On Sunday, August 21, at around 1 p.m. Central Standard Time, America’s favorite centaur, Alex Rodriguez, at last returned to the ball field after six weeks away for the repair of a torn meniscus (the meniscus, for those of you who skipped med school and went straight into shamanism, is a thing the knee requires to perform the functions that God and/or evolution made necessary to the pursuit of happiness and/or sexual encounters with human beings who may or may not have starred in Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle). A-Rod’s return served as proof, perhaps, that a muscular young man can remain on the DL for only so long – and by DL, I also mean the disabled list – and also that with time and patience, a semicircular band of fibrocartilage, located between the medial condyle of the femur and the medial condyle of the tibia, can make like Billy Ray and Miley and have that painful rift mended. Continue reading
tiger woods
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This has been an ugly, scary week in the real world. Let’s avoid thinking about it all for a few minutes by looking at ugly, scary people.
- I’m not saying Suri Cruise is ugly. But I will say she is definitely her daddy’s daughter. (Dlisted).
- Jodie Foster loves dicks. Not dick. Dicks. (Popeater)
- Ricky Martin’s closet opened up and in fell a Jonas. (Dlisted)
- I’ll get excited when Gooch and Meat make out. (Popeater)
- I’m going to apologize (sorry!) in advance for this: I’m tiring of Tina Fey. (Celebitchy)
- There is nothing uglier or scarier than Courtney Love’s greed, unless it is my face when I watch this clip or her face just regular.
- So someone will do this to Jemaine, yet Seth Rogan remains spot-free? (Dlisted)
- Thank you, Jesus, for taking the wheel. Did this poor girl ever have a chance? (Bossip)
- These are the “before” shots, right? Because I’m not seeing much Lancôme product here. (Pop Sugar)
- So now an SNL appearance makes it all okay? (Bossip)
- Tiger Woods makes it all okay on Fallon’s show.
- You know Reese Witherspoon’s face was ugly when she found out Ava and Deacon were getting a sibling the wrong way. (Babble)
- Theo says, “Do not eff with Dr. Huxtable. (Page Six)
- Sofia Vergara is not ugly, but her poor son is un-dateable because of her. What sane woman wants to have Sunday brunch sitting at the same table? (Pop Sugar)
- Non-ugly people get passes for everything. (Celebitchy)
- Do you do covers?
