Welcome again to another exciting installment of the Biz and Blerg Blove Blog. In this edition, we discuss the dick pic myth and nude pic etiquette.
Blerg: We should address how quickly people will send naked pics. Because I just think it’s funny really.
Biz: Dick Pics: Fact or Fiction?
Most of the guys I know privately say that they think that unwarranted dick pics are a myth, that there’s no way there are guys running around sending pictures of their penis to women unsolicited over the internet, and that the whole thing is a sham.
What say you?
Blerg: All I know is this: In the last 10 days, I’ve been sent 2 by two different guys. Both were situations that would require the Anchorman “Well, that escalated quickly” meme. Look, I know I’m on Tinder, but sending me a picture of your junk after we’ve been texting for 20 minutes? Really?
Are there an equal number of women sending unsolicited boob pics?
Biz: Well there goes that theory. What is the line of thinking there? “Well, we’ve been chatting for twenty minutes, aaaaaand here’s my dick.” Like any woman ever has been driven to lasciviousness by the mere sight of a penis.
I have been sent unsolicited boob pics, but they were not unprompted. I was dating a woman, we had already had sex, we were sexting one morning, and she sent me boobs. The heavens opened, a choir of angels appeared, and the Lord said “Damn, those are some fine ass titties.”
Blerg: It was about 100 years ago, but I’ve sent unsolicited boob pics. However, it was a situation like you described. And before the cloud. Now, if I send one of those pics, it’s saved on all my Apple devices and in my cloud. And then on that person’s phone and where ever else they might put it. Do you know how hard it was to really delete those old naked pictures of myself on my own computer? Like, way too hard. And I’m sure if you looked really hard, you could probably still find them in my hard drive some where.
Biz: At this point I think there’s a certain element of risk acceptance where if you send someone naked pictures or videos, you know there’s a chance they could end up online somewhere. It’s obviously not ideal, but that’s the reality. All it takes is one vindictive ex and the whole world knows what you look like naked.
I don’t think there’s really a good frequency to sending naked pictures. It’s either when they’re requested or you think they’re appreciated. As noted, there are apparently plenty of guys that think that they’re appreciated within twenty minutes of talking to someone. This seems like a good rule of thumb: don’t send her a dick pic faster than you could talk her in to seeing your actual dick.
Blerg: I’d say that’s a pretty good rule.
A friend of mine shared this link with me the other day and I’m pretty tempted to try it.
Biz: Well, it’s certainly better than “Are you a candle, because I want to blow you.” Line I got a few weeks ago, after responding to a match with Animaniacs lyrics.
Blerg: I thought that was a) pretty bold, even for tinder and b) pretty clever. I might have to use that line in the future. Maybe not as an opener though.
Biz: Yeah, except she immediately unmatched me after. Talk about dashing someone’s hopes.
Tune in next time for The Blerg and Biz Blove Blog, where we’ll be tackling dating successes and failures.