The First World War ended when the Treaty of Versailles was signed in June of 1919. The fighting, however, ended several months earlier — with hostilities ending between the Allies and Germany on the eleventh hour, of the eleventh day, of the eleventh month. The picture above was taken at 10:58 AM on November Eleventh, 1918, two minutes before the cease-fire that effectively ended World War I went into effect.
According to the Department of Veterans Affairs, President Woodrow Wilson in 1919 declared November 11th to be a day to remember the Armistice, saying: “To us in America, the reflections of Armistice Day will be filled with solemn pride in the heroism of those who died in the country’s service and with gratitude for the victory, both because of the thing from which it has freed us and because of the opportunity it has given America to show her sympathy with peace and justice in the councils of the nations.” Continue reading →
Seriously. What. The. Hell. My staple for years was to go to the store, spend hours trying to decide which DVD/VHS tape my dad would appreciate the most that year. I was the king of figuring out what movie each person in my family needed to see for every holiday. I learned better. This is why you don’t buy your Dad a movie on Father’s Day. Continue reading →
The Easter holiday in Sweden is different, to say the least. Small children (girls and boys) get dressed up as påskkärringar (Easter witches, or bitches) on Easter Eve (the Saturday afternoon after Good Friday). They dress in old worn out clothes, cover their heads with scarves or old dishtowels, put on exaggerated ugly face makeup, and visit family members or neighbors in the hopes of getting some candy or coins in exchange for giving out a Good Easter card or sometimes a small drawing they made. It’s a bit similar to what Halloween is like here in the US. Continue reading →
One week from today, my home will be filling up with the smells of Seder dinner. Chicken soup will be simmering on the stove. Brisket will be roasting in the oven. The food processor will be chopping up apples and walnuts. My husband will be snacking on macaroons.
What is a Seder Dinner?
The Seder dinner is a tradition for the first night, or for some people the first two nights, of Passover. Seder, which is a Hebrew word meaning order, is an evening of rituals, such as eating matzo and bitter herbs, drinking four cups of wine (many of us have adapted that ritual to four sips), telling the story of Exodus and eating the Seder meal.
Yehuda Matzos: flickr
During the Seder, and the following eight days of Passover, we remember the Exodus when our ancestors escaped from being slaves in Egypt. We eat matzo and refrain from eating other grains because our ancestors did not have time to let their bread rise. We eat bitter herbs to remember the bitterness in their lives. We eat charoset to remember the mortar they used to build the pyramids.
What Is Not Eaten?
I could write an entire post on what is or is not kosher for Passover. This is the quick overview.
The foods that can not be eaten on Passover are called chametz: wheat, spelt, oats, barley, and rye. Many Jewish people of European descent, including me, also do not eat kitniyot: corn, rice, legumes and some seeds. The reason? The quick answer is we deny ourselves foods our ancestors were not able to eat during the Exodus and the only food containing grain we eat is matzo. Matzo is unleavened bread, almost like a large cracker, made from only flour and water and baked for less than 18 minutes. Matzo can be ground into matzo meal to be used in many recipes during Passover. A fine matzo meal is similar to a course flour, while a course matzo meal is similar to bread crumbs. There are a few reasons many of us refrain from eating kitniyot, but it is basically to prevent accidentally eating chametz.
Many Jewish people who do not keep regularly keep kosher follow the general rules of Kashrut, dietary law, during Passover. That means we do not eat pork or other meat from animals with cloven hooves that chew their cud. We do not mix meat and dairy. We only eat seafood that has fins and scales, which means we do not eat shellfish. This website has a good overview.
Seder Plate: flickr
Some Traditional Recipes
I am sharing with you a few of my favorite traditional Passover recipes. I’ll be making these and many other foods for my Seder dinner. Please share your own favorites in the comments. Maybe you can help me decide what side dish is missing from my menu.
My Mom’s Chicken Soup
Whether you are making this soup for Passover or just everyday enjoyment, the recipe depends on using kosher chickens. Kosher chickens are soaked and salted before packaging and that makes a significant difference in the taste.
Makes 12 cups of soup
2 kosher chickens, each 3 lbs plus, cut into quarters (include the neck and any organs – they will add lots of flavor)
About 14 cups water
3 large carrots, cleaned and cut in thirds
1 large white turnip, cleaned not peeled; cut in half
1 large parsnip. cleaned
4 stalks celery, each cut in half
1 whole onion, peeled
3 leeks
1-1/2 bunch parsley
1 -1/2 bunch dill
Salt to taste (about 2 teaspoons to one tablespoon)
Clean chicken thoroughly. Cut away excess fat and discard. Pour boiling water over chickens prior to putting in pot. Put chickens in a large stock pot and pour water up to about ¼ of an inch over the chickens. Bring to a boil and skim off fat and scum during the first 10 minutes of boiling. Lower heat to allow stock to simmer. After one hour, remove about half the chicken. (This chicken will make great chicken salad, the chicken that cooks the whole time will have lost most its flavor.) Add carrots, white turnip and parsnip. Bring back to boil, lower heat and simmer for 10 minutes before adding celery, onion and leeks. Bring to a boil once again, lower heat and simmer for another 10 minutes before adding parsley and dill. Bring to a boil for a final time and simmer for 30 minutes.
Strain the soup before serving so you have a clear broth. I strain it from the ladle as I pour each bowl. In my family, we serve the soup with one large matzo ball and a piece of carrot. Some people like to shred some of the chicken and add it to the soup. As a child, it was a treat to get the neck or the gizzards.
4 apples, cored and cut into 1 inch chunks (many people peel the apples, but why cut away all that fiber?)
1 cup chopped or ground walnuts
2 teaspoons cinnamon
6 teaspoons kosher red wine or grape juice
Put all ingredients in a food processor and pulse until very finely chopped. Ideally, the charoset should resemble a chunky mortar, as it should remind us of the mortars used to build the Egyptian pyramids. Some people prefer a chunkier charoset.
Charoset is my favorite Passover food. Every Passover, I wonder why I don’t make charoset throughout the year. It is simple and delicious. But I know that, in my heart, I want to keep charoset special so I only allow myself the cinnamon apple goodness during the eight days of Passover.
Bring eggs to room temperature. Whip eggs, a pinch of salt and vanilla until they stiffen. Add sugar in three parts and continue to whip until very stiff. Fold in the coconut, being very careful not to over mix. You want to keep the mixture as light and fluffy as possible.
Line two cookie sheets with parchment paper. Drop batter onto paper using a teaspoon. Bake at 350 degrees for about 20 minutes, checking periodically to makes sure they do not burn. You want a nice golden color on the top, but the cookie won’t be too firm.
In a double broiler, or a metal bowl over a pot of about 2 inches slightly bowling water, melt the chocolate chips with the shortening. Dip the cookies in the chocolate so the chocolate covers about half the cookie and let dry on parchment paper.
(Special thanks to DahlELama for making sure this Reform Penguin didn’t make any mistakes)
St Paddy’s Day is a funny thing. I won’t even tackle what ‘being Irish’ means because it is an impossible subject. However – suffice to say – on March 17th, being Irish means wearing green, saying ‘yee’ instead of ‘you’, ‘tis’ instead of ‘this’, drinking copious amounts of (green) alcohol and asking people to kiss you. Apparently. Just look at Kittay O’Noes here. Authenticity is out the window. This is okay I suppose and kinda nice in a way – because everyone celebrates Irish culture all over the world.
I know a lot of this article will be super-obvious to polite, cosmopolitan people (which I assume make up the majority of Crasstalkers) – but I speak from experience. These issues crop up. People can be very generous to the native Celts but it can be overwhelming. So let’s make things easy for both sides …
Don’t call it ST PATTY’S DAY. Patty is a girl’s name. She is a character in Peanuts. Paddy is the abbreviation for Patrick.
Do be glad you aren’t alone. The Irish historically sowed their oats. Colin Farrell continues this trend as we speak. Therefore every other person across the planet appears to have an Irish ancestor or friend. Heal the world. Michael would have wanted that.
Do be aware that to most of the world – Irish people come from Ireland. This is whom I mean when I say “Irish”. I know American cultural dialogue about heritages is mostly internal. It is easy to omit the clarifying “Irish-suffix”. But when speaking to someone from Ireland; include it as a courtesy
Don’t spend too much time talking about dead people from 150 years ago. Yes I’m looking at you – Conan O’Brien. Same goes for all those old ‘granny proverbs’ that are apparently ‘Irish’ but are mostly found on tea towels or t-shirts. They are probably all made up bollocks anyway.
Do show an interest in modern Ireland. Family lore is interesting but only takes you so far with strangers. Ireland is a very pragmatic country and only really foreigners are sentimental about it. The weather keeps you down to earth anyway. Ask questions. Be honest if you don’t know enough. It will help break the ice and take you a lot further than nostalgia.
Don’t go on about personal traits you consider “Irish” (e.g. looks, physical features or personality traits). People from Ireland and elsewhere may not see it the same. You may look like something completely different to them. And what is ‘Irish looking’ anyway? Julianna Margulies could pass very easily for a local in Dublin or Galway but she isn’t at all. Irish-Americans come in many forms too – and often don’t look remotely ‘Irish’. It just doesn’t matter anymore.
Do be complimentary about accents in a subtle fashion. You want to hear some? Try some Fassbender. But gushing and asking people to say things for your amusement is too much. Just sit back and listen. People will talk more if they think they aren’t on show. Nobody wants to be a performing monkey. You may think they have lovely hair too – but would you mention it every 5 minutes?
Don’t for the love of St Bono –mimic a person’s voice or do your own impression without specific prompting. This is only funny if you know the person well! Most people will smile nicely and nod – others may tell you to fuck off. You don’t want that. But it happens to people with accents all the time. Dylan explains – although he seems to confuse “English” with “Ray Winstone” or some weird drunk person from London whom I don’t recognize. Believe me – it isn’t just the English.
Don’t approach native people with the saying “Top O’ The Morning”, “Begorrah” and any other stupid phrases nobody uses. It is like going up to Salma Hayek and saying ‘ay ay ay arrrrrrrriba’ whilst making gun noises. We will resign these words to the box marked ARSEBISCUITS.
Don’t bear grudges on St Paddy’s Day. The holiday is not about that. This includes having a swipe at other ethnicities within your country. Being positive about Irish identity is not the same as being negative about anyone else. Remember the 19th century was shitty for many people – not just in the Irish diaspora. And none of us were actually there to remember these hard times.
Don’t get your cultural and historical knowledge from stupid stereotypes or slushy ballads. Know your stuff or other people will call you on it. Particularly with politics. Relations between both UK and Ireland are probably more cordial now than ever before. Northern Ireland has had it’s own assembly for some time and is basically self-governed in a lot of ways. The terrorist ceasefire holds. Nobody wants the violence back.
Do be aware of recent historic upsets and developments. Unfortunately, bombs don’t recognise nationalities and many innocent people were killed, maimed or scarred for life during the last forty years. Remember most of the money for terrorism came from misguided or hateful people – and a lot from overseas like Mr Libya. Maybe even from your country – victims are still waiting for apologies from many quarters. Something to think about if anyone asks you do you to drink a hilarious cocktail called an ‘Irish car bomb’. The Omagh bomb was only in 1998. It’s not a fucking joke to many. ‘Black and Tan’ is another one. If you think that is being over-sensitive, then you are probably very far away from the reality. Lucky you.
Don’t fall for the ‘Greenface’ – meaning leprechaun jokes and imagery. Same for hilarious mascots and stereotypes you see at sports games or elsewhere like on TV shows. The view that Irish women are flame-haired temptress ‘colleens’ (ugh – like ‘Jewess’ that term seriously has to go away) has more to do with Maureen O’Hara than anyone else. People from Scotland and some parts of Scandinavia are just as likely to be redheads. These negative images of Irish people derive from nasty 19th century pro-Eugenics propaganda that ridiculed the Irish as the “white negro”. They were meant to be degrading. So keep the shamrock-tattoo fakery silly hats to a minimum. Or you must then to go to the max – like yer man here. Work it – or leave it.
Do become familiar with Irish comedy and TV and films and music. Know that faux-Celtic rock bands like Dropkick Murphys (who aren’t even Irish-Americans) and Flogging Molly are basically a joke in Ireland. Nothing wrong with liking such music – just don’t assume Irish people do. Modern Ireland has a greater reverence for American music, in fact. Hip-hop, soul, R&B and rockabilly (see Imelda-May) are very popular. The film The Commitments summed up this feeling very much. And of course there is – Van the man.
Do make some new friends! Because Irish passport holders are universal – especially in these times of economic heartbreak – there is a strong chance that you might bump into an actual home-world Celt during celebrations. Hopefully, it will be someone cute with an accent that turns you to jelly. Or even something more! Just relax and enjoy the craic.
Well, it is that time of year again. Even those of us who don’t regularly indulge usually toss a couple back, and for those of us who do it can often end like this:
No matter how good our intentions, New Year’s Eve is an invitation to taunt the liquor gods, and that means paying the price the next day. In the spirit of kindness, I am posting my time honored method of easing the hangover pain so that the first day of your new year won’t be utterly painful.
I know that there are many so called “natural” and vitamin remedies that are supposed to help a hangover, but they are all bullshit. Hippies don’t know shit about drinking, put down the crystal and let a professional help you.
Get all of this stuff together tonight. Once you are in the throes of a hangover you won’t want to leave the house and you probably shouldn’t because you will look like shit anyway.
For this method you will need the following:
36 oz. of water
2 anti-inflammatory tablets of your choice (I like Alleve).
2 pieces of bread
2 grams of decent weed
One comfy pillow and blanket
A cable TV hookup or a Netflix account
Phone number to a good pizza place or really good leftovers that are easy to reheat
2 cans of Coca-Cola (absolutely no substitutions on this)
The Night Before
It goes without saying that you can avoid this by not drinking excessively in the first place, but that is for little girls and it is a long time until the MLK weekend, so fuck it. I can also tell you to stick to one type of liquor, but you inevitably will mix bourbon with champagne and will end up doing a shot of absinthe that someone brought back from a holiday in Europe. Again, fuck it. You should drink some water before you go to bed, but if given the chance to get some nasty from whomever you wind up with, skip the water and go for the sweet loving. Rest easy knowing that you will survive the consequences of your foolish behavior. Again …
The Day of Battle
Step #1: Try not to sleep more than a couple hours later than your usually waking time because that makes your body confused and you’ve already pissed it off enough. If you are sleep deprived you can nap later.
Step #2: Shower, or at least wash your face. You smell awful.
Step #3: Drink one of the Cokes. It should be ice cold. Drink it slow.
Step #4: After 15 minutes, toast the bread and eat it (use butter if your stomach isn’t too upset). Drink 12 oz. of water with it.
Step #5: Wait about 20 minutes. Smoke some weed. If you smoke cigarettes you should have one at this point. I know, I know, you are going to quit, but today is not the day. Leave that shit for next week.
Step #6: Now is the time to take a tylenol or whatever. Your stomach will appreciate that you waited.
Step #7: Watch a couple of hours of TV while snuggled in your blankey on the couch. I recommend Law and Order, Futurama, the Twilight Zone, or Star Trek. All of these will probably be on marathons tomorrow or you can get them on Netflix. Avoid porn, horror movies (this is not the time to finally see Hostel), anything really sad (alcohol is a depressant). If you must watch sports you are going to have to choke down a couple of cans of mid-priced domestic beer to make watching your favorite team blow another great season possible.
Step #8: Take a nice nap. Try to keep it under an hour so you won’t fuck up your sleep schedule and turn into a vampire.
Step #9: Take the second anti-inflammatory with 12 more oz. of water. Return to the couch for more movies (maybe there is something good on Lifetime).
Step #10: Drink the last Coke and smoke some more weed. At this point you should be ok to eat some real food. Try cheese pizza, chicken soup, or pasta with a red sauce. Avoid carbonara, salad, Indian food, anything too spicy. Don’t make your stomach even angrier.
Step #11: Return to the couch and slowly drink 12 more oz. of water. See what Benson and Stabler are up to. Check in on CT and make fun of everyone else for a having a hangover.
Step #12: By this point you should be able to go on with your day, but if you can stay on the couch do it. Avoid phone calls from family, annoying internet arguments, or anything else unpleasant. This is the first day of the New Year, you have 364 more days to be irritated.
Step #13: Profit! You win at drinking. Now don’t do that again!!!
I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess you’re feeling pretty stressed out. You’re probably reading this and tracking some motherfucking holiday packages via UPS in another tab, drinking some cold-ass coffee, and hating life right now.
‘I hate the holidays’, you’ll tell your coworkers over some stale, store-bought cookies in the break room. You’ll probably spend some time fantasizing about missing your flight home and instead spending the weekend toward the bottom of a bottle of middle-shelf gin and watching Die Hard, wrapped in last year’s unfortunate Snuggie. I get it, man. I do.
But let me tell you something. The holidays? They’re fucking AWESOME. And you need to pull your head out of your ass and look around, because you’re missing out. Here’s why:
Lights and decorations and shit. Have you looked at these things lately? Not from the top of a rickety ladder you borrowed from the in-laws, clutching a staple gun and freezing your ass off. Go pile your annoying kids in the car, drive through the fucking Tim Horton’s and get yourself a peppermint hot cocoa, and drive through some big-ass festive neighborhoods. Appreciate the work that went into that shit. I don’t care if you have to pretend it’s Laser Floyd, take a minute and really look around. Your kids will probably like this, too.
Christmas carols. Bing Crosby is the man. I don’t care who you are, his rendition of White Christmas will have you shitting candy canes. Almost every version of Carol of the Bells is fucking metal, even sung by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir. And don’t even get me started on Vince Guaraldi’s A Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack. All that tree needed was a little love! Shit.
Presents. No, you greedy asshole – buying other people presents. Thoughtful presents. Sure, it’s great getting that brand-new fancy Betamax player or a swell pair of tropical-printed Jams, but the look on a kid’s face when they open up the lead-encrusted plastic cartoon gewgaw they so desperately coveted? Oh, it’ll melt your damn heart. Yes, even yours. Put down the clearance travel mug and try harder. Do it for love. Or, do it to one-up cocky old Aunt Maureen. I don’t care, but they will.
It’s a Wonderful Life. Hope you’ve got a full box of tissues, loser! This one never fails. Zuzu’s petals! Shit, I’m tearing up. I’m ok, I’m ok.
Hot motherfucking cocoa. I’m drinking one now, bitches, and it’s good.
Remember, if you’ve given this whole thing an honest try and you’re still grinchier than a Gosselin on a camping trip, there’s always New Year’s Eve. Take two Xanax, two bottles of champagne, one regrettable hookup, and a walk of shame, and call me in the morning.
There’s always next year.
The First World War ended when the Treaty of Versailles was signed in June of 1919. The fighting, however, ended several months earlier — with hostilities ending between the Allies and Germany on the eleventh hour, of the eleventh day, of the eleventh month. The picture above was taken at 10:58 AM on November Eleventh, 1918, two minutes before the cease-fire that effectively ended World War I went into effect.
No matter how good our intentions, New Year’s Eve is an invitation to taunt the liquor gods, and that means paying the price the next day. In the spirit of kindness, I am posting my time honored method of easing the hangover pain so that the first day of your new year won’t be utterly painful.
girls and it is a long time until the MLK weekend, so fuck it. I can also tell you to stick to one type of liquor, but you inevitably will mix bourbon with champagne and will end up doing a shot of absinthe that someone brought back from a holiday in Europe. Again, fuck it. You should drink some water before you go to bed, but if given the chance to get some nasty from whomever you wind up with, skip the water and go for the sweet loving. Rest easy knowing that you will survive the consequences of your foolish behavior. Again …
