So the deal with Scheherazade was (basically) that she needed to keep the King entertained with new and better stories to protect her own life. For some time now though, Scheherazade has been phoning it in as “Reality TV” has been allowed to creep into our chambers and bore us merely pacify us with annoying people making cakes, crazy people making cupcakes, fat bastards collecting used crap, dirty people catching crabs, flaky women speed dating a bunch of douches and the like. At least Project Runway actually required the contestants to be able to accomplish something you can judge see from home. (unlike all those Top Chef programs where they make food, some asshat tastes it and tells you it’s wrong and you’re just left feeling hungry and alone) The good news is that as of this July, Scheherazade is again bringing the goods since if she doesn’t I will cut her.
Weeds – I’m as surprised as you are that I’m starting this article with Weeds. Since the end of season three, when the suburban town of Majestic (Remember ‘Little Boxes’?) was set ablaze and we all wondered what would come of our dear Nancy and all those men in her life. And Celia Hoades. (Remember her? I’m still waiting for her return. It’s not like Elizabeth Perkins is busy.) Season 4 was when this show began to wander off – into the weeds – if you will. Nancy met a Mexican drug lord and the entire cast follows her to Mexico. I suppose it was better than Ren Mar (San Diego). Anyway, in this new season, Nancy is now a parolee living in New York. I’m pretty sure that far more people are going to be able to grasp onto this story line and believe in it, not that I’m saying you people have criminal records, but let’s be real. Another notable change for this season is that marijuana is actually part of the story again. I’m not endorsing it – as I truly do not smoke weed – but it’s fun to watch Nancy try to sell it. One final note that I cannot overlook is Pablo Schreiber, who’s evidently been eating his Wheaties and looks smoking hot as Nancy’s new supplier. Hopefully he’ll be giving it to her on a regular basis.
The Big C – Since this program is sort of crammed up against Weeds in the Showtime lineup I’ll go ahead and cover it next. Looking past the fact that our premise is that Cathy, played by Laura Linney, has cancer and she’s supposed to be sick all the time and fading away – which you wouldn’t think is funny – this show is actually great. Maybe the point is that she’s not fading away. Showtime bills this as a comedy so It’s OK to laugh. We fell in love with the way Cathy told off her overweight student (Something like: “You don’t get to be fat and rude. Fat people have to be jolly. Nobodies asking you to the prom.”), had sex on ecstasy and in the backyard, and told her shut-in neighbor off for being such a bitch. We also love her brother who is believably bi-polar and not like he’s just moody and needs a sandwich. (more like he can’t wear clothes all the time and has trouble with bathing and other forms of self-care) not too mention he’s played by John Benjamin Hickey who is also invited to breakfast, anytime. This show is working and and it’s also great to see Cynthia Nixon still at work even if she does remind me of SaTC every time I see her. Even if you don’t agree with me you can watch anything for approx 27 minutes. Get over your cheap self.
Eureka -I’m starting to sense a pattern here as I look up Colin Ferguson for this next review. I’ll admit I’ve got a special place in my heart for men of a certain age. I mean nothing but the utmost respect to the Ferg. Last season was decent if you can forgive the alternate timeline BS that every science fiction series eventually has to take a detour into. This season I can tell you that James Callis is gone and we can get back to our regularly scheduled programming (so far). The truth is coming out about what happened last season and Fargo is still manning the helm at GD. Possibly in honor of the end of the current space program in the US the season premiere involves a manned mission into near Earth orbit. It’s great when art imitates life and some would say the function of art is to comment on life so I think it’s fair to say that Eureka is a work of art. It’s not perfect, but what Syfy series is? It’s also nice to see Ming-Na still getting work even if she’s not really stretching herself when she appears in the end of this episode to announce she’s the new hard-ass committee chairperson who’s going to rake Eureka over the coals for government funding. I wonder who else from SGU will appear? Isn’t the untimely death of a series interesting? It’s like it explodes and these actors have to go somewhere and some of them land briefly on other shows.
Warehouse 13 – So ok, I’ll watch almost anything on Syfy. Especially if you include a good looking cast and actual honest to God writers. I was a little confused last season with H.G. Wells being a bad guy, no wait a good guy, then suddenly a bad guy again. The few constants on this show do make it worthwhile for me to tune in. Eddie McClintock appears shirtless in the first episode. What more could you be looking for? Joanne Kelly is back but who you’re really intrigued by on this program is CCH Pounder as Mrs. Frederic. Her eerie ability to manifest out of nowhere is intact, as are her glasses which let you know she’s not just a creepy ninja, she’s also part librarian and there’s nothing more frightening than the Dewey decimal system. New to the cast this season is a human lie detector played by Aaron Ashmore. We will forgive him for being from Canada since his presence turns this otherwise hen-house of a show into a little more of a sausage fest. I enjoy hyperbole and that’s sort of what we get with each artifact’s exaggerated influence on the world based on some small fact from the lives of historical figures. It’s definitely a good thing they added another dude.
So there – I suppose two things are clear at this point: I have cable and I spend a great deal of time watching it. I have a fondness for grown men starring in science fiction series, whereas I prefer my womens to be in more believable roles over on the pay channels. Maybe it’s Amanda Tappings’ fault that I’m tired (at the moment) of leading women in science fiction. In any event I for one am glad that television seems to be employing the use of writers again. Remember the deal with Scheherazade is that if that bitch stops entertaining you, you should cut her. Now if I could only stop watching ignorant people buying property before the economic downturn.
