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Updates on Crime in Our 50th State

…or should that be our 5-0th state?

There really weren’t too many lessons to be learned from Hawaii Five-0 this week.  I hope you aren’t disappointed.  But I’ll still share what I learned from the episode where four very, very evil people used Triathlons as cover for their crimes.

1) Snow cone guys are a lot more important than I realized.  Apparently they hang out with high-level law enforcement all the time.  Even when they are just working around the house.  (Either that or I’m just missing the cues that “our hero” has very, very broad tastes.)

2) If you are the highest ranking law enforcement official in the state, with complete immunity and a direct line to the governor, you can totally just give your phone away to other people, no problem.  Like “Oh, you sat on my phone, that’s gross.  You keep it.” levels of no problem.

3) Being a Rookie Cop sucks.  And you should always wear your bathing suit instead of underwear in case you have to strip down and jump in the water all the time.

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Thug Life

My paean to the joys of Boardwalk Empire having been pushed off the main page, I feel compelled to keep the fire alive by acquainting you with four real-life inspirations of the show’s most colorful gangsters.

Charles “Lucky” Luciano

Okay, so this one isn’t as cute in real life as Vincent Piazza, the fine young actor who portrays him on the small screen. Such is life. Lucky was born in Sicily and emigrated to New York as a child, where he befriended fellow gangster Meyer Lansky and became a protégé of Arnold Rothstein. Early success as a drug trafficker and a bootlegger allowed him to rack up both millions of dollars and a 6-month prison sentence by his 20s. Luciano had a hand in organizing all the major Mafia families in the 1930s and setting up a common governing body, with himself at the top. After a successful life of crime that brought him millions and took him to the penitentiary, he was deported back to his native Sicily. Lucky slipped out of Italy and had a successful foray into pre-revolutionary Cuba, where he rejoined his pal Meyer Lansky and resumed his criminal activities.  Lucky ultimately returned to Italy and died of a heart attack at age 64.

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A Damn Good Show, If I May Say So

I enjoy this show, maybe you’ve heard of it? Boardwalk Empire, on HBO. Not bad. Not mind-blowing either. Just right.

It’s got a lot going on, lots of characters. Mainly gangsters and such. Prohibition. Corrupt politicians. Atlantic City. A borderline psychotic government agent who looks just like James Cagney.  Omar from The Wire shows up from time to time too, always dressed to the nines. Well, not Omar, but you know. The actor who played him. He’s really good.

Steve Buscemi plays the lead, Nucky Thompson, the “boss” of Atlantic City. He runs things. Michael Pitt’s in it too, he’s rather easy on the eyes, eh ladies (and gays)? But don’t worry! Paz de la Huerta is in this too, she’s pretty hot. See? Something for everyone!

Did you ever see A Serious Man? No? Great movie. Anyway, the lead actor there, Michael Stuhlbarg, remember him? He plays a Jewish gangster here, Arnold Rothstein. Great character. They’ve got a half-Jamaican actor from England playing a young Al Capone. He was in Snatch too. Anjelica Huston’s 20-something-year-old nephew does a star turn playing a disfigured WWI veteran. Lots of good acting here. Some of the characters have had a tendency to be a bit one sided, I must admit. But not all. This is my only gripe with the show. Not a lot of nuance sometimes. Still fun, though.

But what is it about, you say? What’s the story? It’s 1920, Prohibition’s in full force, gangsters are getting into the liquor business, politicians are gorging themselves on bribes. Atlantic City is becoming a major attraction, the Vegas of its day. You have your New York gangsters, your Chicago gangsters, your New Jersey gangsters, your Philly gangsters, all fighting with each other. So many! The show features many real-life criminal figures: Al Capone, Lucky Luciano, Arnold Rothstein, Meyer Lansky. Add a few interesting love triangles, casual mob violence, disfigured war veterans with mad sniping skills and you’ve got yourself a show. And Mark Wahlberg’s one of the producers, along with Martin Scorcese. Marky Mark!

You’ve got a wildly sprawling storyline here, okay? As of my last estimate, there are about two dozen major characters here. It’s all spread very thin. Many competing subplots, but it only serves to keep the show lively. You have a rather diverse cast here. Ethical gangsters, sadistic Christians, Blacks, Jews, Italians, Irish, Germans, WASPs, war veterans, dancing girls, naked ladies, pimps, gamblers, people getting shot in the head, the Women’s Temperance League, future President Warren Harding. Despite all the background noise, the show still manages to be somewhat engaging.  They go to Chicago, they go to New York, but it’s mostly set in Jersey. Gorgeous cinematography, though. Lots of period detail. Beautiful costuming. All in all, a good looking show.

I only know two other people who watch this show regularly. What can I say, it’s an elite club. I urge you to give it a try. It’s not bad.