It’s one thing to have some jack-a-noob yammering away while you watch the very important movie Contagion at the multiplex, and another thing entirely if said person is yammering away at fighter jet decibels on his cell phone while Gwyneth Paltrow is dying. This is something that could possibly go beyond jerkdom and land you squarely onto the endangered species list. Everyone’s ear holes are very serious business.
Jerk Alert
Some of these guys have cropped up in the news lately, but they’re not a new faction to our society. No sir. I’ve been talking about Deli Rubes and Coffee Shop Hobos for years. Since about 2007 or so, and the affliction that they suffer from hasn’t gotten much better. I think I’ll call this affliction “Me-ism.” Yes, yes, I know there’s probably some other well-nuanced term I could use. Narcissism, or self-centeredness….yawr, whatever. No, I’m going with the very simple…Me-ism. Continue reading
There is no way around it. There are just some things that are too awful to exist. Like legitimately sent to kill everyone in its wake. Denny’s is just such a place. Continue reading
It’s never good to hate, especially nerds. There’s no way you’ll ever get your computer fixed now. No, not ever. You should also think about the ramifications of hating on a millionaire nerd. Those guys basically rule the world. But really, and truly, nerd hate only hurts one person…you.
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Well, my goodness, what’s wrong with you? Why is your head down on your desk? Okay, okay, let’s uncurl your fingers from that stapler. No, no, we’re not sure you’re ready to hold your, “Best Employee in the World” mug right now…not until you tell us what happened. Oh, wait…what does that email say? Something about TPS reports need to be shipped to CHINA! by 5pm today? Well, um, okay…you better take a few deep breaths.
Start somewhere at the beginning. Continue reading