Daily Archives: June 23, 2011

14 posts

Mom Had Ooo-rah; How to Be a Real Woman

I won’t forget that spring weekday, and what happened in my 6th Grade classroom.  We were trapped inside because of the rain, and we were tearing mid-century modern room up in a way that might have made Mies van De Rohe horrified. Laughter echoed off the ceilings, and the pure joy of good kids playing ran down the halls.

I had a Whoopee Cushion, and made exuberant fart noises with it at every opportunity.  This was so not like me that my classmates were delighted and screamed with laughter.  It was so not like anyone else that our gym teacher hauled me out in the hall, slammed me up against a wall, and gave me a lecture about how “the football team” would pay for my misconduct.  What?  I wasn’t even on the football team.  His choking hand on my neck was simply stunning – no one had ever touched me that way before.  When I was disciplined at home I was simply told to leave the room.  No one had ever hit me.  My friend Andrea came out in the hall and warned the teacher – “If you hit him, you’re in Big Trouble.  And I don’t like you – never did.” Continue reading

SYTYCD Recap: A Little Birdy Named Debbie

We’d like to think that there’s no “Wayward Home for Abandoned Dancers” but if there ever had to be one, it quite possibly may be the Hollywood home of a movie icon. There at the WHFAD you’d receive three square meals, tutoring in a private ballroom, and stretch limo chauffeur service with your own personal driver, among other activities. Be sure to read the fine print, kids. Don’t you want to sponsor an Abandoned Dancer today? Call 1-800-REAL-LIFE-HANSEL-GRETEL

Wadi and five others are on the phone lines now. Please call.

Continue reading

YA Lit: The “Classics”

I may love young adult books, but there’s no question that I’ve long passed the age of what qualifies as a “young adult.” Once upon a time, however, I was a mini version of me, and oh God did I love to read. Sure, it started with Little Bear and Frog and Toad Together, but before long, I was devouring both Sweet Valley High and the Great Illustrated Classics series that introduced me to literature greats like Robin Hood (which never failed to make me cry) and Call of the Wild. That little girl who happily curls up in any corner of a given room and shuts out the world from behind a novel? Yep, that was me. And on my less polite days, it still is. Continue reading

QOTD: Beat The Heat

Yeah, it is that hot. All over North America, and summer has only just started. How do you survive the heat? Do you make a swamp cooler, hang out at the community pool, or just go to the movies where the air conditioning is always set at 67° F?

On a Sunday afternoon you can probably find me floating in Falls Lake with a cold beer in my hand. Today’s QOTD:

What is your favorite hot weather recreation?

(photo: Flickr )

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