reality tv

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25 Seasons of The Real World — That’ll Do, MTV. That’ll Do.

Well this thing has become trash. And not trash in the way The Jersey Shore is “trash.” There are no misconceptions about what The Jersey Shore is supposed to be. Social experiments aside, The Jersey Shore is about self-aware individuals who are content in their lifestyle, their partying, their day-to-day idiocy and free-for-all antics. It’s not about the meshing, diversity, or growth of the individuals involved. This is what The Real World once brought to the table.

Now the lowest common denominator of themes in reality television has taken root in this once ground-breaking show. All the things that are a quick recipe for ratings — alcohol, partying, sex, and fights, often some variation of all three done simultaneously, are depicted season after season. When we once could predict who could potentially clash due to their backgrounds, faith, sexuality, culture, diversity, values, or loyalties — now it’s just about who gets so drunk that they show themselves to be a supreme dick — or who is so emotionally damaged that it’s a crapshoot whether or not the show will be cathartic, or a trigger for some unpredictable epic meltdown. Unquestioningly, MTV seems more interested in pushing someone to the brink of insanity and less concerned about a dialogue that works to close gaps between people. It’s pretty disheartening to see such a fall of a once prolific show and dare I say the grandfather of all reality shows of its ilk.

What’s Going Wrong?

The people. Yes, it’s the people. No matter what ethnicity or background, MTV has decided that it’s less lucrative to have interesting, dynamic people on the show. Now it’s best to have similar carbon copy clones of the same person just walking around in different skin. Remember how they would spend time unveiling the layers to each person — who had a job, who was in school, what their home life was like, what their hopes, dreams, and fears were? Yes, well, now it’s one big mish-mash of “Woo-hoo! I’m going to hook up, pass out, get arrested, and then go on the Challenge series and win money!” It’s also become a game of trying to guess who the mystery madman is. Who the abuse victim is, and what two potentially damaged souls are going to hook up and have an odd, abusive, co-dependent relationship. (They’re repeating this trope with Sammi and Ron on the Jersey Shore and we’re sick of that too.)

But The Real World was supposed to be better than this. After all, this was the show that discussed issues of race, homophobia, sexuality, AIDS, and substance abuse. And it’s not as if there aren’t still thought-provoking stories to tell, and unique young people out there who are able to tell them. MTV has just gotten lazy, and has decided that the writhing horde is only satisfied with drama, abuse, and drunkenness. Let’s take a look at what we’ve got so far with the 25th season of the show.

Adam — Self-ascribed “Bad Boy.” We’ll call him poseur-douche. Yah, yah, he did time in Juvie. Which is his current claim to fame. He can’t wait to tell each cast member this little gem. MTV has identified him as the loose cannon, so we expect drunken flip-outs, fights, possibly an arrest, and basically the alienation of the entire house. But, not to be outdone, MTV has also given us someone with control issues when it comes to women. He’s stalky and manipulative. All signs point to abusive tendencies.

Nany — Lover of self-ascribed “Bad-Boys.” She enters the house with one for a boyfriend back home. She’s drawn to Adam — of course — despite her plaintive cries that she’s on The Real World for more independence, since this was something that she was not getting in her current relationship. Great. Previews show her getting into a negative cycle with Adam where she basically becomes his co-dependent apologist. Fantastic.

Dustin — Boyish frat boy. Look up all things you’ve seen ever about boyish frat boys and you’ll find Dustin. He’s had a bit of a troubled home-life, but this has become par for the course for MTV. He’s already displayed some possessive tendencies along with his easy-going charm, and his liberal use of hip-hop speak when angry is just comical. He has a secret. He’s not gay per se, but he did do a little experiment that involved a house full of attractive young men and a continuous web cam. This will probably bring up questions about his sexuality…but he’s probably not gay, just attention seeking.

Heather — Pretty, blonde, petite suburban good-girl — but also a huge party girl. She’s already piqued the interest of Dustin and lands squarely into the first fight of the season between two male cast-mates. She will most likely enter into a relationship with Dustin which may cause problems — problems which MTV loves. Prepare for grainy hookup footage of Dustin and Heather, and the potential for uncomfortable moments down the road. Cue crying in the confessional and a punch through a wall.

Michael — Small town guy with views on faith, politics, science, religion etc. He’s a Libertarian. Should be interesting, right? Well, he tries to discuss some of these things with his cast-mates and their response…”I dunno, dude. Let’s do shots!” We expect Michael, who has some demons in his past, to get frustrated quickly, and perhaps show the roommates more about himself than they anticipated.

 

Naomi — MTV lists her as a “Hispanic firecracker.” Um, okay. I assume that should say it all then?  Of course there’s more to her than that, but in the first two episodes they’ve shown very little with the exception of her saying that she didn’t understand what Michael was talking about during one of his monologues. Oh, and there may be a pregnancy scare in Naomi’s future. Not something we’ve seen on the show since Tami Trishelle in Vegas (Uno). We’re not excited.

Leroy — The ladies man who walks into the house and sizes up the bedroom choices for premiere hookup ability. Hmm, yes. He’s on the show for one reason and one reason only so it seems. We don’t think Leroy intends to grow and learn from this experience with the exception of things that have to do with a carnal nature. He’s already led the stampede to the hot tub, instigated a sticky truth or dare situation, and by episode two he’s one of the first to hookup with an outsider. Here‘s to hoping there’s more to his story for whatever that’s worth. Also, he’s the one Naomi has the pregnancy scare conversation with, so there’s that.

So many, many similarities to cast members of seasons from the last few years, right? Sure, it seems that MTV is putting their eggs into the Jersey Shore basket. But instead of trying to make The Real World either compete with that or try to outdo it, perhaps it’s just time to call it quits with this season, eh? It’s no longer fun or rewarding. Given the current dynamic MTV employs, there really isn’t any new story to tell here, and it doesn’t seem that they’re looking to add anything new to the genre. And if The Real World is supposed to be a small microcosm of what is going on in the lives of young twenty-somethings, than that world just seems like a hollow, depressing place to be, and so very narrow in its thinking.

There are a number of shows that depict young people proliferating in the superficial, sensational spectacle that is reality television, but if you’re going to offer the world Jersey Shore, which is unapologetically debased on purpose for our entertainment, shouldn’t you also offer the world a point of view that highlights the better parts of being young and twenty-two?

The Amazing Race: Unfinished Episode

Hello. My name is Misslinda and I am an Amazing Race addict. There, that felt better.

This season, The Amazing Race rounded up “team favorites” to race around the world a second time. And by “team favorites,” they mean teams that we all love (The Harlem Globetrotters, The Cowboys, and Mel and Mike) mixed with teams that make us want to throw things at the television (The Cheerleaders, The Deaf Boy And His Umbilical Cord, The “Couple” With Zero Sexual Chemistry, and The Worst Father Ever And His Subservient Daughter) plus a few teams nobody even remembers (A Father/Daughter Team, Some Guy And Some Girl, Some Nerdy Guys, and The Sisters Who Had To Pee In China).

The eleven teams started out in Palm Springs, California and were told that the first ones to reach the mat would get an “Express Pass.” The Express Pass allows a team to skip one task at any point in the race. This is a very valuable pass because every team finds themselves completely screwed by a task that they just can’t finish without killing each other.

The teams ended up on two flights to Australia—the Earlier Flight, and the Later Flight. The Earlier Flight was scheduled to land 90 minutes before the Later Flight which is, by TAR standards, a pretty decent lead. Unfortunately, a passenger on the Earlier Flight had a heart attack, which necessitated landing in Hawaii and refueling. The eight teams on the Earlier Flight did not take this turn of events well and lamented the loss of their lead. Only The Globetrotters said that the important thing was that the passenger got the medical attention he needed. These guys are all class. If I wasn’t already rooting for them to win, I’d switch teams.

So the Earlier Flight becomes the Later Flight, and the Later Flight (containing Some Guy And Some Girl, Father/Daughter, and The Sisters) catches a lucky break at the expense of a poor man’s heart. Way to go, Later Flight.

Once in Sydney, Australia, the teams navigated public transportation to an aquarium. At the aquarium, one team member had to scuba dive in a tank filled with sharks and stingrays to find a giant compass the size of a personal-sized pizza. This is the point in the race where I state, for the millionth time, that I could never be on The Amazing Race. I can’t swim, and I can’t drive, so my racing skills are rather limited. But kudos to all of these people for suiting up and diving into a tank filled with teeth and other stabby things.

All teams found the compasses, with The Cowboys and The “Couple” lagging a bit behind. The compass was like a secret decoder ring and the teams’ next task was to translate strings of nautical flags into a message that would give them their next clue. This did not seem like a difficult task—match the flag with the corresponding flag on the compass to spell out sentences. The only difficulty seemed to be that the sentences were really long, and there were three of them. So some teams were frustrated and impatient and followed other teams to the next checkpoint with only parts of the clue, only to have to go back and try it again. Some teams begged for information from competing teams, while others worked together to cut the decoding time in half. Still others were totally stumped.

Some Guys appear to be working with The Globetrotters. How do I know this? Some Guys were wearing t-shirts that said “Harlem Globetrotters” in big bold letters and helped the Globetrotters with the clue. Other teams just sort of bunched together, aimlessly helping whomever asked, without having printed corresponding t-shirts ahead of time.

The clue led the teams to something called a “skiff” which looked like a tiny, not-very-seaworthy sailboat. The team members had to dangle off of the sides of this floating contraption and grab the next clue from a buoy. The Cheerleaders’ skiff capsized, trapping them underneath, which gave me hope that this would turn into A Very Special Amazing Race. Unfortunately, no such luck. They are fine, just a bit soggy. But, it did jumpstart The Cheerleaders’ habit of berating, yelling at, and ordering around the locals who are there to help them, so there’s something.

In the end, Some Guy And Some Girl made it to the finish line first, earning them the coveted Express Pass. Then Phil yelled, “Surprise! I know you’re tired from an 18-hour flight, scuba diving with sharks, and balancing on a scrap of plastic attached to a sail on some very choppy waters, but you are still racing! So go! Move! GET OUT OF HERE!” and kicked them off of the mat.

The only team that didn’t make it to the mat was The Cowboys. They were confounded by the nautical flags and all tuckered out from running back and forth to check and see if they got it right. And, since all of the other teams had already moved on, there was nobody left to help them. They would have to help themselves, and boy, did they look helpless. The episode is “to be continued,” so we will have to wait an entire week to find out if they catch up, which may be how long it will take for them to figure out the clue.

So, what did you think of this episode? Which teams are you rooting for? How long until The Worst Father Ever loses his cool? Are you looking forward to another season of squicky bedroom talk from The “Couple”?