Daily Archives: March 7, 2011

13 posts

Gay Marriage Bans: Why Everyone Should Have the Right to Tie the Knot

This commentary was written by the lovely and talented Lady_E

So, the Indiana legislature passed a resolution amending the constitution to ban gay marriage and civil unions. More bluntly, they passed a resolution to insert discrimination and hate into the state constitution.

Reactions to the hate resolution have run the gamut from sadness to seething anger. Some are making plans to leave Indiana behind for less backwards jurisdictions while others have pledged to stay and fight. In the coming week, Antinickname and I will be debating the cri de guerre issued by the founder of the LGBT blog bilerico.com, Bil Browning, threatening to expose the moral failings, sins, and even covered up criminal activity of the ‘yea’ voting legislators.

But, before that, I want to comment on Indiana’s proposed amendment. The text would read, “Only a marriage between one man and one woman shall be valid or recognized as a marriage in Indiana.”

Supporters of this point to the Bible and “traditional” values. We’ve all seen the bumper stickers “Marriage = one man + one woman.” But, is that really all that marriage equals, from a religious or “traditional” viewpoint? I don’t think so. I would say that traditionally, and certainly religiously, “marriage” is defined by 3 parts: 1) between a man and a woman, 2) a life long commitment that 3) is entered into under the eyes of God.

Let’s use my family as an example. My parents are of different faiths, Jewish and Catholic. They were “married” in a civil ceremony because, even though they are one man/one woman, their marriage violates Part 3. According to the Catholic Church (and in God’s eyes as they say), my mother has never been married. After 35 years of marriage, if my father passed away, my mother could marry in a Catholic ceremony as if my father had never even existed. However, if my parents had been married in the Church and got divorced, any remarriage (and the divorce itself) would not be recognized (unless they got an annulment) because it would violate part 2.

Now, let’s look at my brother and his partner. They are both Jewish. They could get married in a reform temple regardless of the fact that they are both men. Why? Because what matters the most in this particular equation is again Part 3- they are both Jews. Were one of them not Jewish, they would be in the same boat as my parents, regardless of their sexual orientation.

Now think about what this means. My parents receive all the government benefits of being in a recognized marriage even though their marriage is considered harmful and illegitimate by both of their faiths. My brother and his partner, on the other hand, could be married in a temple by a rabbi before their congregation and before God, but would receive none of these same government benefits.

So, here’s what I think. If you want to define “marriage” as it is traditionally and religiously understood, then it shouldn’t be limited to just one of the three parts. Why should a second marriage be rewarded with tax benefits if one of the couple has already violated the “sanctity” of marriage- the life long commitment part? Isn’t that encouraging bad behavior that is harmful to traditional values? And, if we really want to get right down to it, the greatest sin of all from a Christian perspective, well above homosexuality, is to deny Christ the Savior. Well, guess who does that every single day? My dad (love ya, pops!). So, why should a union considered invalid and one that undermines the very purpose of a Christian marriage be recognized and rewarded by the State?

Of course, this will never happen (and I wouldn’t support such a proposal). It won’t happen because the gay marriage debate isn’t about the definition of “marriage.” It isn’t about traditional values or what the Bible says. It’s not even about what kind of relationships are harmful to society. To me, the gay marriage debate is very simple. A hate-filled majority is targeting a minority of fellow citizens for one simple reason- because they know they can do it with impunity. Because they know the same degree of scrutiny will never be applied to their relationships.

Koch Brothers: The HPV of Republican Politics

Man! Those Koch Brothers infect everything Republicans touch!

Wart #1 and Wart #2

Speaker Boehner recently replaced Nancy Pelosi’s “Green the Capital” program that transitioned the congressional food services into using only biodegradable food and drink containers in the congressional eateries.

Science makes him sad.

What did he replace the biodegradable materials with? Expandable polystyrene foam. A.K.A. Styrofoam. You know, that stuff never, ever, ever biodegrades. Ever.

Who is supplying Congress with their coffee cups and to-go boxes that will be poisoning landfills long after human stupidity has resulted in our ejection from this planet?

WinCup, a company owned by former Koch Industries executive George

Koch Industries, the cancer causing wart that continues to taint the Republican agenda.

Do they make Styrofoam knee pads?

Link: Wurtz.

Masterpiece Twitter: Ice-T and Coco

By Danzig and Dancing Queen

During its nearly five-year storied history, Twitter has remained steadfast in its commitment to bringing the best…or just bringing 140 character expressions from individuals around the world. The Twitterverse is filled with eclectic characters and contemporary celebrities who have filled the ether with their random thoughts on life, love and luxury.

In this weekly series, Danzing and Dancing Queen will risk brain cells and credibility scouring the Twitterscape to bring you the best of Twitter. We will then perform dramatic recitations of these tweets for your listening pleasure. Please, enjoy.

This week we feature Ice-T and his wife, Coco.

WARNING: Pictures and language are NSFW (Not safe for work, for the uninitiated)

Ice-T, as performed by Danzig: 

Coco, as performed by Dancing Queen: 

*Danzing and Dancing Queen are not professional actors, but do play actors on Crasstalk.

No One Here Gets Out Alive Part 2: DNR and Artificial Nutrition

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In Part One of our series, we all accepted the inevitable and subsequently gave serious thought to who we would choose to make decisions for us were we unable to do so.   Nah.  I know we’re all still in denial.  That’s why I plan to keep nagging you all by talking about this with some frequency.  Today we will talk a bit about some of the actual decisions you need to make for yourself, and possibly for a loved one.  Because I would like to not overwhelm you with information and give you enough information, I will break this down a couple of issues at a time.  Today we will discuss the two biggies:  Do Not Resuscitate orders and artificial nutrition.

DNR stands for ‘Do Not Resuscitate’.  What this means is that if your heart stops beating and you stop breathing, your medical and nursing providers will not attempt CPR or any other means of restarting your heart or breathing.  When making this decision it is important to be realistic about the limits and success of CPR.  TV representations of CPR are very unrealistic, with survival rates over double that of real life.  Also, contrary to what you may see on TV, people don’t get up and walk around after being resuscitated.  They spend days, maybe weeks, in an Intensive Care Unit on ventilation and, if they survive long enough to be discharged, a rate that has been described as being close to zero,  there is often residual physical and cognitive damage and months of rehabilitation that follows.

CPR survival rates range wildly and are affected by how sick you were in the first place.  Generally speaking, 3-37% of people outside of a hospital who get CPR survive the initial resuscitation.  It’s 3-15% for in hospital attempts, reflecting the poor outcomes for people who are already sick or elderly.  Again, this is ‘survival’ of the resuscitation attempt only.  As an historical side note, it has been noted that CPR survival rates have gone down since its introduction because it is used so often on people who are not appropriate candidates (people too sick or of an advanced age to survive)

The best candidates for CPR are younger, generally healthy, victims of trauma or who have a sudden cardiac arrest caused by an arrhythmia.

If you are making this decision for an elderly family member, the simple, honest truth is that they will not survive the attempt.  And even if they do, they will never get out of the ICU.  That is the blunt and honest truth.  Even more ‘Dr. House’:  we will do nothing but crack their ribs into pieces and disrespect their death by attempting it.

DNI: Do not intubate.  This generally goes along with a DNR.  I have seem some orders that are DNI only which is utterly nonsensical as you will need to be intubated if you stop breathing and your heart stops.  Why do CPR with all its intendant risks if you’re not going to follow it up with respiratory support?

Artificial Nutrition:  Artificial nutrition most often takes the form of tube feedings.  This is a tube that is surgically inserted into your stomach or intestine and a liquid supplement is infused directly in.  There are several indications for this, and it is not necessarily an end of life procedure.  For example, Roger Ebert has a gastric tube as a result of his cancer and surgery.  Anyone who loses their ability to swallow is a candidate.  People with esophageal or gastric cancer or people who have neurological swallowing issues because of a stroke are just a couple of examples.  Most of these people live perfectly fine lives with a feeding tube.  However, if you are in a persistent vegetative state or end stage dementia or end stage neurological disease, it is a different kind of decision.  You will have to think about how you would feel having this is there was no hope of recovery or returning to your previous mental state.   Many people with dementia lose their appetite as well as the ability to coordinate their chewing and swallowing which puts them at risk for aspiration and pneumonia.  A feeding tube is often recommended in this situation.  A feeding tube will only provide nutrition.  It will not cure or reverse the natural processes that are occurring.  The same is true of IV hydration.  As people lose the ability to swallow, they become dehydrated and the kidneys and body shuts down.  Fluids may be administered, but will only delay the inevitable.

It is important to note that it is not ‘starving’ someone if artificial nutrition or hydration is declined.  Any pain at end of life would be managed aggressively and comfort and dignity are the paramount goals.  In addition, the dehydration that naturally occurs results in electrolyte imbalances that cloud pain and cognition and provide a natural pain killer and release of endorphins.

I think that’s enough for today, kids.  If you want some help thinking about these decisions, there is an excellent resource called 5 Wishes that helps you think through these end of life decisions.  In the next installment, I will discuss dialysis, Do Not Hospitalize orders and organ donation – and the exciting unveiling of my own advance directives – Spoiler Alert! – Don’t keep me alive.

The awesome story behind the thumbnail pic.

City Guide: San Francisco

I love San Francisco.  Like any big city, we have our problems.  Yes, we are on occasion a bit preachy and sanctimonious.  Our politics can be screwy.  We get made fun of for stuff like the Happy Meals kerfuffle.  But great things happen here also, sometimes this can be a downright exciting city to live in.

Not only is it a lovely city to live in (most of the time), it’s a wonderful city to visit.  Apologies for the length (and number of Italian restaurants, but hey – it is San Francisco), and away we go. Continue reading →

Yakuza Are People, Too – A Cautionary Tale

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Journalism’s first obligation is to the truth. The second obligation is to protect the sources of sensitive information. True journalists will go to the mat for their sources. Judith Miller is one such journalist. Paul Branzberg was another.

Jake Adelstein is another in the long line of journalists doing their job no matter what the consequences are.

Mr. Adelstein was the first American to be hired by the Yomiuri Shimbun, Japan’s largest newspaper. He worked as a journalist on the police beat in Saitama and later in Tokyo covering organized crime for 12 years. He quit the newspaper and returned to the U.S. once threats were made against his safety by Tadamasa Goto, a powerful yakuza boss. Goto’s henchmen threatened Mr. Adelstein if he attempted to publish anything in regards to the suspicious conditions that allowed Goto to receive a liver transplant in the U.S. Later, after uncovering further details of a deal made with the FBI to allow Goto into the US, he ran the exposé in The Washington Post after Japanese publishers refused to print the piece. His book, Tokyo Vice, details the inner workings of the media and the symbiotic relationship of organized crime and the police force in Japan.

All this to say, the man knows of what he writes, which made him an obvious choice as consultant for a National Geographic documentary, Gangland Tokyo, about organized crime in Japan. As part of the consulting job, Mr. Adelstein states that helped arrange interviews, handled logistics, and did some of the interviews himself. He introduced the outsourced film team to his own sources and friends. He even went so far as to loan National Geographic footage of actual yakuza ceremonies, for their “dramatization” sequences.

However, National Geographic allegedly refused to allow Mr. Adelstein full access to the materials needed to verify the accuracy of the program. He has since resigned from his job as consultant and has returned his fees to National Geographic Television.

As he states on his website, Japan Subculture Research Center:

“For several months, I have repeatedly asked to have all the materials necessary to verify the “factual accuracy” of the program, as was the agreement. The reply from NGT was to insist that “factual accuracy” actually meant “general accuracy”, and that I was being difficult.”

National Geographic has had issues with objective, truthful reporting in the past. The company, of which News Corp. is a majority shareholder, has a history of manipulating images and creating sensationalistic stories through misinformation as reported in this lengthy exposé in The Huffington Post about National Geographic’s work about Africa and this damning report about the mistranslation of an important early Christian manuscript.

So perhaps it should come as no surprise that NatGeo’s use of outsourced film crews working as “parachute journalists“on the yakuza documentary would result in possible compromises of source safety for the sake of creating a fascinating narrative.

After viewing a rough cut of the program, Mr. Adelstein writes:

“I now have serious concerns about the safety of all Americans and Japanese sources, friends, and the staff of National Geographic Channel Japan who are involved with this program. There is a chance that the yakuza that have been betrayed by NGT will use violence against those residing in Japan to express their anger. I am even concerned about the safety of the yakuza that agreed to appear in the documentary, probably under false pretenses and false promises. They will face retaliation from their superiors if the program is aired as it is now. Yakuza are people too, a small minority of them are good people in their own right, and once they cooperate with the program, they are also sources. And sources have to be protected. That is the good faith that is demanded in responsible journalism.

(…)

There is a saying in Japanese, bushi wa nigon ga nai. Literally, a samurai doesn’t have a second word. What it means is that once a samurai has said he’ll do something or promises he’ll do something, he does and he keeps that promises. He doesn’t backpedal and say “factual accuracy” means “general accuracy” or that “we may have said that but that’s not what you signed.” Would I believe the word of three yakuza over the word of an LA based “film director” who brags about his reputation for doing awesome “dramatizations” and “re-creations”? Mmm…Yes. I’d believe the yakuza every time, in this case. The yakuza do have standards and practices. They are not particularly high standards but they exist. Most yakuza have them posted on large ornate scrolls posted on their office walls and written in bold dark cursive: “Any member who engages in theft, robbery, rape and or any other activity that runs contrary to the noble way (ninkyodo) will be expelled.” It’s very clear.

(…)

If they air the film as it is now and anyone is hurt, I’ll be the first one to go to the police and file charges of criminal negligence resulting in injury and/or death. And I will do my best to see that they are extradited. Because recklessly endangering or causing harm to others is a crime here in Japan where the documentary was filmed.

They can’t deny they knew there were dangers. The chain of emails that someone in the organization anonymously sent me establishes that, as well as does this posting. NGT has been warned; I hope they become enlightened and do the right thing for once. Ethical and factual journalism can actually be pleasant, if a little boring.”

Read the rest of Mr. Adelstein’s post here.

The yakuza are compelling figures. Just like the mafia in the West as depicted in The Sopranos or the Godfather franchise, the temptation is there to turn them into the ultimate anti-heroes. There’s a reason they even have fan magazines and video games set in the underworld of Japan. However, that doesn’t excuse NatGeo’s attempts to twist their documentary into a sensational pseudo-exposé at the expense of their sources’ welfare.

H/T: DogsofWar, Botswana Meat Commission FC, Lucky and Rumpofsteelskin. Image via TokyoMango.

The Animal Kinkdom: Homosexuality

Sex.  Kinky sex.  And lots of it.  Sometimes for days, sometimes for weeks.  Heterosexuals, homosexuals, asexuals, transgendered, transvestites, and transsexuals.  Incest, necrophilia, and hermaphrodite orgies.  It seems, the only sexual deviants in the animal world are monogamists.  Who knew?  (Certainly not Cole Porter.)

Not too long ago, it was believed that, like humans, animals stuck to the old maxims of the birds and the bees, male and female. Boy, was that wrong!  Homosexuality is rampant among animals such as male giraffes and lions.  Female apes use tools to masturbate.  Even sea snails join in the bestial fun with train-like orgies that can last for days. But, rest assure, “no matter how bizarre the behavior, there’s probably a reason to it”1.  This begs the question, what is the purpose of sex if not for procreation?  I plan to answer this and more in a series entitled: The Animal Kinkdom.

 

The Animal Kinkdom: Homosexuality

There are over 1500 species that engage in homosexual activity 3.  It doesn’t matter where in the world, or what animal group, chances are it’s happening.  More interestingly, it is met with little hostility and is in fact a common behavior among animals of status.  If that doesn’t surprise you, let’s take a look at some specific examples of male homosexuality before penetrating a possible reason.

Male Giraffes are often caught canoodling across Africa in an overt sexual act dubbed “neck rubbing”1.

 

In the absence of females, the kings of the animal world affectionately kiss, hug, and caress their brothers. Sex is less frequent, but happens (perhaps after a lazy afternoon of eating fermented marula fruit)! Even Cheetahs form their own “members only” brotherhoods complete with benefits.

Does this seem somewhat standard so far?  You must be wondering how exactly this is considered “kinky.” Well, it’s not. Not until now. Monkeys and apes take the kinky cake in this article. Hold on to your loins, this ride is about to get freaky.

 

 

Let’s begin with the ever inventive male Orangutang.  These resourceful little fellows have a wincing trick up their sleeve – they can retract their penis, turning it into a penetrable cavity1.  Yes, that’s what I said, a retractable penis.  With opposable thumbs and fingers, playtime becomes sexy-time in no-time.

 

 

 

Anal sex, anyone?  Though it is a less frequent behavior, there are a couple species who’ve “mastered the fine art of the back door”1.  Normal social behavior such as grooming between Macaques quickly turns sexual often followed by anal penetration.  The aptly named Big Horned Sheep also participates in backdoor dalliances, on rocky terrain no less!

“What about the birds?” asks a shocked Cole Porter. “There are male ostriches that only court their own gender, and pairs of male flamingos that mate, build nests, and even raise foster chicks.” 3

Last, but certainly not least, is a dear friend of ours: Bed Bugs.

Male bed bugs (Cimex lectularius) are sexually attracted to any newly fed individual and this results in homosexual mounting. This occurs in heterosexual mounting by the traumatic insemination in which the male pierces the female abdomen with his needle- like penis. In homosexual mating this risks abdominal injuries as males lack the female counteradaptive spermalege structure. Males produce alarm pheromones to reduce such homosexual matings. 3

Yikes.

Now let’s visit the question of “why?”  What is the purpose of homosexual behavior if it doesn’t lead to procreation?  So far, there is no definitive explanation.  At first thought, it seems to oppose the evolutionary imperative of continuing one’s genetic legacy.  However, with deeper thought, that may not be the case. Speculation suggests it’s preparation and practice for the actual act of mating, which makes sense as females choose the best male with which to mate – a male skilled in impregnation will have higher odds of furthering their lineage.  Further, as the act of sex leaves most animals vulnerable to attack, the more efficient the better.  Other, more wild speculation, is that it helps regulate the population by providing a sexual release, or act as an outlet for those without partners. I guess this means the old adage is true: practice does make perfect!

In any case, homosexuality is rampant in the animal world; however, this isn’t the only sexual behavior that’s not reproductive. Next up on Animal Kinkdom: Masturbation.

Interested in seeing the full list of animals? Look here.

 

Sources:

1. Wild Sex. (Documentary) National Geographic. 2005.

2. List of animals displaying homosexual behavior. (2011, February 25). In Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia. Retrieved 19:21, March 6, 2011, fromhttp://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=List_of_animals_displaying_homosexual_behavior&oldid=415920139

3. Homosexual Activity Among Animals Stirs Debate. Owen, James. National Geographic News. (http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2004/07/0722_040722_gayanimal.html)

 

The Amazing Race Recap: Big In Japan

Welcome back to a busy leg of The Amazing Race! In what I think may be a race first, instead of lolling about at a resort until the morning, after the teams checked into the pit stop they were sent on an overnight train ride from The Outback to Somewhere With Airplanes. The Nerds (Zev and Justin) were the first to leave the pit stop and learned that they had to fly to Tokyo, Japan. They reminisced about the last time they were in Japan and had to eat fistfuls of wasabi. Otherwise, they were nonplused by their destination.  One person that was super duper OMG! holy cow we’re going to Japan! Did you read that? We’re going to Jah-payyyuuun!!!! Whoooo! was the Daughter half of Father/Daughter. Maybe Japan was on her bucket list, or maybe she just really likes sushi and questionable fashion trends. I don’t know. But she was excited.

Eventually the teams all figured out that there were two flights to Japan–a direct flight that got in at 6:15am, and a connecting flight that got in at 6:00am. Now, I’ve watched enough seasons of TAR to know that you do not risk a connection over fifteen minutes. But despite having actually run the race before, some teams did not know this. People, please. If you’re going on a reality television show, do yourself a favor and watch a few seasons beforehand. You can learn lots of great stuff, like never give away an immunity idol, never make a dress that could be worn by the mother of a bride, and never choose a connecting flight over a direct flight to save fifteen minutes. Sheesh!

The Nerds and the Globetrotters were waffling back and forth between the direct flight and the connecting flight, and eventually decided to go for the one that got in earlier. But, waffling takes time, and time is not your friend on TAR. By the time they went to purchase their tickets for the connecting flight, there were only 2 seats left. What would they do? Flip a coin? Rock, Paper, Scissors? Thunderdome? Nope. The Globetrotters let the Nerds have the last two seats because the Nerds had helped them out with a clue earlier. Have I mentioned that I love these guys?

Along with the Nerds, the “Couple,” The Deaf Kid And His Umbilical Cord, Mel and Mike, and the Cheerleaders all opted to take the connecting flight. The bad news is that there were engine troubles with the connecting flight. The good news is, they were on the ground when they found out about the engine troubles. But it did delay their flight, and I hate to say I told you so (that’s not true, I actually love it), but the direct flight landed first.

Once in Japan, the teams had to drive themselves to city of Kamakura and find the Yabusame Dojo. The parking garage was the coolest thing ever! The cars rotated on a giant Wonder Wheel and spit out of a slot like a vending machine. And for an added bonus, the Globetrotters looked like they were driving a little clown car, which may or may not be part of their basketball routine.

All of the teams seemed to get a bit lost, and Old Yeller started doing his yelling thing again. But, berating his daughter paid off because they got to the Roadblock first. Way to reward bad behavior, TAR.

At the Roadblock, one team member had to participate in a Yabusame training exercise. Old Yeller himself chose to do the Roadblock and was dressed as a samurai and given a bow and arrow. I would not have given an angry, short-tempered old man a weapon, but hey, that’s just me. The Sisters Who Peed In China, the Globetrotters, and Father/Daughter arrived shortly afterwards and got suited up and began practicing the routine which involved some sort of bending exercises and shooting an arrow through a piece of plywood while riding a mechanical bull set to “easy peasy lemon squeezy” mode.

The Sister hit the target first, and that pissed off Old Yeller. Next was Justin. Bam! Hit the target. Then the Father. Old Yeller must’ve been steaming at that. The “Couple”, Mel and Mike, and the Deaf Kid And His Umbilical Cord showed up at the Roadblock just as the Globetrotters completed the task. Finally, Old Yeller let out a yelp and hit the target and his daughter cheerfully exclaimed “good job, Daddy!” What a nice family, I think they’re going to really bond over this experience.

Two teams were missing in action–the Cowboys and the Cheerleaders. The Cowboys were very, very, very lost. Their navigational plan was to drive “south.” I’m not sure if they understood that Japan is an island, and too much driving “south” would lead to a very long swim.

In contrast to the Cowboys’ lackadaisical approach, the Cheerleaders rammed right into another car. They hit a side mirror, and the car’s owner called the police. The Cheerleaders broke a mirror. Ha! Throw them in jail for Extreme Irony (and Horribleness)! Although the police did not throw them in jail (they ordered the Cheerleaders to hug the other driver, figuring forcing these women to be nice was the cruelest punishment of all), the incident did slow down their race considerably.

All teams eventually completed the Roadblock and were sent to a railway station to find a statue and their next clue. The Nerds and Father/Daughter got there first. The teams had a choice between two tasks–Prayer of Purity or Frog of Life. In Prayer of Purity, the teams had to complete a cleansing ritual and then stand under a freezing cold waterfall for one minute. In Frog of Life, teams had to strip down, get into a mud pit, and search for a plastic frog while being pelted with mud by boisterous locals. Please choose Frogs of Life, please choose Frogs of Life, please choose Frogs of Life!

They chose Frogs of Life! Whoo hoo! The task looked absolutely awful. Not only were they looking for a small frog in a mud pit while wearing nothing but a diaper, but the locals were serious about pelting them with mud. The Nerds found the frog first and had to drive to the pit stop in Kuriyama, Japan. Father/Daughter were close on their heels, so to speed things up, the Nerds hopped in their car pantsless.  I am now performing a purity ritual on my eyeballs.

Speaking of purity rituals, Old Yeller and the Globetrotters were the only teams to choose this task. I hope the ritual cleansed the evil out of Old Yeller, because he was in rare form. The Globetrotters made quick work of the task and completed the task first.  While grabbing their backpacks to leave, they accidentally picked up Old Yeller’s fanny pack which contained Ron and Christina’s passports. Whoops!  Realizing their mistake, the Globetrotters left the fanny pack in the changing room. This left Old Yeller fuming because he had spent a few minutes berating his daughter for not being more careful. Good work, Globetrotters! You pushed that man one step closer to the edge.

As the Cheerleaders headed to the frog task, the Nerds were running to the mat. For the second week in a row, the Nerds were team number one. Good for you, pantsless boys! Father/Daughter were next, followed by the Globetrotters and Old Yeller. Old Yeller was not happy about the fanny pack situation and complained to Phil, who gave the Globetrotters a 30 minute penalty. Fair enough I suppose, but still, it was a bit of a snitchy thing to do.

Meanwhile, more digging through mud, more frogs and diapers, and the Cheerleaders finally made it to the mud pit. The sun had gone down, and the only other team left was Mel and Mike. Poor Mel was a wreck. Mike had the good senses to take his father to a nearby ambulance to warm up. Unfortunately, getting into an ambulance is never a good strategy for winning TAR.

The Cheerleaders found the frog pretty quickly, which meant Mel and Mike were the last ones left at the task. The Cheerleaders never saw Mel and Mike in the ambulance, so when they got to the mat, they assumed that they were going to be eliminated. When Phil told them that they were team number nine, something horrible happened. One of the Cheerleaders (I don’t know which one, they both look the same, it’s kind of creeping me out) said “shut the front door!” as a substitute for “shut the fuck up!” No. Just no. There is no place for cleaned up churchy-speak on TAR, and I hope that the next time one of them pulls crap like that, the producers bleep it out so that my ears do not have to be offended by their non-potty-mouths.

Mel and Mike didn’t finish the task and were eliminated. That’s too bad, but it was bound to happen eventually, and Mike did say that he didn’t want to kill his father, so mission accomplished. The teams are off to China for the next leg, where it looks like the “Couple” takes a long drive in the wrong direction. Fun!

So what did you think? Did the Globetrotters deserve the penalty? Were you hoping this was a non-elimination leg, or would it have been cruel to force Mel to continue?