I like lists and have been making a lot of them lately. I’ve made lists of things I can’t afford but want, jobs I wish I had but don’t, places I’ve applied to that haven’t called me back, and everything else you can imagine.
Today’s list is comprised of eleven terribly awful and annoying songs. These are songs that induce vomiting, give you headaches, cause people to have strokes, and just have an all encompassing bad day. I tried not to include songs that make you nostalgic for a time in your life that has long passed but the songs that you wish were never written. These are songs that you heard everytime you turned on the radio, went to a club, or were hanging out with friends. Yes, I admit people do like these songs and I’m sorry if YOU do but I don’t. This list is not all encompassing and subjective so please put your god awful songs in the comments so we can all listen to them and bask in their awfulness.
1. “Butterfly” by CrazyTown
I’m honestly listening to this as I write and can’t think of anything more to say than how awful it is. It is making my temples pulse, the headache is coming! Seriously, the lyrics. Blergh, my brain is about to explode.
2. “Give Me Everything” by Pitbull feat Ne-yo, Afrojack, and Nayer
I cannot stand Ne-yo’s singing. It’s just annoying. The way he trails off the end of each word trying and tries to throw some sort of accent in there just annoys me. The rest of the song isn’t that awful even though the raps aren’t anything to write home about.
3.”The Lazy Song” by Bruno Mars
I know, I know, I sound old when I say this but this is what is wrong with America. We just don’t feel like doing anything.
4. “One Thing” by Finger Eleven
Don’t even get me started on this one. The local radio station would play this song every few minutes and it is just as annoying now as it was then.
5.”Take You There” by Sean Kingston
Why would a shorty want to go with you to the slums, Sean? It’s not really a place you take someone if you are trying to impress them. Plus, lay off the accent. It just sounds fake. Also, I will never forgive you for sampling “Stand By Me” for “Beautiful Girls.”
6. “It’s My Life” by Bon Jovi
If only Bon Jovi was actually a small tree in a doctors office in 30 Rock, then we wouldn’t have to listen to this. Seriously, what is that background music?
7. “With Arms Wide Open” by Creed
The first in a long line of Creed songs that gave birth to tools across the nation. I’m not sure where someone got the idea for the Affliction brand but I’m pretty sure it came to them while listening to this song or the one by our next artist.
8.”How You Remind Me” by Nickelback
Nevermind, it was most definitely Nickelback.
9. “We Built This City” by Starship
This verses in this song are halfway sung, halfway spoken and partially whispered. You can’t even listen to it long enough to get to the chorus.
10. “The Thong Song” by Sisqo
Not only is his hair silver but his rapping sucks. Dumps like a truck, I crack up everytime I hear it.
11. “Blue” by Eiffel 65
I swear they were saying, “I’m blue if I was green I would die” but alas they weren’t. The song might actually have been better if they had.
What say you?
