I was recently at the checkout lane at the grocery store, and was treated to these two covers: Emma Stone on the cover of Vogue and Kristen Stewart on the cover of Vanity Fair. All I can say is ugh… Both covers were shot by Mario Testino, who at this point is just phoning it in.
Emma Stone for Vogue
Maybe you don’t recognize the lovely Olive from Easy A on the cover of July’s Vogue. Her blond locks and deer in the headlights look give the impression that she’s a shy mail-order bride from Eastern Europe hoping and praying that some gentle man will whisk her away to America. Also, the slip she is wearing gives the impression that you can see her ribs, which adds to the aura of despair that surrounds this cover.
Kristen Stewart for Vanity Fair
Yes, Kristen’s eye makeup looks gorgeous, even if she’s giving that dead-eye, open-mouth look that’s so popular these days. But what the heck is going on with her posture? How can she be hunched over, stretching her neck, and sticking out her jaw at the same time? The rest of the photo shoot makes her look quite lovely, but I am not really interested in buying the magazine with that odd cover. Also, I am pretty sure the “dog” is really one of The Bloggess’ taxidermy animals.
Bonus: Selena Gomez for Elle
When I first saw this cover, I hated it. As I was researching the images for this post, I couldn’t decide if she looks gorgeous like a late 80s/early 90s supermodel, or if the brown eye makeup makes her look like a vampire Lolita. Since I couldn’t decide whether or not I hated the cover, I figured I would let you decide.