And we’re back! Sorry for the delay again…Oscar night, etc. Anyhoo, all eleven of our favorite/hated teams picked up where they left off–on the beaches of Sydney, Australia. Notably, our beloved Cowboys were still struggling with their magical decoder compass while The “Couple” received their next clue.
All of the teams (except the Cowboys) headed back to the city center where they had to figure out that the clue “To Sail To Stop” was an anchor in the middle of a town square. Mel was pooped from the last few tasks and looked about as close to “done” as Ronnie and Sammie ever got. Oh sorry, wrong recap. Not wanting to let his son down, Mel pulled it together as Mike proclaimed “I don’t want to kill you!” and they bumbled through the rest of the task. It was sort of sweet and I want to root for Mel and Mike because they seem like piles of awesome, but honestly, he’s old and this is a physical race so I do not expect them to stick around much longer.
The task itself was boring and entailed asking a bunch of locals and/or Googling the phrase on a borrowed computer. Once everyone (except for the Cowboys) reached the anchor, they had to sign up for one of two flights. Some Guys, The Sisters Who Peed In China, The Deaf Kid And His Umbilical Cord, and Mel and Mike were on the first flight, while the Globetrotters, Old Yeller (that’s Ron and Christina, more on them later), Father/Daughter, Some Guy and Some Girl, and finally bringing up the rear The Cowboys made it onto the second flight.
Oh you want to know where the flight took them? To the Outback (Steakhouse). The detour was uneventful because all of the teams chose to recreate an aboriginal pattern out of rocks and dirt and do a little dance-y dance on top of it. But then something magical happened. Some Guy and Some Girl were U-Turned and had to do the other task as well. That task? Taking a swig of ink and spraying it out of your mouth to make stencil art. Mmm hmm. Human spray paint. It dribbled, it oozed, it splattered, and it unfortunately was water soluble so did not stain their mouths like I had hoped.
With all of the rocks arranged and the spray paint spittled, all of the teams were off to a football (aka “soccer”) stadium where they had to change into the traditional native garb, kangaroo outfits with bouncy feet. As the Cheerleaders demonstrated, it is physically impossible to look hot in a kangaroo costume. If I was the parent of a teenaged daughter, I would require her to wear a kangaroo costume at all times. Yes, I know, this might make her a furry, but still, it’s gotta be better than having her walk around with “Juicy” on her ass.
Okay back to the task. Apparently all streets leading to Outback Steakhouse are named after the elements on the periodic table, none of which I can name because there was no Schoolhouse Rock on the subject. The teams received a copy of the periodic table with two elements highlighted–Hg (mercury) and Bi (bismuth). Teams had to figure out what the elements were and that they were supposed to go to the intersection of Mercury Street and Bismuth Avenue. And remember–they had to do all of this sproinging along in bouncy kangaroo costumes.
Hop hop hop, bounce bounce bounce, one hilarious face-plant by the Umbilical Cord, and most of the teams found the clue which sent them to the pit stop at an old mine. Three teams brought up the rear–Old Yeller, Father/Daughter, and Some Guy and Some Girl. Father/Daughter and Old Yeller worked together, but Old Yeller was suspicious of Father/Daughter because they seemed erratic and just wanted to bounce on off without stopping to think and ponder and mull. So Father/Daughter hopped on over to the pit stop while Old Yeller did what he does best–yelling at his daughter for being wrong, for not being good enough, for not trying hard enough, for not being more like her older brother who he always loved more.
Despite his poor parenting skills, Old Yeller made it to the pit stop. That left Some Guy and Some Girl as the first team eliminated. It was nice not really knowing you Some Guy and Some Girl.
It looks like the teams are off to Japan next week which should be fun because hello language barrier! So what did you think of this episode? Do you want bouncy ‘roo shoes as much as I do? Has any team worked your last nerve yet?
