaphobia, Friggatriskaidekaphobia – fear of Friday the 13th.

These names have to be made up.  They probably are – I’ll admit my research was minimal.

Tetraphobia – fear of the number 4.

This must have made being a Brett Favre fan rather difficult.  John Madden most definitely does not have this phobia.

I have a phobia of this guy.

Coulrophobia – fear of clowns (not restricted to evil clowns).

Does anyone actually like clowns?  How about this – who would you rather have direct contact with; a dentist or a clown?

Exception to the rule?  Fizbo. Thus is the power of Cameron, of Modern Family.

Fizbo

So what did I miss?  Feel free to add to the list with your own favorite phobia.   My real phobia, which I didn’t even know was a thing until a few weeks ago?  Trypophobia – I just went to google image it to share pictures, and it just about made me cry.  So, no visuals for that one (at least not from me).

Until next time!

MP

NY Times Paywall Goes Up, 4 Lines of Code Make it Go Down

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The NYTimes implemented their long-discussed “paywall” today, in an attempt to make some money on online viewers. Unlike proposed paywalls designed by the folks at Fox News and The Guardian, this paywall is “loose by design.” What that means is that you’re still able to view up to 20 stories online per day, and they purposely did not make it hard to circumvent their system.

So why would a newspaper not make their paywall ultra-secure? Quite simply, they’re smart. In independent studies done by organizations not affiliated with content producers (basically any University study and nothing by the MPAA, RIAA, etc) researchers have found that people only pirate things they can’t afford. When products are priced too high, piracy increases, and oftentimes it deters people from purchasing legit versions. Microsoft released Windows Vista in China and priced it at about $180 USD. The Chinese version of XP was priced at about $20. A month after Vista’s release, Microsoft had only sold a total of seven copies of Vista in all of China. Windows XP, being a much more affordable product, sold in the tens of thousands of copies. When Microsoft dropped the price of XP to $20, the number of pirated copies dropped significantly, to the point that it was easier in the long term to purchase a legit version of XP than buy a pirated version (for a tenth of the cost.) The same thing happens with music and movies. Studios have realized that in Asian markets they can’t market legit DVD’s at American prices. They now sell “Region 5 DVD’s” for about $3USD. As a result, Chinese pirates aren’t bootlegging any DVD’s released as a “Region 5.”

The New York times is also pretty much THE place for news online. If they locked down their paywall, sites would stop linking to their stories, and they’d lose readers. Its in their interest to maintain their userbase at the expense of a couple of paywall subscriptions.

The last factor comes down to development cost. The NYTimes would basically have to re-vamp their website to program in serious DRM. By applying a “loose” paywall, they didn’t have to spend millions on re-doing their website.

Even though its pretty cheap, and even though you get 20 free stories, people have released hacks for the NYTimes site. Pay for your digital subscriptions, or better yet pay for home delivery. For those of you who are eating stewed tomatoes every night and stealing wi-fi from your neighbors, you can drag and drop the NYCLEAN bookmarklet to your bookmarks toolbar and read all of the articles for free.

(on programmer’s note, 4 lines of code!)