We all know a story topper. If you have a bad cold, she will tell you about the time she had pneumonia. If you had an argument with a co-worker, he will talk about how a disagreement at work came to blows. If you are talking about your trip to Florida, he will comment about how much better Tahiti is. Ugh. These people are insufferable. This personal flaw is probably the result of some sort of deep-seated insecurity or a desire to connect with another person but one up them in the process. Most of the time, these individuals aren’t even aware that they are doing it.
The ones that bug me the most are the drama story toppers. These people like to one-up you when you tell a story that is about something bad, tragic or uncomfortable when you are looking to vent or get support. It is as though they are negating your experience because they have experienced or know someone who has experienced something worse. It bothers me because these people aren’t really listening to me and to what I’m hoping to get out of the conversation. They immediately take my problem or issue and put it into a context that involves them and not me. It isn’t about offering a different perspective but rather changing the focus to them.
I know a couple people like this in my life. I’m curious how Crasstalkers deal with people who act this way. Share your stories and share your strategies.
