I’m sitting here in my cubicle eating the last of my homemade Pimento Mac n’ Cheese when the RSS feed shows me a headline America Sees Its Obesity Rates and Raises Them. I clicked the link and shoved a few more gulps of gooey goodness down my gullet. “This ought to be rich”, I say aloud to no one but my empty Tupperware. Why do I have this sinking feeling that my state scored high on this list? Why do I keep telling myself I’ll go ride my bike after work today? (just like I said yesterday) Why is this even news? I have so many questions. Do I run the risk of coming off like Rosanne Rosannadanna when I ask: “What’s the Big Problem With Fat People?”
So when you click through to the map, Texas ranks 12th among the states for adult obesity with a hefty 30.1%. I’m not all that stunned. I’ve been to Houston. I want to firstly brag state I did my part people: I lost 30 pounds in the last year and what this report is complaining about, that “no states showed a decrease since the previous year.” Most states have increased in obesity and the rest have held steady. It’s a widespread problem of massive proportions.
Colorado comes out smelling like roses in that it ranks 51st in Adult Obesity with 19.8%. I’m convinced this has something to do with cooking at high altitudes and actually the CDC has stated previously that the high altitude does cause the body to have to work a bit harder to do much of anything. That, coupled with the outdoorsy-ness that the state is also known for, have made it a shoe-in for this ranking since at least 1995. However it has been noted that in 1995 the Adult Obesity rate in Colorado was roughly half that at only 10.1%, so it’s not as if everyone in Colorado is out riding their mountain bike all the time and avoiding all the trans-fats that we happen to love dearly down here in The South.©
So what am I supposed to do about it? The story goes on to say that this isn’t a “personal failure” of these obese persons, which is great because I wasn’t looking forward to having to confront any of them. I know what a hungry person looks like when you mess with their food. We all have scars to prove that’s not our answer. Rather than a shortcoming on the part of the eating persons the story goes: “if you live in a neighborhood where the only food that’s available is high-density fast food…” and that “This is going to be solved community by community”. Ok – so does that mean I need to start raging against the local drive through? Because I tried that and they wouldn’t speak to me when I rolled up on my motorized scooter and started shouting my complaints into the clown.
First Lady Michelle Obama is doing wonderful things to enlighten us all about Childhood Obesity and it may be working: “the number of states reporting increases in obesity in 2011 was down to 16, from 28 the previous year.” But rather than be happy with this metric the story concludes with: “even if we’re leveling off, we’re leveling off at an unacceptably high level.” So it seems that while the U.S. is starting to stop gaining weight, this isn’t good enough. This is understandable. It’s not like it’s time to compliment your co-worker when they’ve merely stopped blowing up like a balloon. You say something later when suddenly you realize that it’s not just the lighting or the haircut, they really don’t fill your cubicle like they once used to and their chair isn’t squeaking like it did when you were failing trying to write witty one-liners in the otherwise silence of your shared office space.
But what’s the basic problem with people being the sizes they are? I mean other than that some of them are largely unhappy about it? Don’t go all Jezebel on me about it: I know that ‘big is beautiful.’ Most of the gals I really love the most, and some of the guys, are more Rubenesque and I love em. Why wouldn’t I? They also tend to get quite a bit of play – not that this is the end-all of life, but it’s worth noting. And they LOVE to tell me about it. Why is that? I suppose a few of my skinnier bitches friends are also pretty minxy too, so it balances out. I even have a few friends that I think are way too thin. I keep an eye on them for after meal trips to the restroom.
Why all this policing of other person’s waist lines? I’m obviously guilty of it too. I think it’s human nature to watch other peoples actions and measure ourselves against them. Am I doing this more or less the same as others? What are other people doing? We are social creatures. Maybe the answer, if there is one, to decreasing the increasing is for us to spend more time together and to do that out of doors. My friend Steve helps me get out and ride. That’s actually how I found my new house. Regardless of how it affects my figure, it strengthens my bonds with him and the neighborhood I now live in. I’ll probably live in that neighborhood much longer than I’ll ever keep those pounds off and if anyone were to try to take away my Extreme Sausage Sandwich they wouldn’t be a true friend to me anyway.
