The clowns have assembled at the Ronald Reagan Shrine in Trickledown, California for another session of electoral debasement. Watch governors quake in terror at the Orange menace! Gawk in horror at the reagan fellating! Let’s weep with despair for our country mock them together!
The number of official 2016 presidential candidates doubled Tuesday when Kentucky senator Rand Paul announced he will challenge Canadian Ted Cruz for the GOP nomination. At CornCon in Des Moines, Iowa, Paul drove his ethanol-powered sportscar, Goldbug, onto the floor of cavernous Hall D of the Polk County Civic Center, emerging to thunderous applause to the crowd of Star Trek cosplayers and hangers-on who were actually expecting George Takei and whatshisname from Star Trek: Voyager. Continue reading
Eccentric Canadian citizen Rafael “Ted” Cruz announced he will run for the Presidency of the United States. Cruz, who was born in a foreign country and is as ineligible to hold the office of president as say, Fidel Castro or Mitt Romney’s dad, is much-beloved by as much as 4% of the GOP electorate, and is expected to be a serious contender for the GOP nomination until actual primaries begin and real votes are cast. Cruz, a Canadian, represents Texas, the place he lives now, not Canada, the foreign land of his birth, in the US senate. Continue reading