Total Bird Propaganda
Man, I used to hate those pigs. Who the fuck are these pigs, to steal these nice birds’ eggs and take them to their castles? It’s just not cool.
Then I started to wonder.
These birds have some serious firepower. They have eggs that blow up. They are willing to blow up themselves up to achieve their goals. They are no better than the Taliban. They slam their birdy bodies into the structures the pigs have built, carefully, with their tender and learned hooves. They have learned complicated architechture. They have built themselves fabulous homes and protective structures. They have built themselves bunkers. Bunkers. And why do they need these bunkers, I have come to ask myself?
Why, the birds. Look. Look at what they have created. A slingshot. A giant slingshot. All they have created is a weapon of mass descruction. That tells me quite a bit about these Angry Birds.
Perhaps the Pigs are the governing body in this bird/pig society. Perhaps what they have been empowered to do, via court order, is take custody of the birds’ young, as the birds appear to be dellusional meth heads based on war, spending all their money on giant slingshots and not on basics such as water, worms, and twigs, so that decent nests can be built.
All I’m saying is that we shouldn’t be so quick so judge.
