Liveblogging the Oscars Red Carpet!

Welcome to the liveblog of the 2011 Oscars Red Carpet! It’s Missing Peace, Dancing Queen, and 2/3 of Ms. Anthropy here with your Academy Awards coverage. While we are excited about the show and have been making  our picks for the winners all week, we have to admit that the red carpet is what we get most excited about.  The action starts on E! with live red carpet coverage at 6 ET/3 PT and moves to ABC when the ceremony begins at 8 ET/5 PT and at that point, we will move to another post because we have so much to say about everything Oscars!

This year, the Academy Awards will be co-hosted by James Franco and Anne Hathaway, or Francaway, as we’ve dubbed them.  We’re not sure if this is a good idea, but we’re on board. Even the Titanic was a good ride.  Until it wasn’t.

We’ve got a box of wine, a box of Kleenex, and a box of Cherry Pop Tarts. We’re set.  Are you?

3:49 p.m. Welcome everyone!  We’re so excited to have you! Already Guilianna Praying Mantis’ dress is making us wonder what in the what is going on with the fashion choices. What a beautiful disaster it is.

3:59 p.m. Joan Rivers’ documentary probably should have been nominated. She is doing something right to have survived in this industry this long and I’m not talking about her formeldahyde-laced blood.

4:03 – Jennifer Lawrence arrives early. Smart girl. She’s looking like a mix of Blake Lively and Hayden Pennepasta, right? Body is banging, though.

4:06 – Kelly Osbourne took the unfortunate cue from Scarlett Johansson at the Golden Globes and went with the Bride of Frankenstein look. Also, there is someone shorter than Ryan Seacrest?

4:11 – from DahlELama: “I just realized that I’m not sure I can tell the difference between Cheryl Hines and Julie Bowen.” So true, Dahl. So, so true.

4:12 – Oh dear, Melissa Leo. Somewhere a dining room table is missing a doily. Also, if you are playing phlox’s sick game – DRINK!

4:22 – Well we certainly are getting our fill of commercials, though I can watch the Chrysler commercial over and over again. Still not buying a Chrysler.

4:23 – Awww, there she is! Wittle Hailey Steinfeld [will kick your ass]. She’s looking age appropriate and handling Sea-urchin very well. *Fashion trend note: looks like minimal jewelry is on for tonight which blows. WHERE ARE THE DIAMONDS?!

4:26 – Gah. Mila Kunis looks perfect. Is she not a little Lea Remini, though or is it just me?
From robinathefirst: “Franco, don’t talk shit about Ricky Gervais. That is a fight you do not want to get into.” Preach, gworl.

4:31 – We have our first “age appropriate” offender. Mandy Moore looks like a portrait from 1860 and I don’t mean that in a good way. Russell Brand is wearing more make-up than RHoA’s Kim Zolciak.

4:35: Michelle Williams – eyebrows and Madonna/Gwennie English accent? Also, terribly boring dress. What is going on here? Do they think we want them to look like the rest of us – poor and unemployed…in Greenland!? She’s channeling more Anne Heche than Marilyn Monroe.

4:37: If one more movie uses Kanye’s “Power” in its trailer, I will take a flamethrower to this place.

4:39 – Amy Adams – a cap sleeve does NOT belong on a gown. Nope. Never. No. The necklace is probably pretty but lost in the sea of sea-blue sequins.

4:45 – Either Mark Ruffalo is teeny, tiny, too or Sea-creature is on a platform. I’m going with the platform. He has confidence issues. J Hud brought it with the dress. And by brought it, we meant she smuggled in some Milk Duds. The hair looks like something we would see in Spartacus. Florence from the Machine looks like she took a doily from the same house as Melissa Leo. That poor house.

AUTHOR’S NOTE: WE ARE STAYING ON E! FOR THE PRE-SHOW AND NOT GOING TO ABC UNTIL THE SHOW STARTS. WE ARE ALSO STARTING A NEW POST FOR THE SHOW ITSELF. Thank you, The Management

4:48 – Speaking of Spartacus, if it were to be Easter themed, Cate Blanchette would fit in perfectly. She dresses to her own drum but her face is like, perfection, so we forgive her. Jeremy Renner can marry me any time. Classic and gorgeous. Why is the guy from “Chuck” getting so much airtime. EW! So Kevin Spacey is the brainz behind The Social Network? Huh.

5:03 – Good grief, extremists! Were all the hairbrushes sent out of town for the weekend? That look is for tomorrow morning! ScarJo? No. We want to see your ta-ta’s!

5:06 – from Boobookitteh: “Are we allowed to body snark?” Does a Honey Badger eat a snake? Does Crasstalk rule the internet? Are you commenting while drunk and half-naked?

5:09 – Sharon Stone = Cruella DeVil. JT, erm, your hair dude. We KNOW it’s a challenge but this looks like a chia pet that didn’t fully grow in. If you love America, you will start chanting for a Mila nip-slip right now.

5:13 – Marisa Tomei is looking older than she is. She is gorgeous with a beautiful body courtesy of hula-hooping (TRUTH! Look it up). That dress does not do her justice but at least she brushed her hair.

5:18 – Helena Bonham Carter gave Sea-clueless the treatment he deserved – a mix of intolerance and British politeness. Shame her dress got caught in a shredder. Hillary Swank is sponsored by Reynolds aluminum foil. Reynolds – for when you aren’t nominated and don’t have a movie currently in theaters.

5:22 – From Chad Sexington: “Jesse Eisenberg does not own a television. All these people need to be shot in the ass.” Could not agree more, Chad. Next thing you’ll know is he will say he doesn’t own a computer. Helen Mirren can do no wrong. Celine “The Greatest Singer in the Whole World” looks like she got Kidman’d. But you know what? I love her.

5:26 – Okay. Now the stars have arrived. I’m talking about Halle Berry’s breasts. Perfection! Hugh Jackman is pronounced “Huge suit, man.” Big lapels, big tie, big head. I’m sorry, was Javier Bardem saying something? I was mesmerized by Penelope’s bitties. The guy standing with him ain’t so bad, either.

5:30 – DID WE CALL IT OR WHAT! Kidman in a wedding dress! SMDH. Is Christian Bale studying to star in a Charles Manson bio-pic? Reese Witherspoon is Julia Roberts revisited (unfortunately).

5:34 – Matthew – shut up. You really ruin it. How that hot woman puts up with you istakeyourshirtoffagain? From one annoying accent to a fake one, Gwennie is looking very terrified, I mean, modern. Has she been Kidman’d? I think so. TIME TO REFILL THE DRINKS! Oh crap. That was a fast commercial break.

5:38 – Sandra looks A-MAZING! I really am not liking the minimal jewelry trend this year! WAH! Sea-stupid just told the world that he doesn’t have panties on. Must be wearing Spanx tonight.

5:41 – What is Trump’s wife ever saying? Dah-do-dee-dah-dah. Why are they there and we aren’t? I can’t WAIT to not have to look at that Praying Mantis Giulianna. Come on, show! Celine and Gwennie should fight. GIRL FIGHT!

5:45: I’m reserving judgment on RDJ until I see his shoes but from the top up, he’s looks good. Can everyone in Hollywood get a hair cut and/or hair brush! I’m about to call that mean lady from Bravo and make you all get a cut and style.

5:49 – Everything is going wrong with Marky Mark and his wife. Sorry, but the big lapels on him, the big roots on her. Just like this awards season – he wins nothing. MEAN! Anne Hathway get back stage! The show is about to start! Her dress is FAB, though.

5:52 – From Doctorzizmor: “The E! scroll on the bottom said something along the lines of “Michelle Williams is the only Dawson’s Creek series regular to be nominated for an Oscar.’ Loosely translated, ‘Fuck you, Katie Holmes.'” Also, DUH!

5:56 – Ms. Portman is FINALLY here. She looks and sounds tired…or high. KIDDING! She’s with child so of course she’s just bored. Okay, kids. Let’s head on over to the new post! Thanks Xenu for not having to look at those crazy E! creatures.

You guys rock. Go fill your glasses and we will see you on the new post! Woo hoo!