Hey y’all, America’s Baby Mama, Bristol Palin, has aquired* a Newfoundland** puppy for her fiancé, Gino***, and she needs your help in naming it. Go!
*Buying a purebred puppy stimulates the economy. It is The American Way.
**Newfoundland is in Canada, therefore this puppy is a Socialist.
***That sounds foreign. Has she run him past Joe Arpaio, The Donald, and Orly Taitz? I think she should.