19 posts
I have vowed to always use my commenting powers for good and not evil, and to never, ever insist that I am right when I really have no idea what I am talking about. Unfortunately, I have broken my vows on many occasions.

Celebrity Apprentice Recap: The Strangest Mix of Stars Since Sha Na Na Played Woodstock

Welcome to the fifty-ninth season of Celebrity Apprentice, where money is no objec—oh whoops! Looks like budgets have been slashed because Donald Trump, the man of a million hair follicles, pulls up to Lincoln Center in a limousine instead of a helicopter. A limousine? How nouveau riche! He greets the eighteen “celebrities” on the stage of Avery Fischer Hall while a live orchestra plays his theme song in the background. Our eighteen “celebrities” are as follows: Continue reading

The Walking Dead Recap: Right Back Where We Started

Hi zombies! I mean readers! Now where did we leave off last week? Oh right. Ranger Rick just killed Random Guy One and Random Guy Two, who would’ve/could’ve/should’ve been the most interesting characters on the show, while Shane and Blondie had a zombie bonfire. There’s also some chick in sticker shock at the price of barn zombies, and Lori crashed her car so she may be dead and/or not pregnant. So. Are they finally going to get off of the farm? Let’s find out, shall we? Continue reading

The Walking Dead Recap: Love in the Time of Zombies

And we’re back! Please be chock full o’zombies, please be chock full o’zombies, please be chock full o’zombies.

We open with Lori and Carl at the chicken coops, where Lori throwing chicken feed at Carl. He seems fully recovered yet unnaturally pale. Carl observes that “everything’s food for something else.” So true, Carl. You are no longer the top of the food chain. The camera cuts to Mrs. Hershel in a dark corner of the chicken coop. She breaks a chicken’s legs and stuffs it into a burlap sack. We then see her bringing a wheelbarrow full of broken-legged chickens to the zombie barn. She dumps them on the ground for a zombie feeding frenzy, and we are all secretly disappointed that it’s only chickens. Continue reading

The Walking Dead Recap: You’re The One For Me

I’d like to start out this episode with a prayer. A prayer to The Gracious Gods of Television. *Ahem* Dear Gods, please let this episode include a boatload of zombies. Like a lot of zombies. More than last week and the week before combined. Also, benevolent Gods of the Boob Tube, please resolve the Sophia storyline quickly and, hopefully, painfully. Let a zombie rip that little girl to shreds in the most gruesome, horrible way possible because we, as mere viewers, don’t care one whit about her character. Ah-freaking-men. Continue reading

The Zombies Are Back!

Shhh! Can you hear it? That low growling moan off in the distance? Either the neighbor’s cat is in heat (again), or there’s a second wave of zombies headed right for your living room. Yes, zombies. After a long hiatus, the second season of The Walking Dead premieres tonight at 9 p.m. on AMC. And, since zombiism is a real threat facing modern society, I suggest you watch and learn. Continue reading

Eleven Eight Habits of Highly Intriguing Women

Last week we learned about the Eleven Habits of Highly Imposing Men. Well, good for them, standing in the corner smoking their cigarettes and looking all sorts of imposing. I’m here to share with you the Eight Habits Of Highly Intriguing Women. Eight? Yes, eight. Women are far more efficient than men, so we don’t need the extra three habits.

So what is a Highly Intriguing Woman? She is the woman who is both the life of the party, and the lifesaver of the office. She knows what she wants, and she knows how to get it. Something about bacon and frying pans. Well, you get the idea. Let’s get started, shall we? Continue reading


Don’t panic, folks. That shaking you felt that rattled your desk while you were trying to comment on your friend’s Facebook status? That was just a 5.9 earthquake in Virgina that rippled across the east coast. I’m sure we’ll all be fine, so just go back to “work” now.

So. What did you do to survive the Earthquake of 2011?


Eating Your Way Through the Lower East Side

The Lower East Side has always been food-centric with its pickles and bialys and kosher bakeries. But only in the past few years has it become foodie-centric.

The biggest changes to the neighborhood have occurred below Delancey Street, which used to be a ghost town but is rapidly becoming a destination. Below are a few places that I recommend your taste buds get better acquainted with: Continue reading