Why I Can’t Take the Wall Street Protests Seriously

Hey, you know I’m as mad as the next gal about what’s going on with the current tax debate. Sure, yes, it floors me that some jerkoff multi-millionaire claims that in suffering a tax increase his net income would be diminished down to $400,000 after he feeds his family. That’s some crazy logic right there. No, seriously, that is something only an out of touch maniac would say. But is taking to Wall Street in some undefined protest, led by an anonymous internet movement, without focused demands or plan other to say “Thumbs down to Corporations!” really the answer frustrated, unemployed, mostly left-leaning Americans should take?

Seems like a long shot to me.

The protest labeled OccupyWallStreet states on their website that they are a “resistance” that offers “free pizza” with a winking, smiley face. No, there really is a winking smiley face on the site.

Don’t get me wrong I get that many of us, young and old, are upset about the current economic climate, bongos notwithstanding. We’re upset at what our leaders have been unable to do, and we’re upset that it looks like one side is just looking out for numero uno — but mostly we just want someone to fix it. Fix it all. And there has been corruption, and misdeeds, and bailouts, and a whole slew of things that have not benefited the American people. But it seems difficult in my view how wearing a Guy Fawkes mask in public, which the NYPD have found a law against in some ancient law book, which is lame, NYPD…will help your ultimate cause when yes, most people viewing this protest see you doing yoga, singing songs, camping out, and otherwise just littering the street as if it were Union Square Park and you guys are having one of those NYU skateboard/Ugg boot swamp monster foot jam fests.

As a New Yorker this all seems very “There’s No Tofu in My College Cafeteria” protest-like. Protest-lite if you will. Will there be a flash mob? These are questions I don’t want to ask. I don’t want to feel the way I feel about it. I want young people to have a voice and to be effective at getting themselves heard. But I just don’t think this is the way. And I know it’s irksome to have people think and feel this way. To have the major news outlets push this protest to the latter pages, and cover it sporadically in their broadcasts. It’s not the intent that missing, guys. It’s the organization or lack thereof, and well, the presentation.

I say go to the polls, make sure you vote, write and/or call your representatives. Volunteer, help a nonprofit organization, basically mobilize in a way that makes a tangible difference in your community. Get active in the campaign process. Or what you could do is wait for a better, more focused opportunity to do something that really matters. For instance, there is a subtle plan to disenfranchise certain segments of voters with nearly unconstitutional voter id requirements, and other attacks on the voting process.

Hey! Young People! How about you guys start a movement to make sure students (which may be your peers) minorities, and other at risk groups have the documents and materials they need to vote, or are armed with information to combat the attempts to derail the process. You can still rally. You can still give talks about being in a disenfranchised percentile, but now you have a tangible workable focus!

Let’s try this in place of what you guys have listed here on your website, OccupyWallStreet, in what must be the most convoluted, randomly organized list of demands evar. I’m not even going to go there about “This is the fifth communiqué from the 99 percent.” Communiqué is hilarious, and the 99 percent is apparently what they’re calling themselves.

This is the fifth communiqué from the 99 percent. We are occupying Wall Street.

On September 21st, 2011, Troy Davis, an innocent man, was murdered by the state of Georgia. Troy Davis was one of the 99 percent.

Ending capital punishment is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, the richest 400 Americans owned more wealth than half of the country’s population.

Ending wealth inequality is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, four of our members were arrested on baseless charges.

Ending police intimidation is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, we determined that Yahoo lied about occupywallst.org being in spam filters.

Ending corporate censorship is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, roughly eighty percent of Americans thought the country was on the wrong track.

Ending the modern gilded age is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, roughly 15% of Americans approved of the job Congress was doing.

Ending political corruption is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, roughly one sixth of Americans did not have work.

Ending joblessness is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, roughly one sixth of America lived in poverty.

Ending poverty is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, roughly fifty million Americans were without health insurance.

Ending health-profiteering is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, America had military bases in around one hundred and thirty out of one hundred and sixty-five countries.

Ending American imperialism is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, America was at war with the world.

Ending war is our one demand.

On September 21st, 2011, we stood in solidarity with Madrid, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Madison, Toronto, London, Athens, Sydney, Stuttgart, Tokyo, Milan, Amsterdam, Algiers, Tel Aviv, Portland and Chicago. Soon we will stand with Phoenix, Montreal, Cleveland and Atlanta. We’re still here. We are growing. We intend to stay until we see movements toward real change in our country and the world.

You have fought all the wars. You have worked for all the bosses. You have wandered over all the countries. Have you harvested the fruits of your labors, the price of your victories? Does the past comfort you? Does the present smile on you? Does the future promise you anything? Have you found a piece? of land where you can live like a human being and die like a human being? On these questions, on this argument, and on this theme, the struggle for existence, the people will speak. Join us.

We speak as one. All of our decisions, from our choice to march on Wall Street to our decision to continue occupying Liberty Square, were decided through a consensus based process by the group, for the group.

Also, er, everyone…ThinkProgress.org is also reporting that the protestors are starting to get a bit hungry. Yeah, it may be the yoga. So they’re requesting on their website that people donate money for food for the demonstrators, and note that more than $9,000 has been donated so far. Yay? Maybe. Or, you know, you guys could think about what I said and just go home and get a sandwich or some hummus, or a few crackers and organic beans. And then come back! Seriously. There’s probably a Whole Foods like literally a few blocks away. GPS it on your smartphones. 😉

Update!

This just in. They’ve posted a new video depicting what an occupied Wall Street Casbah, open market in Cairo…Manhattan? is like. Oh, geez. Just what is going on here? Is this really a protest or a Hookah bar downtown? Okay, guys. Whatever gets the word out…I guess.

Photo: ThinkProgress.org

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