Breaking: Well, would you look at that! Finger pointing! Deflection! The creator of the 9-9-9 Pizza Tax Plan and Free Soda With Every Tax Increase, has just named a Rick Perry Advisor as the leak behind his growing sexual harassment scandal.
Daily Archives: November 2, 2011
10 posts
The days of anonymously spouting off vitriolic hate over the internet may be closer to an end than we all realize.
Soo, have you heard, Lindsay Lohan, our own special Cocaine Polly Pocket got herself thrown back in the slammer today? Egad! “You’ve got to be kidding. You don’t mean Lindsay Lohan — Freckle Hobo and Walking Millennial Nightmare — Lindsay Lohan, do you?” Of course that’s who we mean.
Yeah, apparently, LiLo will spend the lifecycle of a gnat in lockup.
Presented for you, the beloved crassholes (all editing mistakes are the original author’s).
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Hey, remember the 90’s and Bill Clinton signing the North American Free Trade Agreement (NAFTA)? Remember how offshoring and outsourcing were going to lift all our boats and send all the grungy no good very bad jobs somewhere else, so we would all end up as total glam rock stars lounging about in Herman Miller office chairs at ergonomic workstations, taking Very Important calls and meetings, becoming the information workers of the future?
Yeah, me neither. Offshoring (moving jobs to another country) and outsourcing (moving business functions like Information Technology to another company, because they are deemed not critical to a company’s core business) had the spiffy side effect of creating a poorly received sitcom on NBC which featured thinly veiled racism, as well as knocking the bottom rung off the ladder of the American workplace. Continue reading
I was bullied horribly and it was terrible. It’s not something I talk about. I turn forty this month and I still have not talked about this to anyone other than my mother and sister. My mother’s gone and my sister generously does not bring it up. I buried it in the back of my mind and deliberately didn’t think of it until I had children of my own and watched the social game begin. Continue reading
We’ve all heard of degrees Celsius, meters, yards and other units of measurement. Bryan Forbes has come up with an innovative way to measure time in a relationship. A “Kardashian” represents a unit of measure representing 72 days of marriage.
For those married Crasstalkers, check out this calculator and report back your Kardashian duration. Please feel free to share your views on how this heterosexual marriage better preserves the sanctity of marriage versus same sex marriage.
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In the fall of 2000, at the start of its sixth season, Madtv added Stephnie Weir to their cast as a featured performer. A Texas native and Chicago transplant, former Improv Olympic and Second City performer, Weir was ready for the big time.
During her six year tenure on the show, Weir created characters like Dot, an average yet hyperactive young girl, whose twin (usually played by Alex Borstein) was overwhelmingly brilliant. The comparison of the brilliant sister and Dot’s upbeat normality offered moments of comedy gold. Another recurring character was Dr. Kylie Johnson, a Harvard grad who seemed to be able to handle any medical situation, from infertility to puberty to breast augmentation. Dr. Kylie’s frequent references to her past party life and subtle yet pointed digs at her patients’ shortcomings made her likable as well as hilarious. Weir’s impersonation of Anna Nicole Smith, another recurring character on the show, allowed her to truly run amok. She took Smith’s drug-fueled public persona and amped it up to Brobdingnagian proportions. Continue reading
It’s likely that before the champagne could even dry into the carpet of the St. Louis Cardinals’ clubhouse Friday night, at least a few minds had turned to the elephant in the room. The right-handed hitting, Gold Glove, MVP-Award winning elephant named Albert Pujols.
Here’s an OT with a picture and everything. Continue reading