Remember when Joaquin Phoenix was this inexplicable star on the rise? When he shocked us with his creepily stunning portrayal in Gladiator, and the soul-bearing performance he gave in Walk the Line, both of which he received Oscar nominations for? And then remember when he and Casey Affleck, who we haven’t seen recently despite his brother’s rise, did that little experimental project where Phoenix mumble-rapped as a hygienically-challenged crazed hobo? Yeah, well, Phoenix has decided to appear back in fighting Oscar contender form this year with the critically acclaimed The Master, but also not totally let go of that weirdo, stage-falling bearded nutter-bum of a persona.
In an interview he recently told the Oscar season to “piss off.” His exact words were:
“I’m just saying that I think it’s bullshit,” Phoenix says. “I think it’s total, utter bullshit, and I don’t want to be a part of it. I don’t believe in it. It’s a carrot, but it’s the worst-tasting carrot I’ve ever tasted in my whole life. I don’t want this carrot.”
Er, we’ll just correct you for a minute there, Joaquin, and say that you haven’t actually tasted said carrot. The funny part of this is the what Entertainment Weekly predicts is the response from Oscar pundits. They say it’s something akin to finding soiled boxers in the kitchen sink. Well, no, they say they’re “grasping their pearls at this sacrilege.” Some will say that he very well has demolished his chances at winning the Oscar. Well, we won’t go that far. He’s not the first actor to eschew the whole award thing. Even if we’re not talking about Oscars. Let’s look at Louis CK for a second. Dude went on record, and even in skit form during the Emmys, to say how little he believed in it. He also took home several awards.
We happen to think there are some who believe the actor who scoffs at the awards and all the frippery is actually the one who’s the most deserving because he’s “so gosh darn authentic.” EW portends that what Phoenix’s “controversial” statement will do is make critics and judges review The Master once again, especially as other films vying for Oscar placement are released. So is this the work of a mad genius? That’s hard to say since we firmly believe Joaquin Phoenix is an insane boogey man who isn’t the worst person to find distaste in all the campaigning for awards during this time of year. BUT! You can also say, “Oh, Joaquin, why then have you decided to re-enter Hollywood and with such a prestige drama? Were you not happy sitting in an apartment contemplating your next big faux documentary with Casey?”
Yes, yes, those Oscar nominees who want it so badly, so, so, badly that when they finally win the thing, we want them off the stage as quickly as possible, but we also don’t want to see some gruff monosyllabic dude get up on stage if he wins looking like the process is causing him an enema. As always the best presentations are those people who never think they’re actually going to win so they do very little stumping for the award, and if they do pick it up and were deserving to begin with we’re generally happy for them.
Joaquin’s commentary may actually work in his favor, and that’s fine, as long as he keeps his curmudgeonly antics to just his work and his movie. We’ll even take him loping on stage to pick up the award with a mumbled “Thanks.” But just don’t make the whole event into a diatribe on Hollywood and how bogus it all is in film form. We already know this. And really we don’t think we could take another bout of Joaquin raps badly while he makes a statement no one can figure out until his publicist explains and retracts everything he’s done. Surprise! Yeah, we don’t need the lesson. We still think you’re cool beans though, or you’re crazy as a mad hatter. Six of one.
Good Luck, Leaf! (You guys who have followed Joaquin’s rise know exactly what I’m referencing.)
