TiMER is a sci-fi romantic comedy (yes, you read that right) set in a world that has developed the technology to predict when you’ll meet your soulmate down to the very second. The film explores the anxiety behind wanting to be certain that the person you’re with is The One and whether there is value in a relationship that will not last a lifetime.
I recently got asked the following 3 questions which made me come back to these themes:
1. Do you think we are meant to be with one person for a lifetime?
2. Is it reasonable to expect that everyone can find that one person?
3. What makes it worth staying in a committed relationship?
Personally, I do think humans are built to be with one person. But much like the moral of TiMER, if you do have relationships before meeting The One, hopefully you can learn something from them. That they can at least provide you with good memories if not shape you into the person you need to be to find your ultimate partner. And while I think we’re programmed to be with one person, I tend to lean towards believing there are several “one persons” that you could lead a happy life with, whether it’s the issue of having multiple potential soulmates or being fulfilled with someone who isn’t technically your soulmate.
As for whether it’s reasonable to expect that everyone can find that one person – Since when are we reasonable? We aspire to achieve World Peace and modern medical miracles, neither of which are particularly reasonable. So while realistically, not everyone may find that person in this lifetime, I think it’s healthy to have that expectation for everyone as an overarching goal.
What makes it worth staying if you find that person? Love. Having someone to support you emotionally. Having someone to support you physically if you (G-d forbid) get sick. Creating a family of your own beyond your parents and siblings – not necessarily a family that includes children, but could. Having someone who puts you first. Being able to split the grocery shopping and errand running.
Especially the errand running.
What do you think, Crasstalkers?
