This is America, 2011. We have our first mixed-race president. There are actual commercials now which feature interracial couples. But people are still really stupid when it comes to race relations, particularly the kind of relations where you are trying to get into someone else’s pants.
Since I live in an extremely diverse neighborhood, in an extremely diverse city, and am pretty ambiguously ethnic, as well as being totally hot (and modest!), I’ve had my fair share of amazingly creepy, and sometimes just slightly racist pick-up lines thrown at me. I’m sure some of the more attractive of you have experienced the same. So let’s break a few of the more common lines down and analyze them.
- “You’re really cute for a black girl.” The racist underminer! You’re an asshole, and nobody should ever sleep with you. Stop watching Vh1 reruns for dating tips.
- “You’re really pretty. Are you sure you’re not _______?” This is one of my favorites. Where someone you don’t know starts to argue with you about your ethnic background. I usually get mistaken Filipina, although lately I’ve been getting Indian a lot, and once, inexplicably, Chinese. It doesn’t start being offensive until the other person refuses to drop it. Do you honestly think I’m lying to you? Are you trying to make some kind of quota? I don’t get it.
- “You’re so exotically beautiful.” Something about the word exotic makes me cringe. I feel like it’s only appropriate to describe fish or flowers. Can’t you just say I’m beautiful? When you throw in “exotic,” it adds this creepy dynamic that makes me feel like I should be writing a paper about it.
- “Damnnnn, girl.” This isn’t so much racist as it is very, very creepy when you are not a girl, and are concerned the (usually very old, well, okay, 35 – 40) person thinks you are under 18/21.
- [overly vivid descriptions of various physical features] Yes, I have very dark irises, you can barely see my pupils. Thanks for telling me I have eyes like an anime character. (What?) Yes, I’m aware I am amply endowed. The more you describe me, to me, the more I feel like you’re planning to cut off my skin and wear it.
- [shouting in a language I don’t understand] I’m torn between feeling guilty that I only understand half of whatever you just yelled at me and being offended you assumed I didn’t speak English just because I’m dark-skinned.
I’ve shared a few of the ones I’ve gotten. What are some of the more creepy ones you have received?
