I don’t know about you, but if you’re often photographed, or filmed, or witnessed looking like a complete loon in most every visual sense represented by modern technology…how can you really blame anyone for your lack of focus, your stunned appearance, or what looks to be a pained effort to read the words inside your head? Apparently, Conservatives believe that the liberal media wants to make Michelle Bachmann look crazy, and it’s not, uh, you know, Michele Bachmann just looking insane, because that’s kind of her thing.
Let’s see what the conservative brain trust thinks.
Here’s the full “offending” photograph in all its crazy-pants, bewildered glory:
Now, is this a flattering photo? No, not at all. But does it look like Michele Bachmann? Yes. Is it also reminiscent of other visuals we’ve seen of the Congresswoman? Yep. It’s painfully obvious that she’s not a good photo taker. She’s just not a natural, photogenic person. Should she perhaps practice in a mirror prior to being photographed? Absolutely.
It’s certainly possible if Tyra Banks were judging her roll of film she’d say something like, “Michele, we went through your film, and this is the one…ONE shot that we could use of you. In every photo you look scared, shocked, or frightened. This is not the way to win the competition. You’re obviously not practicing your Smize in the mirror. Here, let me show you. See, this is how you do it. [Squint, squint, eye flutter, BAM! Smize, Smize]” And then Nigel shakes his head knowingly.
Given what seems a bit obvious, how then are conservatives reacting to the photo. Hilariously, that’s how! They’re even adding in a few quips of their own. Way to help, guys! It’s great how supportive they are by pointing out a few things and using their own creative way to describe what they’re seeing. It’s kind of like someone pitying you by describing what’s occurred, then realizing what they’ve said, and then having to turn to you and say, “Oh, Michele, you know what I meant. I didn’t mean to suggest that you look, um, anything other than wonderful…uh, normally. It’s just in the photo you look uh, well, you know…”
First up, shouting head conservative busy-body, Michelle Malkin
“You’ve resorted to recycling bottom-of-the-barrel moonbat photo cliches about conservative female public figures and their enraged “crazy eyes?” Really?”
HA, HA! We didn’t even think of “moonbat,” Michelle! Good one. Can you put that in an email to Bachmann? “So sorry about the moonbat photo. Give ‘em hell!”
Coming in with the soft jab and reminding us of some comical depiction of Ann Coulter… thanks Ed! Here’s Ed Morrissey!
“In this case, they’re not even being subtle, as Time did with its Ann Coulter cover a few years ago in which they distorted the perspective to give the firebrand author exaggerated length to her legs and a shrunken torso. Newsweek perches a blank-looking Bachmann over block letters calling her “THE QUEEN OF RAGE…”
So much for diverting us away from the obvious. “Blank-looking” seems rather apt. We now totally look at that photo and based upon yours and Malkin’s analysis, we’ve now concluded that Michelle Bachman is a “blank-looking, moonbat.” The jokes…you write them for us. Bill Maher will be sending you a check next week.
And lastly, rounding out the self-ascribed comical commentary that really makes us question your thought process, instead of Newsweek’s, Dana Loesch take it away!
“I don’t know about you, but when I want articles on women that read like bitter Summer’s Eve scripts, I turn to Newsweek.”
So you’re going to call Newsweek a misogynist, by making the most misogynistic, clichéd statement ever? HA! Why not just say that Newsweek is constantly on the rag, Dana, huh? Priceless.
Hey, Michele, you know that old adage that starts “With friends like these…” Yeah!
Mostly though reading through Michelle Malkin’s article was particularly edifying since she seems to think President Obama is Jesus. Look at all those halos!
Top Image via The Village Voice