Parenting Pet Peeves

There was a great article on Crasstalk about pet peeves recently. I suffer from a variety of them which is probably not one of my best personality traits. As I thought about it, I realized that there are some pet peeves that are particular to being a parent. Then I decided to do a post on this because it’s extremely fun to hear other parents’ pet peeves.

  • Competitive parenting of any variety (My baby learned to walk when she was just a fetus! My 2 year old can recite the Gettysburg address! My preteen has just been admitted to medical school!)
  • Parents with multiples who have their act together. How do they do it? It reflects poorly on me since I can barely keep my act together with 2 children 2.5 years apart.
  • Parents who allow their children to be rude to waitresses, store clerks, or anyone in a service position.
  • Anyone who brings a small child to a nice restaurant. Don’t torture the childless and the parents who are having a romantic evening out. Children belong at Olive Garden and Chucky Cheese.
  • That f****ing lisping duck on WonderPets.
  • Toys with motion detectors that oink, bark, squeak or whinny when someone walks by them.
  • Dominoes. Why do people keep giving my kids dominoes? We have enough to start a domino domination nation around here.
  • Anyone whose children look perfect. It’s not normal. They get bonus pet peeve points if they dress their children in matching or coordinating clothing.
  • Skinny, attractive mothers who never, ever look flustered.
  • Children who are under the impression that I’m primarily a waitress (I’m looking at you, Mr. Wee Cornnut)
  • My spouse pretending he doesn’t smell a poopy diaper.
  • People who talk baby talk to my kids in a really loud fake voice.
  • People I barely know who give me parenting advice.
  • Parents who feed their kids organic-only and make a huge commotion about it.
  • Anyone who tells me I look exhausted (I know!)
  • Competitive sports parents. I know I already mentioned competition but these people deserve a second mention. They are sucking all the joy of childhood
  • Legos on the floor. Those things hurt like the dickens when you step on them.
  • People who are mean to their kids. This one isn’t funny. Every once in a while, I hear someone say something that is flat-out mean to their child. I really, really wish people would not do that.

What are your parenting pet peeves?

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