Michael Fassbender to try on two costumes for size; The Hunger Games ups their drama quotient; HBO has a date with your DVR; Keri Russell makes some interesting choices; Kevin Smith isn’t a hockey player even though he plays one in his wardrobe; Olivia Munn is a journalist, no really; Wayne Brady will not be ignored.
Well, it seems nearly inevitable. Every new, hot actor must either do the superhero movie, or the video game movie. This is now a formula. It won’t be denied. There is apparently a need to see our decent thespians in tights or waving a sword around as a bunch of Ninja Gaiden brown guys come barreling at them. (No one ever beats Ninja Gaiden brown guys) Michael Fassbender, who’s been on a hot streak since his English tainted German gave him away in Inglourious Basterds, will put on a costume and jaunt around fighting Templar Knights. He’ll star as assassin, Desmond Miles, in the big-screen adaptation of Assassin’s Creed, the hugely popular video game. We have fear for Fassbender. Why? Well, because he’s already Magneto in the X-Men origins series. Taking on two of these things may be pushing his luck. Look what happened to Ryan Reynolds. Deadpool AND Green Lantern? Jinx. And then there’s the superhero/video game bone yard that probably needs to be fed every two or three years. This is where Jake Gyllenhaal’s Prince of Persia, Ben Affleck’s Daredevil, and Billy Zane’s The Phantom lives. Curses. [THR]
So everybody’s favorite death squad recruiting film series, The Hunger Games, can add a pretty high-falutin dramatic actor to its list of US Weekly magazine cover actors. Philip Seymour Hoffman, fresh off a stint playing Willy Loman on Broadway, will pick up the whimsically named, Plutarch Heavensbee in Catching Fire. Heavensbee, who is not a zany landlord to a honeycomb full of miscreant bees on non-planet, Pluto, despite my definition, is the Head Gamemaker for The Hunger Games. So this seems like we’ll get a chance to see Hoffman screeching wildly about “Tributes” and “Mocking jays,” yes? We imagine this to be like a drunk uncle screaming about “Fried Spam!” and “A bag of nickels!” But mostly this will probably add a bit more heft to the series, that despite fan adoration, didn’t do spectacularly with critics. We also hope they dress Hoffman in something fun and nutty like purple fur chaps and shoes made of conch shells and bedazzled ostrich feathers. This is certainly possible. [Deadline]
HBO announces that Boardwalk Empire‘s Nucky Thompson and the gang minus Jimmy, because that was a bit of scintillating storytelling, or the biggest mistake ever (THE BIGGEST MISTAKE EVER!), will be back September 16 at 9 PM. Also, Treme, that show not about criminals and police in the hardened city of Baltimore, but some kind of boring thing happening in the Big Easy, will be back September 23 at 10 PM. [Deadline]
Keri Russell, the 1990’s star of angsty teen drama,Felicity, will be in one of those really horrible horror movies where some flexible ghost-monster terrorizes a family in a house (at the end of the street/last on the left/in rural Connecticut) and possesses everyone so that they start killing all inhabitants one by one yadda, yadda. This thing will be called, Dark Skies from Insidious and Paranormal Activity producers Blumhouse, and written and directed by Scott Stewart the cinematic dynamo who brought us Priest and Legion. (Paul Bettany! Your career is poop!) So yeah, this will probably be unconscionably bad. Like having a gadget in your brain that makes you stroke out with your eyeballs all askew as Tom Cruise holds your head. [Deadline]
Did you know forever hockey jersey wearing dude, Kevin Smith, hosts a movie review show? Well, he does. On HULU. It’s called Spoilers and it’s a gab show that combines group chats, celebrity interviews and animated shorts, which is probably a silly thing about New Jersey, girls named Amy, and video stores, Or it discusses summer blockbusters and probably has a heavy dose of snark and other bits of Kevin Smith nutterdom. Now Canadaland will get to see it on Space, the cable sci-fi channel that Canadalandians watch. So, good for Kevin Smith and his career! He’s bridging out beyond indie films and comic books, and for the love of God! All those damn hockey jerseys. No, not really. From his cold dead hands could we pry them. Seriously, we’re going to send him some polo shirts or something. [THR]
Here, this is inexplicable actress, Olivia Munn, talking about what it’s like being on the asleep-in-a-corner Aaron Sorkin boring-fest, The Newsroom. You see, since Munn is really a journalist, she thinks the show gets a bad rap, and it’s perfectly okay for Sorkin to write her character as a flustered ditz-a-poof, even though she was introduced as an unshakeable journalist who’s seen war and sustained injuries. The flustered eye-candy thing has nothing to do with how Sorkin writes fictional women or how Munn sees herself. Whatever. It’s Olivia Munn, star of NBC’s shuttered Perfect Couples. “You should root for me, because I’m not the girl who will fuck your boyfriend,” she says. Yawr, fantabulous. [Vulture]
Wayne Brady doesn’t take too kindly to Bill Maher using him to denigrate president Barack Obama. In fact, he dislikes it so much, he’d like Bill to know that they’d have an interesting exchange if they were ever to meet face to face without Bill’s audience to back him up. Didn’t we learn years ago on the Dave Chapelle show that Wayne Brady is. not. the. one. to. f***. with?
