The Chicago Bulls: Unless you live under a rock there’s no question that this season’s biggest surprise has been the fantastic showing by the Chicago Bulls. After back-to-back .500 seasons and getting clowned by LeBron James and his crew of flunkies, the Bulls went out and pulled off one of the best Plan B’s in sports history. By pairing basketball-obsessed coach Tom Thibodeau with humble-bot Derrick Rose, the Bulls established a locker room where maximum effort was expected and defense a priority.
TV Analyst Ramblings:
- It’s the Defense, Stupid: The Bulls have been #1 in defensive efficiency for the majority of the season. In the playoffs where the pace slows to a crawl and half-court offense reigns supreme, can the Bulls keep their rotations tight and continue to contest shots?
- Bulls Bountiful Bigs Banging Boards: Carlos Boozer and Joakim Noah have combined to miss over 60 games, but thanks to incredible depth the Bulls’ rebounding has not missed a beat. However, both starters are going to need to play much better offensively than they have in the past month in order for an extended playoff run.
- The Man from Sudan: Luol Deng has been a much-maligend player for the duration of his Bulls tenure. He’s gone from overrated to underrated to overrated to now the second most important player on a possible title team. Deng is the only non-Rose player who can create his own shot, and his ability to play huge minutes while providing elite defense has been a major factor for Chicago’s success.
- Do You Know Who This Kid Is?: Derrick Rose is good at basketball, to explain why would be futile.
The Miami Heatles: Oh, LeBron James. Little did anyone know that your incredibly self-absorbed and idiotic “Decision” would have been the greatest thing to happen to the NBA since baggy shorts. Thanks to one person’s delusion that no one would be upset about taking a televised dump on the city of Cleveland, the NBA’s ratings have skyrocketed. In the post-Jordan era this has been one of the most successful seasons yet.
TV Analyst Ramblings:
- In Miami, Basketball is 3-on-5: By now everyone knows about the incredible talent and production of the Heat’s 3 big stars. Bosh, Wade and James are not only incredibly gifted two-way players but they’re also efficient. The problem all season has been, what the hell happens when Miami faces a good defense that can take those 3 guys out of their element? The answer, not so much. The Heat have the worst bench in the league on a PPG basis, and thanks to salary cap constraints haven’t been able to find any impact players to pair with their stars.
- Boys Don’t Cry: Miami’s struggles against elite teams has been well-documented. Other than sweeping the season series over the Lakers, they have not fared well against the league’s top teams. Even worse is that they seem to choke in every big game, and that the rest of the sports world seems to revel in their missteps. With two of the best closers in the game it was assumed Miami would handle crunch-time with ease, but it hasn’t been the case. Will the Heat actually run plays that work well (like say, a James/Wade pick and roll) or will they just keep forcing each guy to isolate every time?
The Boston Celtics: 2008-2011 record before the All-Star game: 116-43. After the All-Star Game: 50-33. Injuries, age, trades and inconsistent play have put the Celtics on a roller-coaster ride for the past three seasons. They have ranged from the clear-cut best team in the league to a team that no one fears. A shocking deadline deal that sent starting center Kendrick Perkins to Oklahoma City has seemingly sent the team, famously close-knit, into a tailspin. But this is a veteran group that encountered similar struggles last year and almost won the title.
TV Analyst Ramblings
- Rajon Rondo, defunct Alien Cyborg: While the media fixates on the Boston Three Party of Pierce, Garnett and Allen, the dirty little secret about Boston is that they live and die based on the play of Rajon Rondo. A late 1st round pick who wasn’t supposed to amount to much has turned into one of the game’s best passers and a strong defender. He also has a worse jumpshot than my dad is a gaping piece of shit, but that’s another story. His play since the All-Star break has noticeably dipped and without a rejuvenated Rondo don’t expect Boston to get very far.
- Will Shaq See the Court?: 74 year old Shaquille O’Neal made another pit-stop on the “Fuck I gotta get more rings than Kobe before I retire” tour when he signed with Boston. It was actually a match made in heaven as he accepted a reserve role and gave the Celtics one of the deepest benches in the league. However, Shaq has only played 37 games this year and last week injured himself by walking down the court (no joke).
The New York Knicks: I’m going to just come out and say it, I hate the Knicks. They are annoying, their fans are annoying, the Garden is annoying, Spike Lee is annoying, the admiration people have for this franchise is annoying. They don’t play any defense, Carmelo Anthony is one of the more overrated stars in recent memory and Amar’e Stoudemire gets less rebounds on a per minute basis than a barstool.
That said, they’re incredibly fun to watch and there are few arenas in the NBA that can get as rowdy as MSG. Mike D’Antoni is a gifted offensive coach who apparently lost the part of the brain that tells you basketball is also about preventing the opponent from scoring. Knicks fans have been suffering for quite some time and I think I can live in an age where Isiah Thomas isn’t running the most valuable NBA franchise into the ground. Also, Walt Frazier is a gift from heaven, everyone should cherish him.
Predictions: Bulls, Heat, Celtics, Magic all make it to the 2nd round. Bulls and Heat square off in the Conference Finals, Miami wins in 7 games.
