Hey, kiddies. No time for a full Hollywood Caller, so we’re just going to talk about one quick bit of news that’s made the rounds today.
The Red Dawn remake starring Thor and Peeta, or meatloaf ab pans, Chris Hemsworth, and smarmy, poppin-fresh-dough, tributeer, Josh Hutcherson, is already done and in the can, so the studio leaked a few pics just to let us know basically that this movie is sorta like the one from 1984, but not quite, since well enough can never be left alone. No, not when you can replace everyone with mystical sky gods, and bedraggled, forever damned children having the worst case of The Running Man ever.
So here it is. The ode to your childhood now starring these guys! And instead of fighting the Soviets, because yeah, so 1980’s, they’re now fighting the North Koreans which seems interesting, and not at all likely to spark some North Korean blowback.
What do you think? Durr, yeah.
Here’s the original which starred the aforementioned late Patrick Swayze whose legacy can still Ghost out and Road House kick with the best of ’em; Charlie Sheen, who’s well, Charlie Sheen, some sort of narcotic-fueled space dragon; and C. Thomas Howell, whose portrayal in The Hitcher along with Rutger Hauer is still one of the most chilling things seen ever, and who’s now, we dunno, living in Fresno maybe(?) and doing things on basic cable. No matter! Ponyboy forever!
Yeah. Remember this? Well, now that you’ve thought about 1984, those of you who remember, and just giggle-squealed about having a fab Trapper Keeper with a pic of Matt Dillon with his Little Darlings hair shoved in the inside pocket — let’s break your revelry with some commentary by Chris Hemsworth, walking meat stocking, who had this to say about the Red Dawn remake:
“I saw it the other day and I was like, ‘Oh, right, I made this!'” joked Hemsworth to EW last week, talking about making the film before he had much experience in Hollywood. “It had this school camp feel. We were all from somewhere else and we were all excited about the adventure we were about to go on. It was like going to a new school, it’s just that at this school, we were shooting at people.”
YEAH?! REALLY?! YEAH?! Facepalm. Remakes. They hurt.
Image Source: Thinksquad, Image:EW, Image Credit: Ron Phillips, and DBCovers
