So we enter the world of the swirling supernatural and in one fell swoop things in Game of Thrones are changed forever. We’ve learned at nearly the outset that anyone is susceptible to be felled by their own naiveté, bravado, cocksure attitude, or perhaps even by happenstance. Needless to say, if one doesn’t have his or her wits about them, the world can become a very cruel and lonely place. So it’s better to have allies as one attempts to navigate a world full of vipers and flicking dragon tongues. All claims to the throne must learn this lesson quickly or perish. So says the laws of Game of Thrones.
We begin last night’s episode, “The Ghost of Harrenhal,” in Renly’s camp. He and Catelyn are hashing out terms of an alliance. Catelyn assures him that Robb has no interest in the Iron throne and that he’s only searching for revenge on the Lannisters and that alone. In that, they both have a common interest. Renly sees the benefit of an alliance and refers to the one that existed between Ned and Robert years before. It is decided that Robb will back Renly and exchange for his loyalty he will remain “King of the North.” Renly proclaims that “together we can end this war in a fortnight.” In all of this we’re not really hearing what Renly plans to do about Stannis. The assumption is that Renly is not concerned with his brother’s forces, as he sees them as inferior. Remember how we discussed being too cocksure? Well, Renly has this in spades. Yet, it’s not that he’s underestimated Stannis’ military ability, he is probably right about that, but of course, he’s underestimated his brother’s consuming desire to be King.
As he primps in the mirror after forging the alliance with Catelyn, in crawls a swirl of smoke. It is Melisandre’s baby(?), monster(?), inky man-specter(?). Suddenly he manifests behind Renly, stabs him brutally, screams like the banshee shape-shifter he is and then leaks out the way he came. Brienne, who seemed to be pretty much struck dumb by the whole thing, goes into some sort of shock, but not before Renly’s guard accuses her of the slaying. Coming to, and instantly in defense mode, Brienne takes out the lot of them before sinking back to her knees saddened by Renly’s death. Catelyn convinces her that they need to leave immediately and avenge his death later.
We are now down to four prospective kings.
For his part, Stannis doesn’t really care about the death of his brother or about how he became dead. He really is a bit of an awful bastard isn’t he? His advisor and second in command tries to tell him what he saw in that cave with Melisandre and her birthing the odd phantasm of smoke, but Stannis refuses to listen. He only cares about winning the war, and with Renly out of the way, there’s one less king in his path. Just when we think he’s totally under Melisandre’s spell, Davos is able to get through to at least his ego. He tells Stannis that if he brings her along she will end up claiming victory, and that she’s powerful enough to seek out the throne for herself. Well, yeah, she’s using magic, and we know that magic in any form is one thing the people of Westeros respect. This makes us wonder about what it is that Melisandre truly wants. If she can birth murderous ghosts why does she need Stannis at all? Why not just take the throne for herself since we get the notion that she enjoys power.
Once it’s learned of Renly’s death, Margery, his queen, and Loras her brother and Renly’s lover are not sure what to do. Enter Littlefinger with the solution. Always so helpful (for a price) that Littlefinger. He urges them to flee before Stannis can get a hold of them, and against Loras’ gut, they decide to leave, but not before Margery confirms to Littlefinger that she just doesn’t want to be “a queen” but that she wants to be “the queen.” And if you’re going to hire Natalie Dormer, this, if you’ve ever watched The Tudors, is what she does best. She’s going to be one to watch.
Back at King’s Landing Tyrion is thinking about what an attack on the city could mean, and he wants to find out what dear Joffrey the Lunatic Fuck Waste plans to do about it. He attempts to get information from Cersei whom he ridicules a bit, which probably won’t serve his cause well, even if hilarious. “Aren’t you always so clever with your schemes and your plots,” says Cersei and Tyrion retorts exasperatedly, “Schemes and plots are the same thing.” HA! This is what we’re talking about. However, Cersei refuses to share Joffrey’s plans, which we can assume is some matter of total destruction to the detriment of everyone. And we’re right.
Tyrion corners Lancel, cousin and his sister’s latest conquest, and under the threat of death, he finds out Joffrey’s plans to use something called wildfire to defeat Stannis. Well, this sounds like giving an insane baby a flamethrower. Tyrion and Bronn go to check on the status of this wildfire, and they find out that Joffrey has a cache of over 7,000 pots of this stuff, which is a boon yes, but in Joffrey’s hands? Yeah, this is disaster. Bronn illustrates perfectly the ways in which the “wildfire” will end up burning down all of King’s Landing in Joffrey’s hands. There’s no way this will be successful if the mutant murderous nutjob starts throwing around volatile fire when all he’s ever done is cater to his every whim and has no head for strategy. Tyrion strikes a new deal with the keeper of the wildfire.
As they walk through the town, Bronn and Tyrion come across the medieval version of a TMZ reporter who holds court and tells the townspeople of the scourge that is the Lannisters; king, queen regent and all, even Tyrion. This is the first inkling that we get of the dissatisfaction in the realm. We also learn that Tyrion is aware of Joffrey’s actions last week with regard to his “birthday gift” and that it’s been decided that Joffrey is “a lost cause.” This means that there is no punishing the king.
At Pyke, we reconnect with Theon Greyjoy, and he’s a joke. Like literally he and his command of his solo ship, The Sea Bitch are a joke, and his crew see it, as does his sister, and pretty much everyone who comes in contact with him. He’s taunted and disrespected, because what has Theon done to earn that respect? He’s told by his first mate that he has to prove himself. The first step is disregarding his father’s wishes and making plans to attack a larger target than the small fishing villages he was sent to pillage. It’s decided that they’ll take Torrhen’s Square which if they do will cause Winterfell to send men thinking the Lannisters have made their way north. Which is exactly the kind of thing he’ll need to do to prove himself.
From one former ward to another, Arya is still at Harrenhal where she is currently serving food and wine to Tywin and his council. Tywin is making battle plans against Robb who he admits has become a better fighter than he thought possible, and he’s becoming outmatched by the King of the North. “You’ve been waiting for [Robb] to fail, he is not going to fail without our help,” Tywin tells his council. He then turns his attention to Arya whom he has suspicions about. He asks where she’s from, and at first she lies, which Tywin sees through easily. She then comes forward with something closer to the truth. He asks what she’s heard of Robb Stark, and after giving her brother a few accolades, Tywin asks if she thinks he can’t be killed. Arya says with the maturity of someone much older, “No, my lord. Anyone can be killed.” There is something in Tywin’s face that makes us wonder if he knows who Arya is after all.
Justifiably shaken, Arya leaves the room and runs right into Jaqen H’ghar, one of the three men she saved from being burned alive. In the most mysterious part of the show, H’ghar, who speaks about himself in the third person, which is already a bit batty, acknowledges that he owes Arya a debt. “A man owes three. Only death may pay for life. Speak three names. And the man will do the rest.” Good god we were shouting JOFFREY! OH, MY GOD JOFFREY!!!!! However, Arya chooses the torturer named The Tickler whom we met last episode. Well, okay. But JOFFREY better be on the list. YOU ONLY HAVE THREE WISHES FOR THE DEATH GENIE, ARYA! MAKE THEM COUNT.
When we next visit Dany she’s figured out that her dragons need to eat cooked meat, and that they can also cook said meat with their fire on demand. She’s becoming a good little dragon trainer. We imagine dragon fire is something you want to make sure you can control on command. In Qarth she’s being called “Mother of Dragons.” This is how she’s referred during the Star Trek simulator Garden Party where she’s introduced to all types of Ferengis and Beta Droids. She also receives a marriage proposal from her benefactor Xaro Xhoan Daxos. He has the means to buy her an army, and this is what she needs to take back the throne. However, Ser Jorah counsels against making such a deal, seeing how the last one of those ended in the death of her brother, her husband, and the rest wandering the Red Waste until near death. He’s convinced her to let him try and find her a ship of her own. He’s also in love with her, and we know that because we can see his face when he discusses how “special” she is. Oh, great, Jorah. Way to complicate things.
Papa Mormont stationed North of the Wall with Jon Snow and the other rangers are on the lookout for an attack from a rogue Wildling group. They’ve determined that they’re hostile and a covert mission is in order to attempt to neutralize the threat. Jon gets his first official mission that doesn’t have to do with fetching anyone’s dinner. We also wonder why nearly everyone north of the Wall is hatless? Sheesh. It looks like cold death. Is there no knit?
Catelyn is on the road back to Winterfell with Brienne at her side. There Brann has fallen into Theon’s trap and has sent men out to defeat what he thinks is the Lannisters who have taken Torrhen’s Square which is really Theon on the Sea Bitch. We suspect Robb will not be so kind when he finds out about Theon’s treachery. And he may have Brienne amongst his ranks. She has sworn her allegiance to Catelyn who will not stand in her way of defeating Stannis and probably anyone else that gets in their way.
We end with Arya and Gendry, who’s now shirtless to an appraising Arya (yikes), discussing swordplay, and there’s a scream. The Tickler is dead. And Jaqen lets Arya know it was his doing and that she has two deaths left. GET THEE TO KING’S LANDING!
What did we think about this episode with all its dark attributes? Tell us in the comments.
As I’ve said in the past, this is a book-free space for Game of Thrones. We’re just talking about the television series, so please try and avoid book spoilers. Thanks!
Here’s a more detailed infographic of the houses.
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The Game of Thrones airs Sunday nights at 9pm on HBO.
Here’s a preview of next week’s episode.
