I actually sat down and read all three of those books just so I could more thoroughly enjoy the reviews that amberance is doing (my heavens those are funny).
This post is intended to have spoilers about plot points in the 50 Shades of Grey books. If you do not want the books to unfold in all their suspenseful glory, do not read further.
I am not stranger to bad writing. My grandmother was a Harlequin fanatic and my cousin Mary and I had a great time rifling through her books and trying to find the worst of the worst. I have a collection in memory of my grandmother. The books are entitled:
- Dare to Kiss a Cowboy
- To Catch a Scoundrel
- Sophie’s Secret
- The Sentimental Soldier
- Tick Tock Goes the Baby Clock
They are works of literary genius compared to the 50 Shades of Grey books. I won’t try to compete with amberance’s reviews because they are nothing short of amazing, but I thought it might be fun to discuss some of our favorite pet peeves about these books. I, personally, really really, want to rant about a few things. I’m just going to list a few because I don’t want to crash the server.
- When does Christian Grey work? His activities appear to be mainly restricted to stalking and sending emails from his work account when a text message would be more appropriate.
- In the first book, a character who is supposed to be intelligent discusses transitioning the Seattle/Washington state area to solar energy. Has the writer been to Seattle? My sister used to live there. She had skylights in her living room. My mother asked “Aren’t you afraid the light will fade your furniture?” Oh, how my sister laughed.
- How is Christian Grey so sophisticated? He has the refined tasted of a world-traveled fifty-year old man who was educated by expensive private tutors then sent to the best universities. He is twenty-seven. Do you know any twenty-seven year old men who are world-weary, wine connoisseurs, trained pilots, self-made men despite having no discernible skills, fashion experts, foodies and wildly skilled lovers?
- There is a scene in the third book during which Ana and Christian bicker about whether a boy has special feelings for her. It takes place in the ICU while her father is clinging to life. How is it that no one interrupted them to tell them they are the most horrible, self-centered people on the face of the earth?
What made you see red instead of gray?
