Daily Archives: December 7, 2011

19 posts

The Craziest “Sports” You’ve Ever Seen!

Hello, hi. So, yawr, are you bored by football, basketball, hockey, and whatever else sweaty people do while snapping towels at each other and comparing bicep size? Is this what happens in locker rooms? Okay. So how about we examine a few sports that are just on the cusp of greatness. Like seriously in the year 2050 everyone will be like, “What? Soccer? Huh. Let’s go play Crap Canoe!” Yeah, you probably don’t want to know what Crap Canoe is. Anyway, get ready to be simply amazed at what we humans have created to pass the time. Possibly they should have just downloaded a book on a Kindle, but whatever. We’re not here to judge.

Yes, we are. Continue reading →

Sole Searcher

During winters when I was a kid, my Dad insisted we wear real, proper shoes to school.  I have no memory what type of shoes these were. Desert boots? Penny loafers, complete with shiny penny? Wee, child-sized Oxfords? No clue.  I do vividly remember, however, the footwear I was desperate to wear to school instead. The footwear my father thought too flimsy to keep our feet warm through a New Jersey winter. The footwear I put in my bag and a few blocks from home, changed into, so desperate was I to have them on my feet, always.  Sneakers. Continue reading →

Are Year Round Sports Good for Your Kids?

If I think back hard enough, I can still feel the stinging in my hands, hear the ringing in my ears.

Growing up in northwestern Pennsylvania, those attacks on your senses were something you became accustomed to if you played baseball at a competitive level. I graduated high school in 1997, on the very fringe of the movement to turn youth sports into a year-round, practice-til-you-drop affair.  Continue reading →

Baseball Has the Best Butts


What’s not to love about an athlete’s body? It’s the tool he needs to do his job so he takes great care of his tool. Yes, I said it. At the very least, we can admire and appreciate athletes’ bodies for the living machines they are. Let’s get real though: we’re not just appreciating the functionality of a well toned physique; we’re lusting after hot pieces of man meat. Soccer may have some great legs; swimming may have some amazing torsos; football may… well let’s face it, they wear so much padding you can’t see their bodies anyway (ditto for hockey). If you want to see some great asses though, you’re going to have to turn on baseball. Continue reading →

Race in Racing

Last month Runner’s World magazine did its “reader’s issue.” A lot of the stories were about the readers of the magazine instead of the running superstars that are normally featured in the magazine. One reader pointed out that it’s very rare to see a black runner on the cover of the magazine.

The editor talked about this in his monthly address at the beginning of the magazine. Lo and behold, there are mostly white runners featured on the magazine because that’s who is reading the magazine. Nearly 90% of readers are Caucasian, 5.2% are Hispanic and a very low 1.2% are African-American. With 13% of the United State population being African-American, one might hope that might be reflected in running demographics, but it is not. Continue reading →

The Scars Prove You Were There

Nobody wants to be on a first-name basis with her orthopedic surgeon.

But Will is cool. I met Will after one of my bike accidents – the first time I flipped over my handlebars, after a red-winged blackbird thought I was getting a little too close to his baby momma and pinged himself right off the front part of my helmet. If you’ve never been attacked by a red-winged blackbird, I can assure you:  the little dudes do not hold back. At first, I didn’t realize what had hit me. I hit my brakes hard, forcing my bike to buck like a wild mustang, throwing myself from the seat and over the handlebars. Continue reading →

The Five Most Resilient NFL Myths

Never listen to Phil Simms EVAR

Luckily in America we can turn on the TV device every Sunday morning and hear hours worth of misinformed brain-diarrhea analysis about what’s happening on the football field. Most of this is due to dementia-addled murderbots former players who believe that their former glory gives them special insight beyond what the pencil-necked virgins statistics experts can tell him.

So just as baseball has Joe Morgan and the “Moneyball” haters, football has Tom Jackson and Phil Simms. Let’s look at five of the most common myths that football traditionalists like to shove up our brain holes on a weekly basis. Continue reading →

Why You Should Care About Minnie Miñoso

Whether you’re a fan of sports or not, you’ve probably heard of Jackie Robinson. The first African-American to ever play in the MLB, he broke barriers and paved the way for thousands of black athletes, doing it all under the shadow of vile racism and awful treatment from opposing players. Maybe you’ve heard of Roberto Clemente, the first Latin American ballplayer to ever get elected to the Hall of Fame, widely recognized for his humanitarian efforts. Well it’s time you learned about Saturnino Orestes Armas Miñoso Arrieta, also known as Minnie Miñoso. Continue reading →