After being interviewed by the lovely A Piece of the Continent, it was my turn to select the next Crasshole. I chose someone who I thought was probably polar opposite of me, yet just as sweet and lovable as I am.
Little did I know that Spiggy could be as sandy as the rest of us. Hope you enjoy her responses as much as I did.
Other than your appearance, when meeting you for the first time, what would people notice? That I am open and friendly and confident. I find the online world somewhat difficult to navigate because it’s hard to read inflection in text, so I tend to be somewhat passive and uncertain there. But in the real world I’m actually quite assertive. I also make an effort in any social situation to include others, especially strangers I have just met for the first time. I like to help people feel comfortable and I really enjoy pleasant social interaction.
My very first memory is:I was about 3 or 4. I was sitting in my bedroom and looking at the wood floor. I think I had fallen before and hit my head on that floor (although I had no specific memory of it) and I was thinking about how I needed to climb out of bed very carefully because I did not want that to happen again. There was a pile of Care Bear books in the open closet and I wanted to go look at them. At the time it seemed like a really huge pile but I think there may have only been 10 or 12 of them.
What was the wisest piece of advice you received? Did you take that advice? It’s a tie between these two things: You should listen more than you talk. I try to practice listening every day. When I was younger I’d just babble thoughtlessly and I soon realized that’s not how you have a good, constructive conversation with people. I work a lot on hearing what the person is saying to me and thinking of responses to that, instead of waiting for them to stop talking so I can just say what I like. It helps me to connect well with others. Listening well also helps to reveal a lot about the person to whom you are listening – sometimes more than they realize.
The other one is that haters gonna hate. There are always going to be people who hate you no matter what you do. Trying to please those people, or worrying about what they think, is a waste of time and energy. I put energy and time into the people who love me. I trust that they will be kind and warm and that they will have the honesty to tell me when they think I am doing something wrong.
What is the one thing that Crasstalkers would find quite surprising about you? I can be an unbelievable bitch in person. It’s actually something I kind of have to keep a lid on. I let it all out at kickball, because you’re supposed to scream and shout and insult people there. Also I am the unofficial leader of my kickball league and that means I have to do a lot of yelling at people to follow the god damn rules because they have extremely selective memories, especially when the rules are against them.
Anne Frank once said that in spite of everything, she believed people were generally good. Do you believe that? I think that people are generally people, meaning that they are motivated by human desires. Whether or not those desires are “good” or “bad” is tricky for me. I think morality is relative to the society in which it exists. Instead I tend to put behaviors and traits into categories of “pro social” and “anti social.” We’re social creatures and for most of us, our survival depends largely on the cooperation of other humans. I think that, generally, people are composed more of pro social traits and behaviors than anti social traits and behaviors. Much of my personal beliefs and behaviors are based around the idea that we all share this human experience and we all sort of want the same things. I try to understand and respect these commonalities, to empathize with others, and to behave in a way that is not harmful to myself or anyone else.
What is a typical day for Spiggy? I wake up around 6:30 and urge my boyfriend out of bed. He has to leave at seven. Then I snooze until 7:30 or 7:45, get up, shower, dress, go to work for 8 hours. Then I either go home to my house or my boyfriend’s house, where we make dinner and then catch up on T.V. shows or go bowling. That’s a weekday.
On Saturdays I usually wake up early and clean my house. Then I play kickball in the afternoons, and in the evenings either go out for drinks or stay in and sleep. Sundays are largely similar except I go to bowling league instead of kickball.
How did you come up with your name? (btw, I loved your previous avatar and miss it) When I was 13, I was deeply into a subculture on AOL where you’d go into chat rooms and do a kind of text-based role playing game. Basically you created characters and then wrote a story about interactions with other people’s characters, taking turns describing what was happening. Lots of people would come up with silly screen names like Finger of Destiny and Moonshine Honeypot. I was sitting there thinking about a really awesome screen name and Spigot of Death popped into my head. It just sounded so interesting. What comes out of a spigot of death? What would it be attached to? What would it look like?
Then, some years later, I started playing kickball, and in my league you have to come up with a kickball-only nickname for yourself. I chose Spiggy, a shortened version of Spigot of Death. I’ve played kickball for so long now that there are people who only know me as Spiggy.
Also, thanks! A fellow crasstalker found it for me, but I forget who it was. I like this new one ’cause it’s kind of nostalgic and pretty. But I am sure I will change it again soon. I like finding new and interesting spigots to bring to you all.
Are you in your dream career? What is it (assuming this doesn’t invade your privacy)? And if you aren’t doing it, why the heck not? My dream career is to be one of those people at the zoo who gets to work with and train the big cats – the lions and tigers and cheetahs. Every time I see them I am wildly jealous.
I’m not doing it ’cause my other dream career is to be a couples and family counselor. I feel like that career is much more likely to happen. I have a bachelor’s in psychology and one of these days I will get around to looking into graduate school. But I don’t feel particularly rushed about it and I am pleased with my life as it is right now. I tend to take life at a much slower pace than others. I am also the slowest eater I know. Hmmm.
Quick and dirty questions.
I am afraid of losing the people I love. I actually think about this a lot. I make a distinct effort to enjoy their company now because I know one day I will lose them. I spend a lot of time meditating on that and I try very hard to accept the fact that nothing is constant except change.
I am an afternoon person.
Everyone should take time to be still each day.
Who would be your dinner guests at your ideal dinner party? (famous or non-famous)
- A giant ground sloth
- Willie Nelson
- Terry Pratchett
- Dave Barry
- Michelle Obama
The one word that I used to describe myself is mischievous.
The one word others use to describe me is gregarious.
Do you really build blanket forts? If so, what provisions do you bring with you? Yes. We make them out of sheets, actually. Also chairs, the couch, and bungee cords. The top of the fort has to be strong enough to support the weight of a cat, see. I have a memory foam mattress pad that we put into it, with a bunch of pillows and blankets. Then there’s beer, snacks, and my boyfriend.
Favorite curse word: Tie between “fuck knuckle” and “douche canoe.”
Favorite word or sound: Spigot.
Thanks Spiggy for taking the time to answer all my questions. To check out other Crassholes, see my interview, A Piece of the Continent’s and Boobookitteh’s.
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