Apparently, we live in a time when fixing the nation’s ills are now up to the tech developers. Forget about the legislators of our country. We’re going to have to blanket ourselves in war tech, literally. Enter the Bodyguard Blanket™.
While debates are raging about where determined citizens may carry their weapons. Chipotle, obviously. Developers of body shield technology are apparently fed up with the helplessness that comes from hearing about fatal shooting spree after shooting spree, after shooting spree. Naturally, the onus of protection is being put right back into the hands of those the government and the NRA have sworn to protect. So now we have this blanket which is designed to be bullet proof, reportedly made from the same materials that US soldiers and law enforcement wear, and also sturdy enough to withstand tornado-induced flying debris in the event of non man-made disasters.
As Mother Jones reports, the blanket is intended to be strapped on a child’s back like a backpack. When the child crouches in a ball and huddles up next to other children, they form a kind of human shield. “The manufacturers estimate that the blankets provide protection against “90% of all weapons that have been used in school shootings in the United States.”
So that’s comforting? That’s really hard to say. Each blanket costs a little under $1,000, so already we can foresee budgeting issues when it comes to getting enough in each classroom or daycare center across America. Also, doesn’t it seem a bit like putting a Band-Aid on a burst water pipe? As in, “Here! Take this questionable solution to fix bigger problems that have proven to be unsolvable because they’re unwieldy, and too politically disenfranchising, and hope for the best!” Wouldn’t this mainly mean accepting that there is little to nothing to be done with regard to putting forth real gun control legislation and providing decent healthcare to the mentally ill and literally telling the next generation to bury their heads in the sand?
Depending on what we’re really talking about in terms of a full scale devastating attempt to end copious lives, could this be looked at like the protection measures of the Baby Boomer era when ducking beneath a desk during an Air Raid was the best, albeit in retrospect the most naive, option? Possibly. On the other hand, looking at all those little exposed bodies curled into a near fetal position in stairwells and hallways makes you want to cover them with something. Yes, an armored tank, but also should make those who can really effect change take notice of more than where one can procure the latest body shield technology for school children. Especially when above all else they should be working to make elementary schools safe spaces for children whose main priority should be learning, not war zone battle survival. Can you really say you’ve done your job if you’ve ceded that responsibility to a six-year old?
