If you’re anything like me, you probably like Christmas music, but are sick of hearing the same verse of “Jingle Bells” done over and over again, as well as the latest group of teen boys singing “Deck the Halls” or mangling the words to the “Twelve Days of Christmas.” Well, I’m here to help you out. You see, there have been centuries of beautiful Christmas music that no one sings anymore. Maybe not no one, but these treasures tend to remain hidden until someone like Enya dusts them off for her next Christmas album, or some random pop “star” does really shitty renditions of them. Continue reading
music
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When the music industry is failing and no one is buying CDs the solution is always to charge more money. It worked for Abercrombie and Fitch earlier this decade right? Oh wait…
When the content creators are asking you to charge less money and willing to take the pay cut the solution is always to charge more. It’s worked really well for the airlines right? Oh wait… Continue reading
While Newsbunny has been locked in a room, watching The Grinch Who Stole Christmas, 24/7 until her heart grows two sizes larger, I will counter her list of the worst Christmas songs with the best of Christmas cheer. Continue reading
Oh, Newsbunny, I know you’re thinking — can’t we kick off the holiday season in a joyous fashion?
C’mon, guys, you know me better than that. Continue reading
Tonight all of music’s greats will come out to win a large pyramid and maybe warble a few tunes live. We’ll forget that the AMA’s are sort of like the boring cousin of the music industry. You love them sort of, but really you want to put your finger in its ear and call it lame. Anyhoo! There will be a Katy Perry pink cupcake person! Justin Bieber, twelve year-old singer and former accused baby daddy, will Christmas everyone with song! Nicki Minaj probably wearing a windmill on her assets will do that thing she does! Should be fun or a disaster!
Let’s get drunk on Sunday night! This is the American Music Award code name. Red carpet 7-8pm Est. Live show from 8-11pm Est.
Singer-songwriter Feist played at Chicago’s Riviera Theater on November 4. Never before have I been to a concert that made me want to fall asleep until this one. Despite being a little tired from the week, I was ready to rock.
In every other concert I’ve been to the headliner usually comes out with one of their faster songs to get the crowd ready to jam out for the next hour or so. Not so with Feist. She played a slow song followed by another slow song and then another and another and it went on like that for the next 45 minutes until she played “My Moon, My Man” from her 2007 album The Reminder. Standing in the middle of the middle level would seem like an ideal place to take advantage of a venues acoustics, but this was not so with this concert. Continue reading
There is a theory being floated that the major labels are in collusion about the fate of the compact disc. If the rumors are to be believed 2012 will see the end of the CD and maybe the end of the world, though the two seem unrelated. Continue reading
After ten hours of deliberation, the jury unanimously found Conrad Murray guilty of involuntary manslaughter in the death of Michael Jackson.
Where were you when you heard gestational zygote, Justin Bieber, may have tinkled his genetic material into the lady-haven of some random fan while shouting profanity and mashing hangy-bits in the Taj Mahal of bathrooms at the Staples Center in LA — thusly impregnating her with — I dunno Hubba Bubba gum and an embryo? Bieber fans called Bieliebers, like that movie about voodoo zombies and witchcraft, have taken to Twitter to unleash hell on Bieber’s Potential Baby Mama, Mariah Yeater.
You know how Christian fundamentalists are always going on about how Halloween is an evil pagan holiday that glorifies Satan and tempts children toward the path of eternal damnation? The usual response from, you know, normal people is to be like “chill out, it’s just an excuse for kids to dress up and extort some candy from old people.” But my questions is: why would you want to deny Halloween’s badass nature? I mean, sure, we have a day honoring zombie resurrection, and a day that celebrates slaughtering a bunch of people and taking their land. But Halloween is the only holiday that’s based on an ancient festival named after Glenn Danzig’s second-coolest band and that encourages girls to dress up like slutty witches (who, as we know, were all about kinky devil sex). So the fundamentalists are actually right on this one: Halloween is evil, Satanic, and totally freaking awesome. Show our religious friends you agree by blasting these songs as loud as you can, preferably near a church.
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