Politics

846 posts

Public Assistance In 2011 Is Charles Dickens’ Worst Nightmare

When you first meet Janine, your overall impression is of softness – she speaks clearly in modulated Midwestern tones, her hair is a honey-colored cloud, and she has the kind of posture your Grandmother yelled at you for not having.  Her casual clothes are sweet and feminine.  Today she has on a denim skirt on which she hand-stitched a few tiny flowers, and a gauzy white eyelet blouse more befitting a high school sophomore than the 43 year old medical secretary she once was.  And she’ll talk about that to me today, while she tells me all about what it’s like to be on public assistance for the first time in her life.

There’s the shame, of course, and we’ll get to that.  But first, more about Janine. She moved to New York to follow a man.  He was a contractor redesigning the billing system in the Midwestern hospital where Janine worked, and by their third date she was smitten. Continue reading →

Republicans Want to Raise Your Taxes


In a disgusting display, the Republican party is now trying to block a tax cut that NObama is championing.

Quick explanation: To pay for Social Security benefits, employers and employees have always paid into the system via a payroll tax. This payroll tax has been 6.2% paid by the employer and 6.2% of salary paid by the employee. This totals to 12.4% of everyone’s salary being paid into the social security system. Social Security payroll taxes are basically unavoidable, and they only apply up to the first $106,800 of a worker’s wages. Last year Obama cut this tax on the worker’s side of things, saving people up to $2,136 a year, or at the very most a solid 2% of their income. Continue reading →

And a Puppy for You and Free Ice Cream for Everyone!

The Chicago Tribune reports that Michele Bachmann, she who has the completely hetero husband, is guaranteeing TWO DOLLARS A GALLON GASOLINEif she is elected.

Just so you can see the lunacy, here’s the direct quote: “Under President Bachmann you will see gasoline come down below $2 a gallon again,” Bachmann told a crowd Tuesday in South Carolina. “That will happen.”

When reached for comment, Suze Orman quipped, “honey, I will be a patient in her husband’s clinic before gas goes down to two dollars a gallon again.” No, Suze didn’t really say that. But she should.

Seriously, her idea is to remove any restrictions on drilling and roll back federal regulations on the shale gas industry. OK, while she delivers the killing blow to the environment, what she doesn’t understand is that her actions would have little impact on gas and oil prices. Continue reading →

Michele Bachmann: Beware the Eye of Moron

Michele Bachman is scary. Behold her terrible gaze! Already the Eye of Moron has used her eldritch power to drive Little Timmy Pawlenty weeping from the GOP race. Tremble, America!

What makes Bachmann scary?  First, she’s, well, sort of crazy. She believes some pretty wacky things. Perhaps “crazy” is too harsh. Let’s just say she’s not a big fan of the fact based environment. Bachmann got her start in politics doing things like trying to get Disney’s Aladdin banned because of it’s pro-occult stance. The Lion King is dangerous because of all the gay music by gay Elton John, which might make your children gay. In the Minnesota Senate, she would go over to the desk of Scott Dibble, an openly gay senator from Minneapolis, and pray the gay out of the Senate chamber. Apparently, in the Bachmannverse, gay is some sort of virus that can be spread through children’s DVDs and office furniture, and Elton John is Patient Zero. The Eye of Moron sees all, Elton John!  Continue reading →

Christine O’Donnell: “I’m Here To Talk About My Book…So Let’s Not Talk About the Book!”


Hey, remember that anti-masturbation, pro-coven-witch Delaware Tea Party Candidate Christine O’Donnell? She ran for office and lost mostly because no one could figure out what she was talking about, and well, the whole coven witch thing? Basically she was some sort of Sarah Palin clone without the high-profile, but with all the requisite bubble-brained word mashing. Yeah well, she’s written a book about who knows…perhaps how to tend to a vegetable garden now that you’re a failed politician! She attempted to sit for an interview with CNN’s Piers Morgan until he started asking questions in line with the book’s contents and then she imploded into a thousand stupid pieces.

Here’s what happened. Continue reading →

John Kasich Suddenly Learns About ‘Compromise’

Pity poor John Kasich. After enjoying the rousing round of Republican victories in the 2010 elections that saw him win the governorship of Ohio without so much as a majority of Ohioans voting for him, Kasich had to watch last week as Republicans in Wisconsin lost two seats in the legislature there. Then, of all the indignities, the two Democrats up for recall there this week retained their seats.

Now, normally Wisconsin state politics have nothing to do with Ohio state politics.  However, when both states pass draconian anti-union laws within weeks of each other-laws that were eerily similar, they sort of do. Continue reading →

Today in Wingnuttery: Get on the (Canadian) Bus

The Patriots© at Glenn Beck’s The Blaze have uncovered a grave scandal in the Obama administration. Actually, they copied a story word for word from The New York Post, but taking the time to write up your own summary is socialism, so what the hell. Anyway, Nobama has once again proven to be a treacherous enemy of America by purchasing a tour bus that was made in socialist Canada!

Actually,  The Post story admits that only the shell of the bus was manufactured in Canada. The interior was customized and the bus was sold to Secret Service in 2010 by Hemphill Brothers Coach Company, which is located in freedom-loving Tennessee. A (presumably) annoyed spokesperson for the Secret Service points out that the buses meet specific requirements to protect candidates and may even be used to transport the 2012 Republican nominee.
Continue reading →

America’s Love Affair With Tim Pawlenty Comes To An End

Running for President isn’t easy.  You have to eat a lot of corn dogs. You have to go to every diner in New Hampshire and drink cup after cup of maple syrup with flinty, skeptical maple miners. You have to go to dusty Iowa fairs and feign admiration for a lot of prize hogs.

You have to raise a lot of money, make some spiffy ads, and get some college kid to make you one of those website gizmos.Former Minnesota governor Tim Pawlenty did all these things. Back in January, his campaign kickoff ad, entitled Courage to Stand–no seriously, that was the name– was a work of genius, a trailer for a summer blockbuster starring superstar action hero Tim Pawlenty. The ad, skillfully edited so you don’t actually see much of Pawlenty, looks like it’s a preview for Transformers IV. You could taste the Pawmentum. Continue reading →