Commentary

491 posts

Sarah Palin Writes Like an 8th Grader and Why This Isn’t as Funny as it Sounds

I’m not poring over all 24,000 Sarah Palin emails. That’s just lunacy. Especially since the political wonder team of Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore think it’s a repulsive thing to do, because if you can’t use Kutcher and Moore as a barometer then you’re just doomed. But one thing that caught my eye is what’s been reported about her writing ability. You would think that the same person who wrote speaking notes on her palm and who has a habit of saying the equivalent of monkey-speech after being hit in the head with a log, could barely pick up a pen without becoming confused – But you would be wrong, so very wrong.

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The Repeal of DADT: Report from the Front Line

The United States Army has launched a new website to keep Soldiers and their families up to date with the ongoing implementation of the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell: http://www.army.mil/dadt/

I’ve had an insider’s view of this process. I was in Afghanistan during the run up to the repeal of DADT this past fall, as well as the signing of the bill repealing DADT into law. After a short break (and I do mean short, but that’s a story for a different time) I found myself in Iraq and have been watching the response of my peers as the repeal has been slowly implemented. Continue reading

Inventing a New Game While Locked inside a Big Box Store

At the start of the economic downturn I was downsized at my newspaper job – and then I promptly panicked. I knew there were actual Mensa members who I was competing against for jobs and my self-confidence disappeared. I am smart enough to know that when I get scared I get dumb, but that didn’t stop me from taking the first job I was offered – wearing a name tag in a big box store.

And yes, it was as horrible as you imagine that it would be. Continue reading

The Twister

The gravestones can be seen now, from the far side of Meadow Lake. They rise, chunks of slate embedded into a green hill, into a blue sky, looking like a skyline for a town of the dead. Massive oak and weeping willows once gave the dead privacy, but those trees are no more. Continue reading

Sarah Palin Thinks You Have $11.00 You’d Love to Shove in her Pocket

The queen of all media and synergistic brain vomit, Sarah Palin, would like you to come see her at the movies! Yes, I can’t think of a better way to lobotomize myself, so sure, let’s all go to the movies and watch Sarah Palin dance around with a crown of doughnuts on her head while she winks and garbles human language and just basically runs around in a movie about lies and magic hair bumpits. Fantastic!

On with the show!

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Tracy Morgan’s Homophobic Tirade

During a stand-up routine in Nashville on June 3rd, Tracy Morgan went off on a homophobic tirade, much to the chagrin of pro-LGBT 30 Rock fans around the world. (Basically all of the smart, beautiful, and awesome people.) Damn Tracy, damn. Couldn’t you just flirt and send pictures of your junk to random ladies on Twitter? That I could forgive. Homophobia in this day and age is just plain ol’ stupid. Everyone who’s anyone knows that. Continue reading