Noted famewhore and civil rights violator, Sheriff Joe Arpaio of Maricopa County, Arizona has done it again. He joined forces with equally delusional and ineffective law enforcement officer, and noted terrible actor, Steven Seagal, to wreak havoc on the state of Arizona. How, you ask? For starters, they raided a home and killed a puppy…with a tank.
This scheme, obviously hatched at a Mensa meeting, was to raid the home of Jesus Llovera, a suspected cockfighter, and…we do not know the rest of the plan. What we do know is that the Maricopa County Sheriff’s SWAT Team, including a tank, were deployed to Llovera’s home in a well-populated neighborhood one sunny afternoon this past Spring. Upon seeing a small army invading her quiet street, one neighbor became so terrified that she called 9-1-1! Calling the cops on the cops – divine, isn’t it?
The posse of imbeciles attacked Llovera’s home – blowing out windows and knocking over a wall. Llovera, who was once convicted of misdemeanor of attending a cockfight and not known to have any weapons, was home at the time. Knock and announce? Not for this crew of cretins. What was discovered when the dust settled was 115 chickens and roosters, all immediately euthanized at the scene. Of course, it’s not illegal to own chickens or roosters but who cares! Not only were the chickens and roosters sacrificed in the Keystone cops-like melee, Llovera alleges that they shot and killed his dog.
When asked why all the fuss, the Sheriff’s office said they wanted to be able to have the “appropriate amount of force” to respond to whatever they found at the scene.
How does Seagal fit into all of this? Seems wannabe tough guy Seagal has been filming a reality show called “Lawman” with the assistance of the World’s Dumbest and Most Expensive Toughest Sheriff. Seagal and his show have been parading around town filming along side the Sheriff’s various peacock shows, which presumably will be made into something more than evidence at a trial. While it would be easy to blame these shenanigans on the production of a TV show, you can’t when Sheriff D’oh! is involved. He is not known for exercising good judgment and will do anything to get his alcohol-inflated mug into your living room.
Llovera has taken the first step towards a lawsuit against Seagal and the Sheriff by filing what is called a Notice of Claim. We’ll just add this case to the Sheriff’s 142 million dollar tab that his outrageous, illegal acts and corruption have cost the taxpayers of Maricopa County over the last 16 years.