Fuck nibbles. We need a real mascot.
I nominate DJ Lance Rock.
Daily Archives: February 11, 2011
40 posts
Are you lonely? Are you once again dreading the onset of the 14th of February, otherwise known as Russell Stover’s Eve? Do you want to know if someone–anyone–out there cares about you?
Well, at least one person cares. This woman cares. She cares a lot, actually, and all she asks is that you leave your “email ID” for future electronic correspondence.
The sea is always beautiful, sigh.
This second week in February marks a very curious and twisted week of birthdays, anniversaries and milestones in our nation’s history. Particularly the week of February 9-16, 1964. The week began with Americans suffering through an especially cold winter on the East Coast, and the nation still in deep mourning over the astounding death of President John F Kennedy two months before. But the night of February 9, brings a cultural watershed to the nation as intense and groundbreaking as any artistic moment could be when The Beatles do two songs on Sullivan and guitars anhair and suits are never quite the same. The Earth itself seems to spin on a bit of a happier vibe perhaps. Here comes the sun, indeed. But, wait! What do we hear? The sound of an infant’s cries. Could it be–yes it is–it’s Baby Glenn Beck born on February 10 in Everett, WA the very day after the Beatles are on Sulllivan. It is noted he wants to see the Birth Certificates of all his nursery mates. It is noted on his chart he will suck only an American-born teat. But that is not all that would shake the Earth this epic week. Oh no. Why a scant 300 miles to the east a straight-shootin’, grizzly baby was making her own way out of that there birth canal on February 11, hours later and coming on like a true American to have a look-see at the conditions and talk about how she could end the health care coverage that paid for her own delivery. And maybe see if the doctor could get himself a tax cut. Her first wink came seven minutes after birth. It was at the hospital’s CPA. So there it is. Within 24 hours on roughly the same distant American outpost in the far Northwest cameth Sarah and Glenn, born mere hours apart and required by some Jor-El of the Right to wreak havoc and lower the aggregate intelligence scores of Americans well into the 21st Century.
Finally, I could not let the waning hours of February 11 pass without a special birthday shout-out to the Once and Future Governor of My Heart-Shaped Box, Miss Sarah Palin. A humanitarian, a patriot, a thinker, a wise stateswoman, and except for the first three kids, a wonderful mother. Your work towards gaining economic freedom for billionaires has inspired us all. Your spare, humble lifestyle in these tough economic times has been a true model of selfishness. Your hypocritical and unquenchable devotion to God and money is something we will never forget. So on your birthday, you reload, girl! You put targets on Todd and the lamestream media and anybody else who questions your delusions. Who are we to shatter the illusion of a small-town, not-very-bright, but prettier-than-average, girl from the Great North Woods turned multi-millionaire on the twisted fantasies of your disciples. This is your day, SP! The one freakin’ holiday you don’t have to share with those folks who aren’t true Americans cause they’re gay or Muslim or Navajo or something.
I have no idea who this is. But he knows how to kill brain cells have fun.
Possibly the perfect Friday clip! Godspeed, Drunk Norwegian Guy, and thank you for 1:42 of sheer disregard for sanity.
[MeFi]
Since I don’t see one for tonight, here’s an Open Thread for y’all.
Welcome newcomers and (relative) old-timers!
Do you know how some of the companies that you use everyday got their start?
Visa – 60,000 cards were mailed by Bank of America to people in Fresno, CA. Visa allowed other banks to issue cards and eventually turned over control in 1970 to a consortium. In 2008 Visa was the largest IPO in US history ($17.9 billion).
UPS – UPS started as small delivery service and grew to be a package delivery company in Seattle when shoppers at Nordstrom and The Bon Marché wanted an easier way to get their purchases home.
Starbucks – You all know they got their start in a small store at the Pike Place market in Seattle. It was just a couple people who thought coffee desered better than the swill that the WWII vets were used to. And those better beans originally came from the Berkeley, CA coffee copmnay Peet’s Coffee and Tea. Peet is still pissed.
Williams-Sonoma – It was started by Charles Williams in Sonoma, CA. I’m still now sure how they got their name though.
All of this to say that big things often start in very small ways.
Viva La Revolucion!
Check this little guy out! A group of scientists at Osaka University designed him to make realilistic human expressions in an attempt to study human social development between parents and children. There’s some scientist who is totally marking off a graph being really pissed off that he can’t find a suitable control model for his experiments because some babies are happier than others, and dreaming up this little abomination. They tried using robots in the past, but the robots didn’t work “in a natural way” and therefore the parents didn’t interact properly with them. Video of them in action:
I don’t know about you, but look at those eyes. I’d totally name him “Shifty.” He needs some servos adjusted, stat!
Here he is, without the “realilistic” skin! :
Look! The full range of emotions!:
I hope they never show this infographic to “parents” in the study:
Totally creepy, but I think it could be viable. For all of those people out there who are stuck in their phones updating facebook and think that social interaction in over 140 characters is taxing- there’s a companion for you! The maternal/paternal instinct in humans is huge! Make this thing Wi-fi, be able to download a playlist from iTunes and have a wireless charging platform (it already looks like it’s an Apple product) and make a billion dollars! Isn’t a new “Chucky” movie in production?
AT&T really wants you to stick around.
If you text “yes” to 11113020 they will give you 1000 free rollover minutes with no strings attached. But maybe, just maybe, this little gesture will make you stay.
Baubles. Tchotchkes. “Family heirlooms.” Whatever you call ’em, we’ve all got ’em in our bedrooms, parents’ living rooms, basements, backyards, and bathrooms. You pretty much take them for granted until you’re older, about to move, and out of boxes. We’re all hoarders on the inside, and that’s what makes us special.
So for this week’s Photo Phriday, SHOW US YOUR KNICK-KNACKS! What sort of crazy crap is cluttering your nightstand (or desk, or dresser, or kitchen table, or spooky attic, wherever)??
Of course, for many of us, this is our first week at this ol’ WordPress here, and unfortunately, there’s no “insert photo” button in the comments. But don’t worry! It’s so easy, you guys, it’s just the simplest thing in the whole wide world, to upload these photos and share your kickshaw. Just follow these helpful tips:
- This is the magic computer code you use to make pictures appear: <img src=”PHOTO URL HERE“>
- And it’s “photo URL“, not “photo file.” See, Crasstalk is a stubborn mistress, and she doesn’t accept gifts from your hard drive–only from the internet. Upload your photo to Facebook, Flickr, TinyPic, or any other online photo hosting site.
- Or, if it’s something of which there’s more than one in the world, you might wanna just see if there’s a picture of your chosen knickknack online somewhere.
- So for instance, let’s say I want to share with you all a photo of, oh, I dunno, my stepdad. But I don’t have any photos on my computer of him, and he’s out getting wasted again at the Applebee’s bar. Luckily, I find a picture of him online and insert it like so:
<img src=”http://www.stepdadsgettingitonwitheachother.com/passed-out/shirt_unbuttoned.jpg“>
- I go to the site in question, browse new pics for about a half hour (optional), subscribe to the site’s RSS feed (also optional), and then find the image of my dad. I right-click the picture (Ctrl-click, if I’m on a Mac) and select “View Image.” A new page appears, with just my photo on it! Oh boy. Now all I do is copy-and-paste the URL and plug it into the img src html code. Voilà!
I’ll go first. What you’re looking at (above) is a fake-gold genie lamp. My grandma owned two antique stores once upon a time, so when I was younger I’d sometimes hang out there for hours, just gazing upon all the brooches and vintage pins, examining Depression-era dolls, flipping through first-edition Mark Twain paperbacks, and other stuff like that. It was all very cute and lovely and, now that I think about it, maybe the first clear sign that I was gay. My grandma gave this to me one Passover, and it’s been in my bedroom ever since.
What’s in a name? A lot, if you are a resident of Fort Wayne, Indiana, and have a stake in the naming of a government building. Apparently, the people have spoken – and they want the building to be named after esteemed former Mayor Harry Baals.
Not everyone is so enthused. Enter curmudgeons:
I’m guessing Richard Fuchs shouldn’t run for office in Indiana.