News

1889 posts

Mayonnaise Sandwich: Your Vice Presidential Debate Livemockery

kaine-pence-breadCome and watch America’s two whitest politicians whitesplain themselves to skeptical voters! See pale cartoon Racist Bannon listlessly defend his running mate! Watch Tim Kaine make Hillary Clinton almost charismatic! Curse our founding fathers for creating an office as dumb as the vice-presidency!

It starts at 9:00 PM Eastern on ABC, NBC, Fox, CBS, MSNBC, Fox News, Fox Business, CNN, Univision, Telemundo, and C-SPAN. YouTube will be streaming it. More details here. Continue reading

Clintpocalypse Now: Democratic National Convention Open Thread

DNC 1Come and watch the tire fire coronation of America’s second-most despised presidential candidate! Bathe in the warm soothing charisma of America’s newest heart throb, Tim Kaine! Get shouted at by an old man! Boo at something! It’s time for the Democratic National Convention. You can live stream the thing on C-Span here. It’s also on the you tubes if C-SPAN is too spicy for you. Democracy in action! God help us all.

Hillary Clinton speaks tonight some time after 10:00, if C-Span is to be believed.

TRUMPOCALYPSE NOW: YOUR GOP CONVENTION OPEN THREAD

trump=pence1Join us as we weep and rend our garments as the Party of Lincoln prepares to nominate a malevolent cartoon to preside over America’s doom. THE TRUMPENING IS AT HAND! THE GOP CONVENTION HAS BEGUN!

You can leave-stream it here, but all the networks your grandparents watched before Obama’s death-panels killed them will probably be showing it. Tonight’s headliners include Bride of the Monster, Melania Trump, living death skeleton Rudy Guiliani, and some crazy general. Tonight’s theme is apparently “horror.”

Our Snouts For Our Nation – The Daily Sausage Rides Again

Many many moons ago, back when I had a job that had approximately three hours of work but required eight hours of physical presence, I wrote a small political column called “The Daily Sausage”, an overview of the going’s on in the political blogosphere. While I may not have the free time I once did, some things are too important to go un-mocked, and thus, for one(-ish) more time, The Daily Sausage rides again.

As we enter the summer of 2016, we find ourselves once again in Presidential Election Season, where Donald “Der Druempfrer” Trump (R-Berlin, circa-1929) will be taking on Hillary “Insert Derogatory Epithet For A Strong Female Leader Here” Clinton (D-Wall Street) for the privilege of being the next President of these United States.

My god, what have we done? Continue reading