Prepare your Haterade before the show starts by checking out the contestants. I personally hope everybody loses when Mondo comes back for a surprise victory. (Shut up, let me keep my fantasy alive.)
Let’s talk about the designers!
Your dog is an asshole, Amanda. She shows us some beautifully wacky vintage hats (one by Dior!) and they’ve all been chewed on by her dog. Dog, you don’t chew on Dior. YOU. JUST. DON’T. Anyway, her favorite PR designers are Christian Siriano and Anthony, so she gets my vote even though her flamenco dress that she designed before PR is pretty terrible. She’s going to be the one to go home too soon.
He’s from Louisiana and his living room is essentially a giant workspace and he doesn’t even live alone! Your partner is either a catch or a pushover. His work has feathers (wacky!) and lots of really great patterns. I like him.
Homegirl lives in Trinidad and Tobago. She loves booze and her home is just gorgeous. Her favorite PR designer is Mondo. Adopt me! Or date me, whatever. I love her the most now. (I am a fickle, fickle gal.)
She’s from Portland and one of her outdoor potted plants has a pink plastic flamingo in it. I dislike her the most already. Her favorite of her pieces is a dress made out of old ticket stubs. I shit you not. She’s going to be this season’s WHY IS SHE STILL HERE.
He’s the WORKED IN THE INDUSTRY AND IS NOW EXECUTING HIS OWN DESIGNS WHICH IS SORT OF NEW TO HIM. I always really like those contestants, if only because I like to see people struggle. Bwahahahaaa. Anyway he lists his favorite fabrics as “double-faced cashmere, camel hair, and cashmere jersey.” I love a luxurious motherfucker. He must have worked for J Crew, right? His previous designs are kind of awful so he’ll be gone soon.
Another Portland designer. Wretchen completely ruined Portland for me, though Bryce’s dream client is Lady Gaga so you KNOW I love him. The only thing I can take from his previous designs is that his work is dark and weird and compelling.
“Less is more.” I can dig it, lady. I always root for immigrants on this show (she’s from Argentina). I’m sure that says something about me but what that thing is, I don’t know. Some of her designs are good weird (the pants) some of them are bad weird (like that shapeless sack patterned dress that looks like it was digged out of the sale rack at New York & Co.).
Quirky prairie hipster chick? There’s something very Mormon about her and her designs. The thing is, I like her designs but I’m scared she’s going to start talking to me about Joseph Smith and how she has all of these great recipes for party punch. Her fabric swatches were great, though. She’ll be around for a while, I suspect.
I trust people with lovely homes and lots of living plants. Because I’m shallow! I like you, David! His favorite PR designer is also Mondo, so yay. So maybe I like him best now because his designs are sleek with odd little details like a too-poofy skirt or pockets like wingtips. Awesome stuff.
Her house is cute and mostly unoffensive but her Manic Pixie aura is strong. Oh yes. I was right. Her style icon and dream client is Zooey Deschanel. And the music she listens to while designing is Edith Piaf. NEXT. OK well her designs are pretty cute, whatever. Why can’t detestable contestants be COMPLETELY detestable so that I don’t have to feel conflicted. Lady, this is reality TV. Get on the twee boat completely or go home.
Guys, there are like a hundred designers. This is torturous. Anyway he’s adorable, his designs are really gorgeous, and his favorite PR designer is Daniel Vosovic. Good choice, Gunnar.
He lives in LA but designs in Vegas at his brother’s house? I’m confused by him. I’m going to assume that means he’s homeless, right? So this one does menswear–specifically, sexy dudes in short pants. This is a sexually confusing thing for me.
His tank top has a mesh back. I’m pretty sure that’s all I need to say about him.
She sleeps on an air mattress, her dream client is Chelsea Handler, and she has a Speak & Spell hanging on her wall. >_<
Her designs confuse me. It’s a mixture of Samurai shape, South American native fabrics, and god I don’t even know, guys.
She owns an African birthing chair, which is a little too quirky-for-quirky’s sake for me but the rest of her home is lovely so I’ll move that chair from the “con” column to the “pro” column. Her designs are confusing. They share some of the same elements but two or three of them are made with some seriously awful fabric. We’ll have to wait and see what happens with her on the show because I can’t even guess.
Oh dear she has Marilyn Monroe stuff all over her apartment. 26 is too old to be walking around emulating Marilyn. Get it together, girl. Her designs are…..okay?
An immigrant! But he’s kind of awkward and weird. Is he walking around in his boxers? I don’t know! Color me befuddled. He listens to Robyn and Feist while designing, you guys will like that. I honestly don’t know what to make of his designs.
As soon as I saw this dude’s picture I thought, this dude is going to be annoying isn’t he? If you only watch one of the introductory videos, watch this one. The face he makes while mimicking flipping through a fashion magazine almost killed me. His designs are bad weird. He’ll be one of the first people gone…I hope.
I love her home. I want to murder her and take her life (J/K Serena, I’m not going to murder you, I just want to be you a little bit). But yeah she seems kind of sweet and interesting without being quirky-for-quirky’s-sake. OK Serena’s my favorite, for real this time.
So many New York City contestants, guys. Anyway, I don’t know. He seems OK. I don’t have a lot of opinions about him. I think I mostly don’t like his designs.
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Are there always this many contestants? Jeezy Creezy. Anyway, meet us here tomorrow at 8pm ET (7pm CT) for the Casting Special followed by our favoritest show ever at 9ET. The post will go up an hour before the casting special so that we don’t feel guilty for drinking alone.
