http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ylRplLnU84
A certain large-breasted female posted a few weeks ago regarding the trials and tribulations of being a big chested girl. Arguably, while having big boobs might put you at risk for scoliosis, they are still boobs. A life without boobs, is a sad life indeed.
1. Being in Playboy. Yes, I realize many (all) of them have surgically enhanced their breasts, but as a part of my holistic, natural life style, I refuse to insert foreign objects into my body. (This is a complete lie.) Why can’t Playboy just take me the way God made me?
2. Having extra storage space. I have girlfriends that store their cell phone, credit card and cash in their cleavage. You know what happens when I put something in my cleavage? It falls out.
3. Getting titty fucked. I hear stories of this erotic experience whereby a woman jerks a man off using her breasts. I have better luck jerking a guy off with my arm pit.
4. Having something fun to play with. Have you seen boobs? They are fun and jiggly. I have to play with other people’s boobs if I want something fun and jiggly.
5. Having maximum amount of fun in halter tops. Halter top shirts and dresses just aren’t the same for flat chested women. When a chick with big boobs puts on a halter top, there is a mysterious nether region that gives off an aura of mystery and excitement. All I get is a sunburn.
6. Landing the cover of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition. See complaint voiced in #1.
7. Getting properly motorboated. Who wants to stick their nose against a wall and rub?
8. Being able to deal with the number 8. We’re going to skip 8 because if you turn your head sideways, they are BREASTS and I have a complex.
9. Wearing my bras as earmuffs. A girl with 36DD breasts need only to take her bra off in the winter and she’s got instant earmuffs. If I took my bra off, I could maybe… clean my sunglasses with it.
10. Being the center of attention. If you go out with your large breasted girlfriend, she will get the free drink before you. Itty bitty titty hoes like alcohol just as much as you breastacularly inclined hoes!
