If we were to all give Mitt Romney advice right now, it would certainly be to just keep his mouth shut. Yawr, seriously. The last seventy-two hours have been a doozy for fellow presidential hopefuls Herman Cain and Rick Perry. And the one guy who’s probably the most happy about it all has got to be Mittens. Can you say “sitting in the catbird seat?”
Let’s find out why.
Sunday: Politico reports that two women accused Herman Cain of inappropriate behavior in the 1990’s when he served as head of the National Restaurant Association. One woman claims that she was offered a settlement in the case. The accusations allege Cain acted inappropriately on a number of occasions, one of which details one woman receiving an “unwanted sexual advance” from Cain at a hotel. Cain emphatically denies any wrongdoing, and further denies knowledge of a settlement in the case.
Monday: Greta van Susteren, in an interview with Cain on Monday night, pressed the issue. Cain now says that “because he could not recollect certain incidents taking place, that doesn’t mean they didn’t occur.” And asked if he’d ever signed a financial settlement in the case, he stated, “No. I don’t recall signing it. Now, the fact that I say I don’t recall signing it doesn’t mean that I didn’t sign it, but I simply don’t recall if I signed it.” And about that hotel room incident, Cain goes on to say, “That I absolutely do not recall. You know, I have no recollection of that.”
Ho, boy. This sounds a bit like Anthony Weiner saying he didn’t know or couldn’t recall if he sent tweets of his dong out to a few co-eds after a few days of pressure. However, right now, this is still a “He Said, She Said” incident for Herman Cain. At least this is the way he probably hopes it’s viewed. He says that he isn’t aware if there are a litany of comments he’s made in the past that would make someone uncomfortable (and resurface suddenly), but he concretely admits to giving out compliments to women he’s worked with, and to comparing one of the women involved in the allegation to his wife in stature. Is this the same as chasing a co-worker around the desk? No. Is it probably stretching the line of small talk and work banter? Yes. Should he have never done it? Yes. Should he never cross those lines again? Definitely.
The real problem here may not be the actual complaints. It’s his response to them. He’s starting to act like someone who’s guilty. The flip-flopping, the hazy statements, his use of the phrase, “I don’t recall.” Who’s giving him advice? Clarence Thomas? Well, whoever it is clearly doesn’t know these are the absolute worst things you can say when some sort of sex scandal breaks, no matter how small. This has got to be like PR 101, “Never say you don’t recall.” And let’s just say that Cain’s off-the-cuff remarks don’t help his cause. HuffPost reports that van Susteren asked if he has a “roaming eye.” His response — “I enjoy flowers, like everybody else.” Yeah, okay, man of the creepy-ass smile at the end of your campaign ads. Nope, that’s not helping.
Could this all get traction and derail Cain’s campaign? It’s a little too soon to tell, but by judging from the incoherent shout-monsters over at Fox and Friends, they’ve already decided Cain is receiving “High-tech Lynching” whatever that is. Maybe it’s something that happens when you make stupid comments to people you work with! Hey, you want to start calling flowers pretty in the workplace, well, yeah, somebody’s gonna start talking about your mulch!
Next up in Things that Make Mitt Romney Smile — The Rebranding of Rick Perry.
Rick Perry, our favorite debate dodger, and tinkling, lover of syrup, is a little disgruntled about his current standing in the race. After being handed the GOP on a platter of gold doubloons and reindeer buckshot, some unfortunate performances in recent debates had GOPers questioning their support of the Texas governor.
We won’t say that he took to the bottle or popped a few Quaaludes or something before giving this rambling, hilarious speech complete with gestures, stumbling, shaking, and dithering on about nothing — BUT obviously something broke Perry’s hold on sanity. So a multimillion-dollar super PAC has decided that they need to relaunch Perry as some sort of “Man of the People” “Heartland Americana Apple Pie Billy Goat!” Their plan is to focus on the governor’s job creation and humble beginnings under the slogan, Make Us Great Again. Here’s the thing complete with words like “Conservative!” and “Leadership!”
Can this work to change the growing perception of Rick Perry as word-smashing, inert idiot? Well, it just better since he lets us know in this other campaign ad that he doesn’t plan to do any talking.
(Holy Crap! Is that the music from St. Elmos Fire?)
Mitt Romney is somewhere choking on his own laughter. Think it will last?
