Oh, geez. Well, of course it does. Just naturally, the difference between Taco Bell’s new fresher, better quality offering, Cantina Bell, and all the rest of the substandard Tex-Mex hogwash served at their stores (see: Doritos taco) is the infusion of one soapy little herb. Cilantro. This takes a meal usually filled with unidentifiable meat and turns it into damn near edible mouth orgasms. Go figure.
Now we’re not saying that Taco Bell didn’t have a reason to step up their game. If they didn’t realize before — they certainly do now — the Chipotle Mexican Grill has careened into their territory. For a few more bucks, you can replace those wimpy, overly cheesy burritos — drowned in mystery meat and limp veggies — and get a pretty wholesome meal from Chipotle with fresh ingredients complete with a cool assembly line operation, and a newer, more vibrant, hipper dynamic. All full of wonderful things that they’ve labeled “hand-crafted, local farm supporting, food culture changing cylinder of deliciousness.” Also, “Food with Integrity” it boasts. There’s “smoky, spicy chipotle pepper adobo” and guacamole with “Hand mashed, ripe Hass avocados, mixed with freshly chopped cilantro, red onions, jalapeño peppers, citrus juice, salt and selected spices until silky, sexy and delicious.” Cilantro? Yep. Cilantro.
Heretofore what Taco Bell had to offer seemed more like the meat scrapings found in the bottom of a grease coated dumpster bin in the back of a high school. And to that they had the nerve to create novelty items. This would include the aforementioned bright orange Doritos taco that looks like a Real Housewife stuffed with salad bar fixins and dumped in a cardboard box. Taco Bell says to their acclaim, they were able to sell 100 million Doritos Locos Tacos in about 10 weeks. It dethroned the Crunchwrap; and for $1.29 it’s the perfect price for those who decide to embark on the chain’s much discussed “fourth meal” which sounds like something that definitely happens after 2am when you’ve finished saying “Dude, I’m so freaking hungry right now! White Castle or Taco Bell?”
But now with the Cantina menu, Taco Bell once known for, uh, kangaroo meat(?) slapped in a tortilla and shot out a drive-thru window like a late night intestinal missile, is decidedly more elegant. The menu item ingredients include seasoned white rice, corn salsa, black beans and romaine lettuce. The burritos and bowls also all sell for less than $5. But the extra special thing that puts Cantina above competitors, even Chipotle, some have said, is the Cilantro. Most who’ve tried the new options say unequivocally that the one advantage is the cilantro presented in the form of a creamy dressing. This is a game-changer and takes the meal up a notch. And people are satisfied. The Cantina bowl with fresher ingredients and that damnable cilantro sauce have people looking at Taco Bell a little differently. Nancy Luna from The Orange County Register has gone on record and said:
Miami chef Lorena Garcia packs a ton of flavor using cilantro and lime in her new ingredients. If I had to choose between two white rice-stuffed burritos, I’d pick Taco Bell. For me, the key ingredient is the cilantro dressing, which adds a layer of creamy flavor that is lacking in a Chipotle burrito.
Chipotle’s fresh salsas, however, are superior to Taco Bell’s hot sauce packets.
Beyond that, you can’t beat Taco Bell’s pricing. Depending on the protein choice, the bowls and burritos will sell for $4.79 (chicken) or $4.99 (steak). Cantina Bell also feature a “veggie” option, which includes a meatless burrito or bowl with double the amount of black beans. A chicken or steak burrito at Chipotle cost $6.25 and $6.70, respectively.
There are other opinions out there, like the ones from website thedailymeal.com, but still the consensus is that Taco Bell is on to something, even if every Cantina menu item doesn’t hit it out the park. Cilantro still reigns supreme.
Good Christ. Cilantro is some sort of taco messiah. Doused liberally on products from Taco Bell and it turns the food into a Maserati of taste instead of the Station Wagon full of regret it once was. Can we market Cilantro for other things? What’s happening in Congress? Can we send everyone a taco filled with cilantro dressing to grease the wheels of government? Its miracle properties can’t just be limited to mediocre food chains can it? Okay. Fine. One crappy American institution at a time then.
The takeaway here: Chipotle may have some real competition. Probably not enough that they’ll have to revamp their menu, but perhaps enough to lead the open-minded to give Taco Bell a try and be pleasantly surprised, which could translate into new or returning customers. And really, Chipotle, do you want to be outmatched by a place that thought of the Doritos taco? Keep your eye on Taco Bell. Never thought you’d have that to consider.
