Just when the cold, ridiculous corpse of Mitt Romney’s presidential campaign has been in the ground less than three months, there are those in the GOP who’d like to see another Romney on a political ticket.
Oh, ho! That’s insane. Don’t you guys remember what you said a few months ago about the Mitt Romney types no longer being the guys who could get things done for the GOP? You know all that stuff about embracing the “new America?” Well, whatever. They don’t really think those things! That’s just something they’ll throw out there when confronted about the truth as it pertains to the growing diversity in this country. What they really meant to say is, “Well, Mitt Romney was a desperation drone sent from Romneyboring Xanax Five of the UpShit’sCreek Space System. He was clearly an anomaly that we thought would work against Mecca Messiah Obamatron Kumbaya. That was a miscalculation. We need to go younger and better, or perhaps we need less experienced and more womanier!”
John Kerry’s ascension to Secretary of State has left an opening for his Senate seat and Republicans in their infinite wisdom, which has been shown in various ways since the presidential election season began (Herman Cain! Michelle Bachmann! Rick Perry!), are urging either Tagg Romney or his mother, Ann, to get in the race.
Oh, good grief. Really? Are they really trying to get two people even less interesting and involved in politics into the Senate race based on name recognition alone? Yes, yes they are. For instance, Ann, with the exception of smiling for cameras and shouting at a stunned audience “I Love You Women!” in a way that made most everyone’s toes curl in awkward uncomfortableness, has never been in politics save for attending Belmont, MA, Town Meetings in the 1970’s.
And Tagg Romney for what it’s worth, the father of six, is said to have been a “regular” on the campaign trail with his father. Which to us can mean anything from fetching coffee, to hanging out on the bus, to driving his dad home in his Saab the evening of his election loss. Yeah, Tagg, is now thinking about it and weighing a run for Senate against staying a very rich guy at his successful venture capital firm, Solamere. Urgh. Here we go again. Another corporate Romney. Sure, GOP. That’s the way to reach all those groups you alienated in the 2012 election cycle with Mitt Romney’s rich man obtuseness, his unflinching disdain for 47% of the country, and his dependence on binders full of women. Let’s get Eddie Munster in there creating yet another snow globe full of assholery while passing it off as real concern for 100% of tax paying citizens in this country.
Hilariously, Tagg is said to have bolstered his Twitter profile in response to all the buzz. We can only imagine what it says. “Remember when I wanted to Punch President Obama? Well, right now, punch your ticket and send me to Washington. I’ll work for you, America. I don’t know what I’ll do yet, but I won’t be like my lying, joker of a dad, who didn’t even want to be president. Oops did I say that out loud?”
Yes, Tagg. That was very big news. So why do you want to be a senator, again?
Image: Flickr
